Anti Vaccine Jokes

54 anti vaccine jokes and hilarious anti vaccine puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about anti vaccine that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Anti Vaccine Short Jokes

Short anti vaccine jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The anti vaccine humour may include short vaccine jokes also.

  1. People give anti-vaxxers a hard time, but they gave us one important thing... A control group for our studies confirming that vaccines do not cause autism.
  2. There was an old scientist who invented an anti-Alzheimer's vaccine. Unfortunately, he forgot the formula.
  3. So an anti-vaxxer tells me that vaccines cause autism. So I reply "Oh, so you've gotten vaccinated, then?"
    ~~Sorry if it's a terrible joke.~~
    No regrets
  4. [OC] What is the one thing anti-vaxxers hate more than vaccines? Giving their child a long, healthy life
  5. I'm an anti vaccine activist, and didn't vaccinate my children. They're all dead, but at least they don't have autism!
  6. The percent of the population holding anti-vaccination beliefs has gotten up to the mid-teens. Unlike their children.
  7. Why are anti-vaxxers so terrible at painting and sculpture? Because vaccines can cause you to be artistic.
  8. Anti-Vaxers Who would win a race between a vaccinated 10 year old and an unvaccinated 10 year old?
    The vaccinated one because the other one doesn't exist.
  9. It's ironic... Most anti-vax mothers are actually vaccinated.
    Which, depending on what you believe, might explain their autism.
  10. Non-vaccinated children are the least likely to get any ear infections. Because they are anti-wax

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Anti Vaccine One Liners

Which anti vaccine one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with anti vaccine? I can suggest the ones about believes vaccines and covid vaccination.

  1. What's the difference between anti-vaxxers and vaccines? needle actually have a point.
  2. Anti vaccinated kids show no sign of autism Because autism isn't detected until age 3
  3. What do Pro-Vaxxers and Anti-Vaxxers have in common? They'll never be fully vaccinated.
  4. Why does the 2 year old child of the anti-vaccine parents cry? Midlife crisis.
  5. Don't be an Anti-Vaxxer, getting your Uncles vaccinated is just as important!
  6. Why did the Anti vaccinator leave the solar system? Because he found mercury in it.
  7. Why is a two year old anti-vacciner's son crying? He's having his midlife crisis
  8. I tried to tell a covid vaccine joke to some anti-vaxxers... But they didn't get it.
  9. How are an anti vaccine baby's 5th birthday and John Cena related? They will never see it
  10. I am getting real sick of these Anti-Vaxx memes But that's because I wasn't Vaccinated.
  11. What do anti-vaxers call a transformer that has been vaccinated? Autismus Prime
  12. Anti vaxx jokes allow dead baby jokes to live on. Unlike the non vaccinated kids.
  13. I really hate anti-vaxxers They must all have autism after being vaccinated
  14. There were once 2 anti-vaccine parents. They ain't parents no more
  15. What do me and anti-vaccination kids have in common? We both last 3 minutes.

Cheerful Fun Anti Vaccine Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy

What funny jokes about anti vaccine you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean unvaccinated kid jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make anti vaccine pranks.

Did you hear about the failed anti-amputation vaccine?

It worked fine, but it cost an arm and leg.....

I kind of understand where anti-vaxxers coming from.

They were surely vaccinated as children, and look how r**... they turned out to be.

Anti-Vaxxers keep pressuring me to not take my vaccines

It I'd say it's worth a shot.

I hear anti-vaxxers are sick of people telling jokes about them.

It's easy to get sick when you're vaccinated.

Anti-vaxxers are the biggest hypocrites. How?

They've been vaccinated. We know this because:
•They're over three years old
•They're r**....

What do 40 year old adults and 2 year old anti vaccine kids have in common?

A mid-life crisis.

If you are old enough to write articles on anti-vaccination

Your parents probably made the right choice, unfortunately it was on you.

Anti vax mom goes to the doctor

An anti Vax mom takes her newborn son to the doctor. The doctor says, "you should really consider getting him vaccinated, if you love your child."
The mother is furious. She says, "do you even know what they put in those needles!"
To which the doctor replies, "Vaccines?"

An anti-vax mom walks in on her son self vaccinating.

And she says that better be h**... !

An anti-vaxxer passes away...

...and finds herself in heaven. God himself greets her, shows her around and asks if she has any questions.
She says "Not about heaven, but was I right about vaccines?"
God laughed and said "No, vaccines are perfectly safe and should be administered to everyone".
The woman just can't believe it. She's absolutely distraught, until it finally dawns on her: this conspiracy must go even higher than I thought!"

I am a proud anti-vaccine Father of 3.

Edit- Two Now
2nd Edit- One Now
3rd Edit- Nevermind
4th Edit- WOW this really blew up. I would like to dedicate all these wonderful awards to my 3 children Byeson, Dieanne, and Ammunity. They would have been so proud. RIP

Tetanus isn't actually caused by rusty objects, but by bacteria in dirt, which we often associate with rusty nails and tools that can introduce the bacteria through wounds.

This is why tetanus vaccines are so important. For anti-vaxxers, that truth could be hard to s**....
Any appreciation for lockjaw puns?

So I got my first covid vaccine shot today

Afterwards, I ran into a friend and told him about it.
He replied: Huh, you took the vaccine shot?
Me: Uhm yes, why wouldn't I?
Him: I thought you were an anti-vaxxer?
Me: What, no. Why would you think that?
Him: Well most morons are...

After dying the anti-vaxxer meets God. "God, please tell me who is behind the conspiracy to give people autism with vaccines?"

"Nobody," says God. "There is no conspiracy, and vaccines do no cause autism."