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Ant Jokes

107 ant jokes and hilarious ant puns to laugh out loud. Read animal jokes about ant that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Fed up with the same old jokes? Make your friends and family laugh with these hilarious ant jokes, featuring funny comparisons to elephants, wasps, termites and more.

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Funniest Ant Short Jokes

Short ant jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ant humour may include short wasp jokes also.

  1. You can tell the gender of an ant by dropping it in water. If it sinks it's girl ant, If it floats it's boy ant.
  2. My granddaughter just hit me with this one: what is the biggest kind of ant ? A gi-ant!
    I am so proud right now!
  3. Did you know you can tell the gender of an ant by throwing it in water? If it sinks, girl ant. If it floats, buoyant.
  4. All groups of animals have unique names: a gaggle of geese, a pod of whales, a colony of ants… so what do you call a group of Karens? An HOA
  5. science fact - did you know you can find the gender of an ant by putting it in water? If it sinks, girl ant.
    If it floats, buoyant.
  6. Did you know that you can tell how smart an ant is by catching it on fire? If it burns, it's a smart ant.
    If it doesn't, it's retardant.
  7. How can you tell an ant's gender? 1. Get a glass full of water
    2. Throw the ant into the glass
    3. If it sinks, it's girl ant
    4. If it floats, it's boy ant
  8. How does an ant put on a tie? With a considerable deal of practice and skill and the correct combination of knots in the tie so it can properly be secured on the neck. It's an ant-tie joke.
  9. Went to the hardware store today... I picked up a can of insecticide and asked the guy behind the counter if this was good for ants.
    Old man says "nope, it'll kill em"
  10. I used to hang out with a guy who crossbred insects... But I got sick of his crazy ant ticks.

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Ant One Liners

Which ant one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ant? I can suggest the ones about termite and cockroach.

  1. How come ants don't get sick? ...because they have lil' anty-bodies
    *runs away*
  2. How many ants does it take to rent a house? Ten ants
  3. Why don't ants get sick? Because they have little anty-bodies
  4. Why don't The Ants catch COVID? They've got little Antibodies.
  5. What do you get if you give growth hormones to an ant? Tolerance
  6. Why were the ants unaffected by the covid virus? They have lil anty bodies.
  7. How many ants does it take to fill an apartment Tenants
  8. all ants are female because if they were male, they would be called uncles
  9. What's worse than 10 ants in your pants? One uncle.
  10. How many ants are needed to fill an apartment? Ten-ants
  11. What do you call an old ant? An antique
  12. How many ants does it take to fill an apartment building? Ten ants.
  13. What do you call a group of rebellious ants? Protestants
  14. What is worse than ants in your pants? ......... Uncles.
  15. Why did Antman stop talking when he joined the x men?? He became a mute ant.

Ant & Elephant Jokes

Here is a list of funny ant & elephant jokes and even better ant & elephant puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • If it's not about elephants, it's irrelephant. But what if it's about ants? Pertinant.
  • What's winning attitude? 3 ants saw an elephant coming.
    Ant1: We will kill him
    Ant2: We will break his legs
    Ant3: Forgive him guys, he's alone and we're three
  • Which ant is the biggest? Elephant
  • Once an elephant and an ant walks into a bar. And the ant got crushed under the elephant's feet.
  • How do you make an ant huge Add "eleph"
  • What the definition of determination? A ant crawling up an elephant's leg with r**... on his mind.....

Great Ant Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends

What funny jokes about ant you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean insect jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ant pranks.

You can tell the s**... of an ant by dropping it in water.

If they float, they're boy-ant.

How do you tell the difference between a boy ant and a girl ant?

Drop the ant in a glass of water. If it sinks, it's a girl ant.
If it floats, it's buoyant.

How to tell ant gender

Put the ant in water and if it sinks, it's a girl ant. If it floats, boy ant.

Whenever an ant gets injured, instead of helping, the rest of the colony just leaves it to die. It's like the old saying goes:

If an ant broke, dont fix it

You can determine the gender of an ant by throwing it in a puddle of water

If it sinks it's a girl ant, but if it floats it's a boy ant

Ant Man?

Why don't they just call him uncle?

Leading entomologists experimenting with ant larvae have reported that while the introduction of milk-born disaccharides increased their height by 31%, it also inhibited tarsus growth by 47%.

The study concluded that the resulting specimens lack toes in taller ants.

Recently, a group of scientists discovered...

a subclass of ant has a genetic mutation that makes them grow larger than average, DESPITE missing a jointed segment on their legs. This same mutation also causes them to have an aversion to dairy-based foods, even with their high based sugar content.
TL;DR lack-toes-in-taller-ants

An ant walks into this Reddit sub.

The bar is set really low here.

How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.

What do you call the an ant in a colony who is responsible for establishing incoming trade deals with other ant colonies?

Import-ant

My ant farm has 9 ants.

One more and I'll have to start collecting rent.

Chillin'

While you are reading jokes on reddit, I am sitting here in a chair that costs $2,000, hugging a stuffed animal that costs $150 and watching the Ant Man Quantumania movie on a 100" full HD 8k TV that costs $8,000 and nothing bothers me, not even the look of the furniture store employees who apparently want me to leave the store.

What type of an ant can count?

An accountANT

What did the pink panther say when he stepped on an ant?

Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant dead ant dead ant...

Do you know how you can find out the gender of an ant?

If you put it in the water and the ant sinks, it's a girl ant. However if it doesn't sink, it's buoyant.

Today I was so bored that I put a bit of sugar right in front of an ant.

The ant spent some good minutes eating the sugar, as it left to call his other ant friends, I cleaned it up so they would think she's lying.

My inappropriate uncle told me this one when I was 11: Where do cousins come from?

ant holes

How do you tell the s**... of an ant?

