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Apples Pears Jokes

44 apples pears jokes and hilarious apples pears puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about apples pears that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Apples Pears Short Jokes

Short apples pears jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The apples pears humour may include short apple and pear jokes also.

  1. Gave my daughter an apple for breakfast this morning 🍎 She said she only likes pears!
    So I gave her another apple. 🍎🍎
  2. A farmer just burst into tears because nobody likes eating his apples anymore... I told him to grow a pear.
  3. I gave my friend an apple, and he told me he preferred pears. So I gave him another apple.
  4. My mate quit the rat race to become an apple farmer, and now he's whining about how much work it is. So I told him to just grow a pear.
  5. Steve jobs goes to Heaven.. .. As he steps up to the pearly gates, St. Peter looks at him with a frown on his face, points downwards and says: You know how we feel about Apples up here.
  6. My doctor told me I had to add more apples, pears, and berries to my diet It was a fruitful checkup.
  7. Why couldn't the apples go to the homecoming dance? Because only PEARS were allowed! get it? pears! ok bye..
  8. Apple literally named their company after an Apple 🍎 But then expect you to pear your Airpods? 🍐
  9. What did the apple say to the pear? No idea. I figured if anyone knew what fruits talked about it would be you.
    Aaaannnd here come the downvotes...
  10. Watermelon cantaloupe But apple pears

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Apples Pears One Liners

Which apples pears one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with apples pears? I can suggest the ones about pears and apples and oranges.

  1. I told my neighbor I was too scared to grow an apple tree. He said grow a pear.
  2. Apple farmers who are too scared to diversify should just grow a pear.
  3. I used to weep over my poor apple harvest. Then I grew a pear.
  4. I tried to put two apples together But then I got a pear
  5. My neighbor says he is too afraid to plant an apple tree. I told him, "Grow a pear"!
  6. When is an Iphone not an Apple? When there's two of them. Then it's a pear.
  7. What do you say to someone too scared to plant apples ? Grow a pear.
  8. I know you can't compare apples to oranges... ...but two apples do make a pear.
  9. My buddy told me he was too afraid to grow apples. I was like, bro, grow a pear.
  10. What do you call two apples next to each other? A pear.
  11. What got the apple into skydiving? Pear pressure.
  12. Why can't you connect 2 speakers at the same time to an apple device? They work in pears.
  13. Why can't fruit be compared? Apples and oranges cannot be peared.
  14. Why don't boobies make apple juice? BECAUSE GIRLS ONLY HAVE A "PEAR" AHAHEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUE
  15. My mum is allergic to apples and pears That's why we live in a bungalow

Cheeky Apples Pears Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle

What funny jokes about apples pears you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean apple picking jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make apples pears pranks.

A new supermarket opened near me a few weeks ago.

They're trying a new thing: immersion! For example, when you stop by the deli you can smell fresh grass and hear cows mooing, at the fish section you smell sea salt and feel a small bit of spray on your face, and at the fruit stall you can see mist on the apples, and smell fields of oranges and pears.
I don't get toilet roll there anymore.

I went to buy some fruit yesterday...

I walked into the store intending to buy an apple. So I asked the cashier "How much do apples cost?"
He said that they were 50p each, but bananas and pears were only 30p each.
So I said "Oh ok then, I'll take a pear".
He gave me two apples and charged me £1.

What is the difference between an apple and a pear?

Anyone can grow an apple. It takes courage to grow a pear.

What do you get when you cross an apple with a Christmas tree?

A pear.