Announcer Jokes

41 announcer jokes and hilarious announcer puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about announcer that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article is a compilation of jokes from bingo, rodeo, football, and baseball announcers. Read these funny jokes from some of the best announcers around, including the famous Westminster youngman and football coach.

Funniest Announcer Short Jokes

Short announcer jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The announcer humour may include short announces jokes also.

  1. As we landed in Saudi Arabia the pilot announced "Ladies and Gentlemen don't forget to adjust your watches to local time" I thought to myself how do I turn it back to the 7th century?
  2. Every morning at breakfast for the past 6 months, I announce loudly to my family that I'm going for a jog, and then I don't. It's my longest running joke of the year.
  3. The UK Prime Minister just announced her resignation. This is not surprising. It is the end of May, after all.
  4. I love dad jokes WIFE: I have a couple of important announcements... First: I'm pregnant.
    HUSBAND: Hi Pregnant, I'm dad
    WIFE: Second: No you're not
  5. President Biden has announced water is now only legal in three states. Solid, liquid and gas.
  6. Justin Timberlake announces that he will be joining the war in Ukrain. Early reports suggest that he will be stationed somewhere along the Crimea river
  7. I'm pleased to announce Reddit has achieved its goal in becoming one of the top 10 green companies in the world! The front page is now made up of over 90% recycled content
  8. If you find $60-80 to be too expensive for ancestry DNA kits, I have a cheap alternative... Announce that you won the lottery and you'll quickly find relatives you never knew you had!
  9. Donald Trump has announced that he plan to extend his wall across the oceans... This news came after he discovered that a man named Jesus managed to walk on water.
  10. A Russian named Rudolf woke up one morning He looked out the window and announced, _"It's raining."_
    His wife said, _"No dear, it's sleeting."_
    He replied, _"Rudolf the Red knows rain, dear."_

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Announcer One Liners

Which announcer one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with announcer? I can suggest the ones about reporter and presenter.

  1. What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas? COOOAAAALLL!!!
  2. Why do golf announcers whisper? Because they don't want to wake up the people watching.
  3. ALDI grocery stores have announced their new store brand peanuts. ALDI's nuts
  4. Tide announced the new motto for their pods line. Cleaning the gene pool since 2017.
  5. QAnon has announced a beauty pageant The winner will be crowned Miss Information
  6. Demi Lovato announced they are non-binary today Congratulations Themi Lovato!
  7. They recently announced the title for Fast and furious 10 Fast 10:your seatbelts
  8. Apple Stock Apple's stock surges on announcement of two-child policy change in China
  9. My government recently announced they're phasing out Roman numerals... Not on my watch.
  10. A scientist announced he managed to cool something down to absolute zero. It was 0K.
  11. Apple just announced their next groundbreaking product The iShovel
  12. Walmart announced the closing of 175 stores in 2018 Putting 12 cashiers out of work
  13. The white Xbox One S was just announced. Of course it's 40% smaller than the black one.
  14. What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas? COOOOOAAAAALLLLLLLLL
  15. covid pi has just been announced I feel we are going around in circles.

Feet Announcer Jokes

Here is a list of funny feet announcer jokes and even better feet announcer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I'm proud to announce I have stuck to my New Years Resolution and did not bite my nails the entire month of January. My feet have never looked better.
  • After a long emotional struggle, my three feet tall uncle finally announced that he is gay. I'm glad that he decided to come out of the cabinet.

Football Announcer Jokes

Here is a list of funny football announcer jokes and even better football announcer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Tom Brady just announced that he was retiring from football for good. That's a relief because if he was retiring for evil, then evil would probably win.
  • England football manager Roy Hodgson has just announced that he's won the competition for "Scotland's favourite Englishman."
Announcer joke, England football manager Roy Hodgson has just announced that he's won the competition for

Baseball Announcer Jokes

Here is a list of funny baseball announcer jokes and even better baseball announcer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A baseball walks into Wimbledon. The announcer yells "Hey, we don't serve your kind"
Announcer joke, A baseball walks into Wimbledon.