If it floats, it's a boy-ant.

What do you call a fire ant with severe learning disabilities?

A fire retardant.

What do you call an ant from overseas?

Important

What did the pink panther say when he stepped on an ant?

Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant

Why did the ant crawl up Princess Kate's stocking?

To go to the grand opening.
Why did the ant crawl up Prince Williams' trousers?
To get to the royal ball.

How do you know if an ant is male or female?

Put it in water. If it sinks it's female. If it floats it's buoy-ant.

10 ants were looking for a new place to live...

The 1 ant, 2 ant, and 3 ant bought houses in the country.
The 4 ant, 5 ant, and 6 ant bought houses in the city.
The 7 ant, 8 ant, and 9 ant bought houses at the beach.
The 10 ant decided to rent.

How do you tell if an ant is a boy or a girl?

They're all girls, otherwise they'd be uncles

I bought an ant farm.

I don't know where I'm gonna find a tractor that small.

A man walks into a tiny hardware store

looking for something to rid of a wasp problem. After 10 mins of walking around the store all he can find is ant spray. So he goes up to the counter and asks the clerk, Is this any good for wasps? Without a word, the clerk takes the can from his hands, reads the back for ingredients. No. he replied, That'll kill them.

If you dropped a male and a female ant into water, which one survives?

The male, because it is bouyant

What do you call an ant that's been shunned by his community?

Socially dist-ant

An ant walks into a bar with his good friend Mister No, who is not an ant.

The bartender says, "I'm sorry. We only serve ants here."
The ant says, "But this is my good friend Mister No."
The bartender says, "Sorry, but I don't take No for an ant, sir."

The discriminatory ant colony banished all ants over 4 mm tall

They had no taller ants

How do you tell if it's a girl ant or a boy ant?

Put the ant in the water...
If it sinks, it's a girl ant
If it floats, it's a buoyant!

How can you tell the gender of an ant?

Easy, drop it in water.
If it sinks: girl ant
If it floats:

What's the difference between writing your will and owning an ant farm?

One's a legacy, the other a sea of legs.

How to determine the s**... of an ant…

Drop the ant in water. If it sinks it's a female. If not, it's buoyant.

How can you tell if an ant is male or female?

They're all females, otherwise they'd be uncles.

How do you tell if an ant is a boy or a girl ?

You put it in water. If it sinks, it's a girl ant. If it floats, it's buoyant.
Bye...I'm leaving rn.....

How do you tell the s**... of an ant?

You drop it in water.
If it sinks, Girl ant.
If it floats...

How can you tell the gender of an ant?

You put them in water. If it floats, then it's buoyant.

What do you call an ant who trades with other ant colonies for resources?

Import-ant

What did the mouse say the ant crossing the street?

Hello, fellow road-ant

what do you get when you cross a rabbit and an ant?

Bugs Bunny.

What do you call a confident and stylish young fire ant?

Flamboyant

Why do ant colonies never get sick?

They're full of anty-bodies!

I had a chance to buy an ant that had been on a recent trip to the ISS...

But it was too exorbitant for an ex-orbit ant.

What's the difference between a superhero and an ant that cannot speak?

Nothing, both are mutants.

How do you pronounce "Aunt"?

"Ont", "Ant", or "Goldnt"?

Why was the ant confused?

Because all his uncles were also ants.

Why did Professor X take on an insect as a student when it couldn't talk?

Because it was a mute ant.

Why wife keeps telling me to stop singing "stand and deliver" every day because it's too dated and 80s.

I refused. I was Adam ant.

Why does a girl ant sink in water?

Because she's not buoyant.

How do you tell apart a girl ant and a boy ant?

the girl ant will sink
^the ^boy ^ant ^will ^float

A kid asked his mom : how did you make me ?

His mom said : one night i put little sugar under my pillow and in the morning you were by my side; The kid grabbed some sugar and put it under his pillow, he woke up in the morning and found an ant in his bed, "If you weren't my son, I swear i would've squashed you!"

The other day I met a sentient ant who grew fond of me. It turns out he has the ability to type and write as well…

This looks like it's all a cake day joke, but it's just fondant.

What do you call a glowing ant?

A Radi-Ant .

What is the difference between a non vaccinated child and a fire ant?

A fire ant can live up to 6 years

The Ant, and Spider,were hanging at the millipede's house...

They ran out of Booze. So being a good host, the Millipede volunteered to get more at the store.
Waited for 2 hours and the millipede was nowhere to be found.
They opened the front door and saw the Millipede was still putting on his shoes ..

What do you call a genetically altered picnic pest that can't speak?

A mute ant

What do you call a huge ant?

Gi-ant

Not your dairy insect

An ant was walking around when it found a 5inch ant of his very same species:
- Why are youso big, it asked
- I drink a lot of milk
"Lactose in taller ant"

You can tell a gender of an ant by placing it in water.

If it drowns its a girl ant, and if it floats its a buoyant.

How can you tell the s**... of an ant?

Throw it into a pool. If it sinks, it is a girl ant. If it floats, then it is a "BUOYANT".

How can you tell an ant is a boy or girl?

Throw it in water
If it sinks = girl ant
If it floats = buoyant

What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant?

Dead ant. Dead ant. Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead annnnnnnnttt.

What's tinier than a teeny w**... ant?

An ant's teeny w**....

Did you hear Ant Man will be in Captain America 3?

I hear it will be a small role

I just read that a single ant can live to be 29 years old.

Anyone know how long the married ones live up to?

What do you call a five-legged ant?

A pendant....

Why did the girl ant drown?

Because she was not buoyant.

A fruit, an insect, and a Chinese surname walk into a bar.

Well, a pear, ant, lee.

jokes about ant