Following is our collection of Apple jokes which are very funny. There are some apple airpods jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these apple ipatch puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
I would say that they both think de-porting is the answer when there's no more Jobs, but I shouldn't compare apples to oranges.
It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
...smell their apple juice before they drink it.
Apparently iTouch kids isn't a good product name.
A sudden desert storm had made a traveler lost his direction. The only thing he had was an apple. It was so precious, whenever he was thirsty or hungry, he would only look at the apple, then he would walk again full of hope.
Unfortunately, he still died in the desert. It was written on the police report: He would have walked out of the desert if he had had a Samsung or Nokia.
The apple didn't fall far from the tree.
They claim that the Galaxy S3 has copied concepts used on the iPhone 6.
Now we know why the iPhone 6 can't stay straight
It's already run out of battery.
For the watch
A doctor and an engineer loved the same girl.
Doctor used to give her a rose daily
and engineer used to give the girl an apple.
Girl got confused and asked engineer : There is a meaning of giving rose in Love,
Why are you giving apple ?
Engineer answered : Because
"An apple a day keeps the doctor away".
You can explore apple macs reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean apple ipad dad jokes. There are also apple puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
a bird sitting in the tree asks "Hey, Bear, why are you up in this tree?"
the bear says "I came up here to eat apples."
the bird says "But Bear, this isn't an apple tree. there are no apples up here."
the bear says "That's ok, I brought my own."
I guess that makes me an iWitness.
Police are confident they can recover both the stolen machines.
Only two were invited, but the third one got in through the backdoor.
It's not my fault they don't have Windowsο»Ώ
The man answers: "Wow, how did you know?"
Cashier: "Because you're ugly."
He got fired.
Does that make you an iWitness?
$25k worth of merchandise was stolen. The police said that they will get both computers back.
To ask him about ideas for the new iPhone.
The disgruntled designer told them "Jack off".
The marketing department found the idea fantastic.
should just grow a pear.
I tried the iHop and it only made me gain weight.
...bought one apple for a dollar with my savings. Then I went out on the street and sold it there for two dollars. With the two dollars I bought two apples for 1$ each and again sold them for 2 dollars each. Now I've had 4 dollars and was able to buy 4 apples, which, you may have guessed, I sold for 2 dollars each. Now I've had 8 dollars and I bought 8 apples and so on and so on...
A few days later my aunt died and I inherited her assets.
It was an apple, and a very bad one at that. It only took one byte for everything to crash.
because he didn't know Mandarin
An iPatch... I'm sorry...
The apple, the emo is stopped by the rope.ο»Ώ
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: 'Take only ONE . God is watching.'
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples
The first people to not read the Apple terms and conditions.
An old man is dying, with his young grandson by his bedside. He asks his grandson to lean over and whispers "Johnny, I smell your grandma's apple pie. Looks like she took it of the oven. Go to the kitchen and bring me a piece. It's my favorite."
Johnny gets up and leaves. 2 minutes later he comes back empty handed and says "Sorry, grandpa, but grandma says its for after the funeral."
when they call it an iPhone 6+ and it's only 5.5 inches.
Cause OJ will kill you.
Every day, the doctor brings her a flower, while the programmer brings her an apple.
Eventually, she chooses to go out with the programmer.
Outraged, the doctor asks the programmer why he brought her apples.
The programmer responded An Apple a day keeps the doctor away
Then we would still be in paradise as they would eat the snake instead of the apple.
I'm going to be an iWitness at the trial
Eve: I got an Apple.
Adam: ...
Eve: ...
Adam: ...
Eve: What?
Adam: I thought we'd decided on Android.
Eve: The serpent said this was better.ο»Ώ
Give them options.
Would it release nine eleven next year
Edit : my first 24 hours top 10 thanks all
Or a pharmacy, or maybe a shoe store.
The Chargers suck.
A man asks a Russian: What nationality were Adam and Eve?
The Russian replies: Soviet of course!
The man asks: How do you know?
To which the Russian replies: Well they were both naked, had only an apple to eat, and thought they were in paradise.
He adjusts the volume.
Another one would have been an XS
"Look at their calm, their reserve" says the Briton. "Surely they must be British!"
"Nonsense!" Replies the Frenchman. "They are beautiful. Surely they must be French!"
The Russian finally speaks, "they have no clothes, no shelter, only an apple to eat, and are being told this is paradise. They are Russian."
Couldn't they just download it from the App Store for free?
So later the police called me as an iwitness.
Because her client came in cider.
I'm the only iWitness
Plastic Explosives.
And those are the Pie-Rates of the Caribbean.
... does that make you an iWitness?
Minneapolis
One grabbed the trucker's cheeseburger and took a huge bite from it. The second one drank the trucker's coffee, and the third wolfed down his apple pie. The truck driver didn't say a word as he paid the waitress and left.
As the waitress walked up, one of the motorcyclists growled, "He ain't much of a man, is he?"
"He's not much of a driver, either," the waitress replied. "He just backed his 18-wheeler over three motorcycles."
'Thankfully the looters took nothing but two iPhones' the store's associate manager said.
One rich man is asked how he got rich. He answers: I bought one unwashed apple in the market for a dollar, washed it and sold it for 2, then bought 2 unwashed apples, washed it and sold it for 4. -And so gradually you got rich? - No, after 2 years, my grandmother died and left me a legacy of 4 billion dollars, and I stopped doing nonsense
A really fast apple.
Because the greatest gifts are the ones your children made.
(inspired by u/lorenzomofo 's comment on a
r/nextfuckinglevel post)
My 2 year old is eating an apple and asked me: what does the apple say?
Me: I don't know
2 year old: yummy!
I don't know if this is the right place for it but the pride on his face for making me laugh was the best part of my day!
It was an apple with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte & then everything crashed.
They are looking at a painting of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden.
"Look at how reserved and calm they are," the Englishman says, "they would definitely be English."
"They are naked and beautiful, they would have to be French." The Frenchmen counters.
The Russian speaks up, "no clothes, no shelter, no bed, they have only an apple between them, and they're told this is paradise. They are certainly Russian."
Then I threw my apple away
It will be the first apple product with windows.
They're going to call it the iAye
Just got mine and I already lost 400 pounds!
Because there is no windows
Would not recommend, it tastes like metal and plastic
Policeman: What are you selling?
Vendor: Apple seeds... $5 a pop!
Policeman: What???Why would anyone want to eat apple seed?
Vendor: They make you smarter!
Policeman: OK, give me one (swallows it)... wait a minute? For $5 I could have bought a pound of apples and got myself at least 20 seeds!
Vendor: See!!! You're smarter already!
Policeman: WOW, you're right... Give me two more, quick!
Because they haven't installed any Windows.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the apple ios jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working apple magical apples piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.