Experience Good Cheer with Hilarious Announcer Jokes and Friends

What funny jokes about announcer you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean commentator jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make announcer pranks.

On day six of the Creation, God announced to his archangel underlings, "Today we're creating a place called Canada.

"Today we're creating a place called Canada. Pull out all the stops. Give it beautiful mountains, lakes, plains, forests, and sandy beaches. Underground, give it oil, gold, etc. Oh, and plenty of fish and wildlife."
"Sir," interjected an archangel, "aren't you being overly generous to these Canadians?"
"Don't worry, I'll balance it out," said God. "Wait 'till you see the neighbours I'm giving them."

(True joke) In 1960, after winning his olympic gold medal, Muhammad Ali went to eat at a fancy downtown resteraunt.

When the waiter came over Ali asked for a cheeseburger.
Shocked to see a black man sitting in the resteraunt, the waiter announced "We don't serve n**...".
Ali: "Well I don't eat them either, just give me my d**... cheeseburger".

Boris Johnson, Justin Trudeau and Emmanuel Macron at NATO meeting joking about Trump:

Macron: Is that why he was late?
Trudeau: He was late because he takes a 40-minute press conference off the top !
Trudeau: Oh, yeah, yeah yeah. He announced ...

A cat owner invited their neighbor over for dinner and introduced their four cats. "That's Alogue, Aract, Erpillar, and Astrophe," they announced. The neighbor was surprised and asked, Where on Earth did you get those names?

Oh, those are their last names, the owner said. Their first names are Cat.

Two engineers were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking at its top. A blonde walked by and asked what they were doing.

"We're supposed to find the height of this flagpole," said Sven, "but we don't have a ladder."
The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a couple of bolts, and laid the pole down on the ground. Then she took a tape measure from her handbag, took a measurement and announced, "Twenty one feet, six inches," and walked away.
One engineer shook his head and laughed, "Typical blonde! We ask for the height and she gives us the length!"

Three dinosaurs are running across the desert when they stumble across a magic lamp.

They rub it, and a genie appears.
"I have three wishes, so I'll give one to each of you," the genie announces.
The first dinosaur thinks hard.
"Alright," he says, "I'll have a big, juicy, piece of meat."
Instantly, the biggest, juiciest piece of meat he'd ever seen appears in front of him.
Not to be outdone, the second dinosaur thinks even harder.
"I know! I'll have a shower of meat!"
Immediately, huge pieces of meat rain down around him.
The third dinosaur, certainly not to be outdone, thinks harder than the previous dinosaurs.
"I've got it!" he cries, "I want a MEATIER shower!"

Bill pulled up a stool at his favorite bar and announced...

My wife Suzie must love me more than any woman has ever loved any man!
What makes you say that? the bartender inquired.
Last week, Bill explained, I had to take a couple of sick days from work. Suzie was so thrilled to have me around that every time the milkman or mailman came by, she'd run down the driveway waving her arms and hollering, 'My husband's home! My husband's home!'


A gal walks into a bar and orders a bottle of wine. After she downs most of the bottle she tries to get the bartender's attention. "I used to be grapes!" she announces loudly. "What?" the confused bartender asks. "I'm sorry," she apologizes. "That must have been the wine talking."

In 1999, in the midst of the Y2K panic, the k**... Jelly company announced it was now Y2K compliant:

Known as 'Y2KY Jelly, it now allowed you to put all four digits in your date

The best in town!

Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to the counter, and points at the guy in the middle, shouting, "Your mom's the best s**... in town!" Everyone expects a fight, but the guy ignores him, so the drunk wanders off and bellies up to the bar at the far end. Ten minutes later, the drunk comes back, points at the same guy, and says, "I just did your mom, and it was sw-eeeeet!" Again, the guy refuses to take the bait, and the drunk goes back to the far end of the bar. Ten minutes later, he comes back and announces, "Your mom liked it!" Finally, the guy interrupts. "Go home, dad, you're drunk.

Announcer joke, A Russian named Rudolf woke up one morning