Laughable Anne Marie Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles
Three nuns
Sisters Anne, Mary, and Teresa are driving across the country when they are in a car c**... and all die tragically.
In heaven, the three of them are standing in front of the pearly gates and St. Peter is standing before them. He says to them, "Sisters, I understand that you are all women of faith, and I would be more than happy to let you into heaven without hesitation, but as it is the rules, I must ask you each one question that you must answer correctly before I can let you enter"
The nuns all agree and Sister Anne steps forward first.
"Sister Anne, what was the name of the first man?"
She barely misses a beat before announcing happily "Adam!"
*Gong!*
The gates open and she enters.
Sister Mary then steps forward and St. Peter asks her, "Sister Mary, what is the name of the first woman?"
"Eve!"
*Gong!*
The gates open and Sister Mary enters heaven.
St. Peter then addresses Sister Teresa, "Teresa, what is the first thing that Eve said when she saw Adam?"
Sister Teresa thinks for a minute... two minutes... three minutes.. then mutters to herself "That's a hard one..."
*Gong!*
Confession
Matthew goes into a confessional box and says "Bless me father for I have sinned, I have been with a loose woman."
The Priest says "is that you Matthew?"
"Yes father, it is I."
"Who was the woman you were with?"
"I cannot tell you for I do not wish to sully her reputation."
The priest asks "Was it Brenda O'Malley?"
"No father."
"Was it Fiona MacDonald?"
"No father."
"Was it Ann Brown?"
"No father, I cannot tell you."
The priest says "I admire your perseverance but you must atone for your sins. Your penance will be five Our Fathers and four Hail Marys."
Matthew goes back to his pew and his buddy Sean slides over and asks "What did you get?" Matthew replies "I got five Our Fathers, four Hail Marys and three good leads."
r**... husband and wife are smuggling a couple skunks across the border.
As they approach the border checkpoint the wife panics..."what do I do with these?!" she exclaims while frantically fumbling the skunks
"Quick now Mary Ann, hide them under your skirt!" said the red-neck husband in between his beer c**....
"Now, now whattabout the gadaym stink?!" says Mary Ann...
"If they die, they die hunnycakes"
One day in class, the math teacher Mrs. Brown noticed that Little Johnny was not paying attention to what she was saying...
So she called Little Johnny to recite in class.
"Little Johnny, answer this math question," she said. "If you have 500 dollars and you gave 100 dollars to Susie and gave 100 dollars to Jeannie and gave 100 dollars to Mary Ann, what do you have ?"
"An o**...," answered Little Johnny.
On the immigration debate, Donald Trump said of other countries: "They're not sending us their best people."
On a side note, Mary Anne MacLeod illegally migrated to the US in 1929. A few years later she gave birth to Donald Trump.
So he may have a point.
