The Best 14 Apartments Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Apartments jokes. There are some apartments appartment jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these apartments bungalows puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Apartments Jokes and Puns

An elderly gentleman was on his deathbed as his wife and three children and nurse stood close by

Then he spoke: Bill, you take the Beverly Hills houses. Mary, you take the offices in the Center Center. Debra, the apartments over the L.A. Plaza are yours. To my dear wife, take all the residential buildings near downtown.
The nurse was really impressed. She said, Your husband must have been quite a man, amassing so much property to leave to all of you.
And the wife responded, What property? … the schmuck had a paper route!!

What do you call cheap apartments in the Middle East?

Low rents of Arabia.

Morris Schwartz is dying and on his deathbed.

He is surrounded by his nurse, his wife, his daughter and two sons, and knows the end is near. So he says to them:

"Bernie, I want you to take the Beverly Hills houses."

"Sybil, take the apartments over in Los Angeles Plaza."

"Hymie, I want you to take the offices over in City Center."

"Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings downtown."

The nurse is just blown away by all this, and as Morris slips away, she says to the wife, "Mrs. Schwartz, your husband must have been such a hard working man to have accumulated so much property."

Sarah replies, "Property shmoperty...the schmuck had a newspaper route."

Apartments joke, Morris Schwartz is dying and on his deathbed.

Morning Jew

Morris Schwartz is on his deathbed, knows the end is near, is with his nurse, his wife, his daughter and 2 sons. "So", he says to them:

"Bernie, I want you to take the Beverly Hills houses."

"Sybil, take the apartments over in Los Angeles Plaza."

"Hymie, I want you to take the offices over in City Centre."

"Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings downtown."

The nurse is just blown away by all this, and as Morris slips away, she says , "Mrs. Schwartz, your husband must have been such a hard working man to have accumulated all this property".

Sarah replies, "Property? The schmuck had a paper round!"

A deeply in love boy says to his girlfriend ...

"I might not be rich, nor have any money or expensive apartments, and even not be the owner of many companies like my friend Jack, but i love you, and i always will"

She, hugging him tight and already crying answered :

" If you really love me, will you introduce me to your friend Jack please ? "


Some people passed away from toxic fumes in the apartments I constructed.

I was just making the ceilings asbestos I could.

For years I was addicted to the idea of building my own apartments.

The idea consumed me and I eventually developed a complex.

Apartments joke, For years I was addicted to the idea of building my own apartments.

I finally realized why many apartments have weird popcorn ceiling

I couldn't understand why every apartment I've lived in had those ugly pebbly popcorn ceilings. It was baffling.

But then later I learned it was a way to muffle sounds coming from your upstairs and downstairs neighbors. It was baffling!

A song about London apartments

Written in A flat.

What happens if you put two apartments together?

Togetherments, because they were "ment" to be together.

I was chatting to this extraordinarily attractive girl the other day...

"What do you do for a living?"' I asked her.

"Real estate, you know, selling houses, apartments etc, What do you have?" she replied.

"At the moment', I replied, "I just happen to have a semi".

You can explore apartments abundant reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean apartments rent dad jokes. There are also apartments puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


I've lived in apartments my whole life. In fact I'm seeing a therapist...

I think I have an apartment complex.

What do you call a dog kennel in San Francisco?

Luxury apartments

What do you call safe-sex apartments?

Condominiums.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the apartments outdoor jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working apartments homes piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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