The Best 85 Anne Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Anne jokes. There are some anne minetti jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these anne annie puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Anne Jokes and Puns
I've never understood how the Nazis couldn't find where Anne Frank was hiding
I've been to Amsterdam... There are signs pointing to her house everywhere.
What is brown and sits in a toilet in a dutch attic?
The diarrhea of Anne Frank.
How did Anne Frank's parents punish her?
They stuck a plunger in the toilet.
Why didn't Anne Frank have any kids?
The plunger went all the way through.
...she fainted.
Three nuns
Sisters Anne, Mary, and Teresa are driving across the country when they are in a car crash and all die tragically.
In heaven, the three of them are standing in front of the pearly gates and St. Peter is standing before them. He says to them, "Sisters, I understand that you are all women of faith, and I would be more than happy to let you into heaven without hesitation, but as it is the rules, I must ask you each one question that you must answer correctly before I can let you enter"
The nuns all agree and Sister Anne steps forward first.
"Sister Anne, what was the name of the first man?"
She barely misses a beat before announcing happily "Adam!"
*Gong!*
The gates open and she enters.
Sister Mary then steps forward and St. Peter asks her, "Sister Mary, what is the name of the first woman?"
"Eve!"
*Gong!*
The gates open and Sister Mary enters heaven.
St. Peter then addresses Sister Teresa, "Teresa, what is the first thing that Eve said when she saw Adam?"
Sister Teresa thinks for a minute... two minutes... three minutes.. then mutters to herself "That's a hard one..."
*Gong!*
Where do otters come from?
Otter space.
[credit goes to Anne Carson, or wherever she heard it]
What's the most useless thing ever?
Anne Frank's drum kit.
What's brown and runs in the attic?
The Diarrhea of Anne Frank
Anne Frank showed a cunning and resolve that any Jew would have been proud of.
Two years rent free.
I feel sorry for Anne Frank...
First she gets her diary published, which is every girl's worst nightmare, but on top of that she doesn't get any money from it, which is every Jew's worst nightmare.
Holocaust humor...
...I really do not find it very funny, Anne Frankly you shouldn't either!
[NSFW] Anne recently noticed she had hair growing between her legs...
Frantic, she asks her mom what's going on.
Her mother replies, "Don't worry sweetie, the part where the hair grows is called the Monkey. Be proud that your Monkey is growing hair."
The girl sighs in relief, and later at the dinner table she smiled and told her older sister Beth, "I've got hair growing on my Monkey."
The sister laughs and replies back, "That's nothing, mine is already eating bananas."
You can explore anne cathy reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean anne sullivan dad jokes. There are also anne puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Anne Frank's famous last words.
Brb, door
What are nazi's least favorite kind of hotdog?
Anne Franks
There was a pub quiz last week
And there was a round on Literature. The question was "Name the book where the characters all lived behind a wardrobe". Imagine the disgust when I shouted "The diary of Anne Frank"!
My new favorite drink is called
The Daiquiri of Anne Frank.
I feel bad for Anne Frank
She had her diary published for all the world to read, which is every girl's worst nightmare!
And she didn't get paid for it, which is every Jew's worst nightmare.
I'm sick and tired of hearing Jew jokes!
Anne Frankly, none of them are even that good.
Which book has the worst cliffhanger?
Anne Frank's Diary
Too bad Anne Frank never watched Home Alone.
She could have learned how to defeat the nazis.
Why did Raggedy Anne get kicked out of the toybox?
She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face and screaming "Lie to me! Lie to me!!!"
What smelled so bad it almost cost a young girl her life?
Anne Frank's diarrhea.
How does a pedophile travel into town?
In his little niece Anne.
On a scale of Anne Frank to Osama Bin Laden, how good was my hiding spot?
What did Shakespeare say when asked how his wife keeps things interesting?
"Anne hath a way."
I got a book for Hanukkah today
It was the diary of Anne Frank
Anyone else like the holidays of other cultures? Like, I love the one where you take a bunch of presents and hide them in the attic.
Or as you may know it, Anne Frank's birthday.
I'm not saying you're a jackass but...
You're the kind of guy who would buy Anne Frank a drum set.
I want to start a kosher hotdog company
And call it Anne Franks...
Grammar Nazis really make me fuhrious.
I'm sorry. That joke was really out of mein kampfort zone.
Anne Frankly, it was just bad.
What's Jewish and runs?
The Diarrhea of Anne Frank
You know what I hate about attics? How dark they are.
Anne frankly, they're a terrible hiding place.
What do Anne Frank and Bin Laden have in common?
They're both hide and seek champions!
What's a Jew's favorite brand of hotdog?
Anne Frank's
There's a lot of lame holocaust jokes on this thread...
Anne frankly, I'm getting sick and tired of them.
So I heard they're demolishing Hitlers house
Anne Frankly, I'm surprised they didn't do it already. I hope they step on the gas and burn the place down.
Amsterdam, 26 October1942, about tea time.
Mr Frank - "Shhhh Quiet everybody ... the Germans are coming".
Anne Frank - "I am too"
How did Henry VIIIs wife enter the room?
Amble in
(Anne Boyeyn)
I made this joke up and am very proud of it :)
Who was the famous writer, that died in WWII?
I don't know Anne Frankly I don't care.
What did the biologist name his daughter?
Anne Atomy
Too bad Anne Frank never watched Home Alone.
It could have been a real game changer.
Guys.. Seriously Jew jokes aren't funny.
Anne Frankly They're childish and offensive
Why did Germany almost go bankrupt?
Because the Holo-cost a lot of money. Anne Frankly, it wasn't worth it.
A recently discovered European WWII era manuscript tells the story of a young Jewish girl who often had liquidy bowel movements.
It's called *"The Diarrhea of Anne Frank."*
Did you hear about the chain of German restaurants opening up this year?
They're going to be serving Sausages, Brats, Anne Franks.
When Anne has a will...
Anne Hathaway
Holocaust jokes are...
out of Mein Kamf-ort zone, Anne Frank-ly I find them offensive.
Why did Anne Frank go to camp?
To get baked
Have you met my friend Katherine Anne Porter Stout?
Her parents are alcoholic.
My Internet Service Provider is called Hathway....
Their customer service executive called, it was a woman. I asked if her first name is Anne, we laughed and now I have no internet.
I've heard about a girl called Anne Frank...
Anne Frankly, I can't believe she died that early into her life.
What's a geologist's favourite Police song?
Rocks Anne!
You're as useless as...
Anne Frank's drumset
What was Henry VIII's favorite sport?
Anne Bowlin'
It's not the gift, but the thought that counts
So how does getting Anne Frank a drum set for her birthday stack up?
How do you make Helen Keller's drumset even more useless?
Give it to Anne Frank.
You're about as useful as...
Anne Frank's drumkit
You're about as useful as...
Anne Frank's drum set.
You will never guess what I found in my attic bathroom...
The diarrhea of Anne Frank
The actress who played the lead role in the local theatre production of Anne Frank's Diary was so bad
That the scene where the Nazis entered the stage and said "where is she" the audience shouted "she's in the attic".
What's a vampire's favorite kind of soup?
Chicken Anne Rice
I don't know why people are so shocked Anne Frank wrote down her thoughts about sex
It's not like she was trapped in the closet after all.
What was the last cooking implement used by Anne Frank?
A Dutch Oven
Did you hear the one about the firedog getting rebuked by a Raggedy Anne?
You know what they say. Dalmatian.
On the immigration debate, Donald Trump said of other countries: "They're not sending us their best people."
On a side note, Mary Anne MacLeod illegally migrated to the US in 1929. A few years later she gave birth to Donald Trump.
So he may have a point.
What was Anne Frank's least favorite letter?
Not Z!
A mugger held a couple.
While pointing a gun and taking their valuables, he asked the them:
Mugger: What's your name?
Woman: My name is Donna.
Mugger: You have a name like my mother. I will not kill you then. And you? (Asking the other)
Man: My name is Dave, but my friends call me Anne.
Meanwhile at a catholic church...
We pray you Saint Anne...
The devil appears: Oh, it's you guys again. For Pete's sake stop calling me if you don't mean it and at least pronounce my name right.
(Made this up myself, still giggling...)
Who's the best hide and go seek player
Anne Frank
who is.the master of hide and seek?
Anne frank
Henry Tudor just tweeted....
....that the beheading of Anne Boleyn was an interrogation gone wrong.
Why did Anne Frank only write one book?
She had concentration problems
I found an old game.
Anne Frank simulator, looked okayish (as good as an attic can look) and had decent sound. Although the game has a big bug. During the tutorial everytime I jump I get shot.
What do you call a women that works in telecommunications?
Anne Tenna
You know what? Jokes about Jews aren't funny.
Anne Frankly, I won't stand for them.
What's the difference between being gay and being Anne Frank?
One comes out of the closet, the other comes out of the chimney
Have you heard about the new film from the lead actress in "The Devil Wears Prada", about assuring people with lisps that they're perfectly normal?
Anne Hathaway with wordths
A catholic priest was praying Saint Anne.
The devil appears: Whazzzzup homie, why you pronounce my name so funny?
Holocaust jokes arent funny
anne frankly, I think they're tasteless.
I don't like holocaust jokes
They're usually unoriginal, Anne Frankly, I don't find them funny.
My buddy Frank is a HUGE fan of diarrhea. I was thinking of writing a book about him, but it looks like the title is already taken.
"The Diary of Anne Frank"
Many people ask, Was Anne Frank gay?
Yeah, she was in the closet.
Anne Frank, Michael Jackson, and Helen Keller walk into a bar...
Just kidding they're all dead.
Holocaust jokes are not funny
Anne frankly, im getting quite sick of them
You know, I bet that actress from The Devil Wears Prada could do anything she puts her mind to.
Where Anne Hathawill,
Anne Hathaway.
I don't like holocaust jokes
Anne Frankley I won't stand for them
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the anne peggy jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working anne eliza piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.