The Best 38 Appearance Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Appearance jokes. There are some appearance shape jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these appearance hurriedly puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Appearance Jokes and Puns

A bear is chasing a mouse through the woods..

When suddenly a genie appears. The mouse and bear stop dead in their tracks, perplexed at the genie's appearance. The genie offers to give both the bear and mouse three wishes. The bear, not hesitating, goes first; "I wish all the bears in these woods were female." The genie laughs and moves onto the mouse. "I wish for a motorcycle." The genie nods and moves back to the bear. "I wish all the bears in the world were female." The genie laughs again. The mouse asks for a motorcycle helmet. The genie gives it to the mouse and looks at the bear one last time. "I wish all the female bears wanted me." The genie goes, "My man!" and looks to the mouse for his final wish. The mouse gets on his motorcycle, starts it up, puts his helmet on and says, "I wish the bear was gay." and the mouse zooms off.

How many countries' flags make an appearance at every auto race in the world?

Two. Libya's to start the race, and France's to signal there's one lap to go.

If a penis/vagina was asked to judge your appearance it would probably say....

Urinate

Appearance joke, If a penis/vagina was asked to judge your appearance it would probably say....

How does an overweight girl feel better about her own appearance?

Googles "Pictures of Ellen Pao"

Young Forever

Nutritionists say people who eat less tend to be younger in appearance. It is true. One of my friends hadn't eaten for 10 days, he's forever 25 years old now.


Geek Booty Call... Fan Fiction

You're totally fan-fic worthy. I think someone's about to make an
appearance in Kirk's quarters next chapter.

A leper walks into a restaurant

He sits down to have dinner. His oozing sores and appearance make him nervous. He later notices a woman look at him and throw up. He walks over to apologize for his appearance ruining her dinner. She says "oh, it's not you. It's the guy behind you dipping his shrimp in your neck."

Appearance joke, A leper walks into a restaurant

A guy walks into a bar

The bartender says "What can I get for you sir?"

Guy says "How dare you assume my gender on my appearance!"

I've started wearing a stethoscope around my neck...

So, if there's a medical emergency I get to teach people a valuable lesson about making assumptions based on someone's appearance.

Gareth Gates' appearance in Chester tonight has been cancelled

His taxi to the venue ended up in Chichester.

I guess ISIS didn't need to make an appearance in Times Square....

Especially since Mariah Carey already bombed

You can explore appearance complexion reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean appearance presence dad jokes. There are also appearance puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


I greeted the mailman at the door naked

He freaked out. Not so much because of my appearance, more because I knew where he lived.

I had the court appearance for my encounter with the grammar police today...

The judge gave me a run on sentence!

Why do most women pay more attention to their appearance than improving their minds?

Because most men are stupid but few are blind.

What do you call a musical gnome that cares a lot about its appearance?

A metrognome

In the last interview, Mick Jagger revealed the secret of his young appearance.

He said, 'Just stand by Keith.'

Appearance joke, In the last interview, Mick Jagger revealed the secret of his young appearance.

Danny Glover made a special appearance at a high school drama class to help teach improv. He only said one line,

"I'm too old for this skit."

A mathematician wasn't too confident about his appearance...

So he asked his friend to compare his good looks in terms he could understand.
After little thought his friend says: "You're about as good looking as you are bad looking."
"Well that's just mean."

The reason I check my hair and my general appearance so often, is because of this one bad day. I can't even say I remember it, but I am told my hair was a mess, I was covered with unspeakable fluids, had trouble breathing, couldn't even stand, and I cried in front of everyone.

I'm still trying to live down the day I was born.


Mark Zuckerberg refuses formal appearance before Parliament

Couldn't find a tux with a hoodie

What show did John Cena and his pregnant wife make an appearance on?

I Didn't Know I was Pregnant

One of the big themes in Sartre's philosophy is the idea of genuine choice versus just the appearance of having a choice.

So he can't meaningfully choose to have his coffee with no cream, because he could never have had it with cream to begin with, but he can meaningfully choose to have it with no milk.

The Miss America will no longer judge contestants based on physical appearance

But somehow I'm sexist for spreading this news to coworkers I think would be interested.

*HAPPY FATHER'S DAY...*

A new teacher Joins school... She finds two boys looking very similar in appearance...

Teacher asks:- " Twins...???"

Boy:- No... *"NEIGHBOURS"*

I'm all for women who get plastic surgery. Because plastic surgery allows you to make your outer appearance resemble your inner appearance.

Fake.

Credit - Daniel Tosh

New announcement about Stan Lee's funeral

It will feature a cameo appearance by Stan Lee.

I think it is important to be self-aware of one's appearance...

For example, my mother says that I'm very thin.

I say that I'm just regular skinny.

And my father says that I'm a complete loser.

A rockslide wiped out a concert not long ago.

The Rolling Stones made quite an appearance.

I hear the new Star was movie will include a Hispanic Jedi Knight.

I can't wait to see Obi Juan Kenobi make his first on-screen appearance.

VA Governor Northam has not made a public appearance since Saturday

This is partly thanks to a tunnel system that connects his residence to his office. It is predicted that when he does resurface & sees his shadow, we are guaranteed 6 more weeks of scandals.

Funny Courtroom Transcript

Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

People have silly hang ups about their personal appearance.

I worry that one of my balls is bigger than the other two.

Kim Jong-Un has reportedly made a public appearance after opening a fertiliser factory.

I smell bullshit.

Buttox surgery

A woman goes into work and receives a bunch of compliments regarding her appearance. Another woman asks what her secret was and the first woman said she had buttox surgery. Confused the second woman asks "Do you mean botox?" The first said "No, buttox. I sat down really fast and hard then all the fat in my ass went to my face."

A woman is arrested for killing her guitar player husband

She is accused of bashing her husband's head in with his guitars because he never paid any attention to her.

In her first court appearance, the judge looks at the woman and asks: First offender?"

The woman replies: No. First it was a Gretsch, followed by a Gibson, and then a Fender."

What do you call an elephant that is pleasingly graceful and stylish in appearance and manner?

An elegant.

The DJ played the Cha Cha Slide, so I did the Cha Cha Slide,

The DJ played Macarena, so I did the Macarena,

The DJ played Come On Eileen, and now I have an upcoming court appearance.

A girl added me and sent me a picture of herself

She looked so much like someone who would judge me based of my appearance so i blocked her.
Cut toxic people out of your life because you deserve better (:

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the appearance persona jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working appearance debut piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes