Antivax Jokes
111 antivax jokes and hilarious antivax puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about antivax that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Antivax Short Jokes
Short antivax jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The antivax humour may include short virus jokes also.
- I shouldn't make jokes at the expense of my anti-vax neighbours so much... They tend to get offended by those hurtful little jabs
- What do schools and the anti-vax movement have in common? Both are raising the world's average IQ
- Today is my first cake day which means My Reddit account is older than most anti-vax kids will ever be.
- What's the worst thing to hear at an antivax rally? "He's having a heart attack! Is anyone here a doctor?"
- I told my ex to join the anti-vax community. Clearly, he needs to be surrounding by other people who don't last long.
- There are two things that never gets old 1. Jokes about antivaxers
2. Kids of antivaxers - What did the anti-vax kid wanna grow up to be? Alive
- Did you here about the anti-vaxer with legit scientific evidence? Yeah, me neither
- Did you hear the one about the anti-vax mom? Neither did her kid.
- You guys may not agree with me but I personally believe that anti-vax kids will make it to 20 2020 that is
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Antivax One Liners
Which antivax one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with antivax? I can suggest the ones about integration and vaccine.
- Why did the anti-vaxer refuse to go out with Batman? She was against masked-man dates.
- What do you call an anti-vax babysitter? Mrs. Doubt Pfizer
- I'm an antivax parent, I want to keep my 3 children healthy
- What do anti-vax kids and unfunny jokes have in common? They both die in new.
- I have a lot of anti-vax jokes In my family
- What do you call an antivaxer in the 1920s? Dead.
- What do antivax parents order at a bar? Anything but shots
- Why are jokes about anti-vax kids the best? They never get old!
- I'm a proud anti-vax mother of 4 beautiful children
- All of my jokes are anti-vaxer related They all die in new
- Why did the anti-vax movement stop? It died down.
- It's so nice to meet so many anti-vaxers here It feels like we're a dying breed
- A joke but only anti-vax kids get it. Polio
- I love hearing jokes about anti-vax kids They never get old.
- what do Anti-vax kids and Acids have in common? they don't go above 7
Uproarious Antivax Jokes to Share with Friends
What funny jokes about antivax you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fad jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make antivax pranks.
Only anti-vaxxers will get this
Measles
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why don't anti-vaxxers hang out in bars?
They're afraid of the shots.
Anti-vaxxers hate Lil John
He's always promoting shots.
So an anti-vaxxer tells me that vaccines cause autism.
So I reply "Oh, so you've gotten vaccinated, then?"
~~Sorry if it's a terrible joke.~~
No regrets
Anti-Vaxers are meeting today to change their name
After finally debating for awhile, they all agreed on Pro-Disease.
Two anti-vaxxers walked into a bar
And died of polio
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why are anti-vaxxers so terrible at painting and sculpture?
Because vaccines can cause you to be artistic.
Antivaxxers should create social media accounts for their children
They'll go viral in no time.
What's an anti-vaxxers favorite board game?
Sorry!
(You have diphtheria)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
dark Humour is like anti-vax families
There's usually a dead baby.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Anti-vaxers musty love comedy,
'cause they just get everything.
Why were the anti-vaxxing parents crying?
They found out autism is genetic
Why wouldn't the anti-vaxxers child eat his broccoli?
He's dead
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do anti-vaxxers celebrate their kid's sixth birthday?
They put flowers on their grave.
How is Anti-Vax children and middle school the same?
They only last three years
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Here's to antivaxxers...
The h**... players of the 10 year challenge.
How do anti-vaxx parents talk to their children?
Through a Ouija board
What do anti-vaxxers and Parents Against Alchohol have in common?
They don't want you giving shots to their kids.
What does one say to an anti-vaxx kid?
Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
omae wa
mou shindeiru.
Anti-vaxxers remind me of the show GLEE
Both haven't aged well
Anti-Vaxx parents hate it when you call their toddler's outbursts a "temper tantrum."
They prefer the term "mid-life crisis"
Why is halloween candy so similar to anti-vax kids?
Because both dont last very long
What do antivaxx kids and Trump have in common?
4 years or less.
An anti-vax mom is at a cashier
"you should give me a discount! It's my son's 3rd birthday", She says
The cashier then replied "in that case, I'll apply the senior discount"
I tried to talk to my anti-vax friend the other day
Unfortunately the Oijia board wasn't working
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Anti-vax jokes are like anti-vax kids,
They were great for a year or two, but they should be dead by now.
Why would antivaxxers make terrible bartenders?
They don't approve of shots.
I'm gonna die for what I believe in...
But I'm an atheist and antivax, so I'm pretty much immortal
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do Anti-Vaxxers and their children have in common?
They both stopped maturing at the same age.
Why don't antivaxxers go out drinking?
They are against having shots
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If you ever wanna have raw s**..., have it with an anti-vax believer
Worst case scenario, you pay child support for 5 years instead of 18
There's two things that will never get old
1 - Making fun of anti-vax parents
2 - Their kids
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An anti-vax mom walks in on her son self vaccinating.
And she says that better be h**... !
The anti-vaxx couple could not understand why their 2-year old was crying
Everyone cries when they go through a mid-life crisis, duh.
An anti-vax rally ended earlier today...
...Due to an outbreak of the measles
An Anti-vaxxer walks into a bar...
He stays sober and wants to go back home, but there's a bridge that comes in the way.
I tell him, "There is a 1 percent chance of the bridge breaking."
The anti-vaxxer jumped into the water and started swimming.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Top 5 anti-vax excuses, interpreted for gamers
Excuse #5: "I like to play life with the default biological settings".
Excuse #4: "I like to take my chances and play it on extreme difficulty, just like old school style."
Excuse #3: "Pay to win? Eww."
Excuse #2: "I'll rather die than pay for DLC."
Excuse #1: "I swear the update caused that c**...."
I don't think antivaxxers are such a big problem.
I was just walking through the subway when I saw 2 homeless people vaccinating themselves.
There are 3 types of people in the world: Glass half-full people, glass half-empty people,
And kids with antivax parents, who never live long enough to form an opinion
What do you get antivaxxer kids for their 3rd birthday?
Tombstone
The anti-vaxxer movement will end the same way that it started...
It'll go viral.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call an elementary school dropout?
An anti-vax child.
Did y'all hear about the Anti-vax kid who bought a Ferrari at the age of 2?
Yeah, it was his midlife crisis.
If you don't like anti-vaxxers...
Don't worry, they won't be here long
Why do anti-vaxxer still get shots for their pets?
They think it causes aww-tism.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An anti-vaxxer, an entitled woman, and a Karen walk into a bar
She demands to speak to the manager
An anti-vaxxer passes away...
...and finds herself in heaven. God himself greets her, shows her around and asks if she has any questions.
She says "Not about heaven, but was I right about vaccines?"
God laughed and said "No, vaccines are perfectly safe and should be administered to everyone".
The woman just can't believe it. She's absolutely distraught, until it finally dawns on her: this conspiracy must go even higher than I thought!"
An anti-vaxxer, an anti-masker, and a conspiracy theorist walk into a bar
The bartender looks up, groans to himself, pours himself a drink and asks "What'll it be Karen?"
What do dwarf and antivax advocates have in common?
\#ShortLivesMatter
What's the thing my memes and an antivax kid have in common?
They both die in new
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the anti-vaxxer cross the road
I don't know, go do your own research and stop bothering me!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What disease are anti-vax kids immune to?
Adulthood. I hope this isn't taken.
What do anti-vaxxers and 5g conspiracists have in common?
They both are afraid of improving cell service.
I saw an anti-vaxxers 4 year old son throwing a tantrum at the grocery store yesterday.
You can say he was having a midlife crisis
Only antivaxxers will get this...
Chicken pox.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Antivaxx kids are like dark humor
They never get old
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm an Anti-vax and I don't care what you think.
They are absolutely the worst brand of vacuum cleaner. Dyson all the way for me!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm an Anti-vax and I don't care what you think.
I'm sick and tired of seeing people who are anti-vax getting bullied on social media. We have good reasons to feel this way and simply bad mouthing us or attacking us is not going to change our mind. We will not be silenced.
I for sure will never have one again. No chance, no matter what you say to convince me. I've been s**... into that trap before!
They are absolutely the worst brand of vacuum cleaner. Dyson all the way for me!
Don't be an Anti-Vaxxer,
getting your Uncles vaccinated is just as important!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An anti-vaxxer got a call from the Doctor.
The doctor said "Your test results are in and I'm afraid it's not good news."
"Nonsense," replied the anti-vaxxer. "I don't trust your pharmaceutical industry. My entire life I relied on homeopathic remedies instead of medication, and the only diagnosis I accept is based on my horoscope."
"Fair enough, in that case tell me your star -sign." said the doctor.
The anti-vaxxer replied "My star sign is Cancer."
The doctor said "Well what a d**... coincidence..."
My anti-vaxx girlfriend asked me about trying to make a child together
Apparently, Let's give it a shot, then wasn't the best answer.
An anti-vaxxer is sitting at a bar.
He is a couple beers deep when the bartender shouts Free shots for the bar! On that man over there! And he points to a man the anti-vaxxer can't see.
The bartender then proceeds to walk down the bar pouring shots for each patron. When he gets to the anti-vaxxer, the man stops him from pouring the shot and says:
I have had quite a few beers tonight and I need to work tomorrow. I don't want to be hungover. How strong is the liquor?
Bartender: It's 100 proof.
Anti-vaxxer: That's too much proof for me. I'll skip the shot.
I don't like anti-vaxxers
They make me sick!
How many antivaxxers does it take to change a lightbulb?
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It's not my job to give you the answer. Do your own research.
How many anti-vaxxers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They're happy living in the dark
A year after historic protests...
white, anti-vax Republicans are finally saying I can't breathe .
How do you get an antivaxxer to shut up?
I've been here for over fourteen years, it's been all downhill for the last ten.
=
Why didn't the anti-vaxxer wear a seatbelt?
Because they didn't want to live in fear of car accidents.
