Animal Bad Jokes
34 animal bad jokes and hilarious animal bad puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about animal bad that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Animal Bad Short Jokes
Short animal bad jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The animal bad humour may include short bad animal jokes also.
- My employer has recently started testing their products on animals. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if I didn't work for a hammer factory.
- I bought my daughter some stuffed animals for her birthday. In hindsight, getting them at the taxidermist was probably a bad idea.
- I traded five of my rolex wathces for a ballon animal... It really was a waste of time.
(Sorry for any bad english and what not, nord typing) - A man asks his friend to stop telling animal puns. His friend says "Sorry, it's a bad rabbit I have."
- Why are animals so primitive? They don't want to ever reach a petabyte.
^((Haha PETA bad)) - I went to the zoo the other day... It was just a really bad zoo overall, just a run down old place. It had only animal too, a dog.
It was a shih tzu. - Things are so bad in Venezuela that people are eating zoo animals. The only restaurant still open is Buffalo Wild Things.
- Flying illegally in the animal carriage are really comfortable in a way. Bad side? There're no toilet. Good side? They don't question the smell.
- What is the difference between a crazy bunny and a counterfeit banknote?
One is bad money and the other is a mad bunny.
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Animal Bad One Liners
Which animal bad one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with animal bad? I can suggest the ones about kid animal and animal sounds.
- People tell me filling animals with helium is bad.. But i say whatever floats your goat.
- Why are cats, bad storytellers? Because they only have one tale.
- Yo mama cooking so bad, the flies chipped for a screen door!
- Why was the racehorse named Bad News?
Because bad news travels fast! - What do you get if you cross a cow with a tension headache?
A bad mood. - Why are pigs so bad at soccer? They are always hogging the ball!
- Chuck Norris scares cows so bad, milk comes out their nose.
- Red meat is not bad for you. Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.
- What magazine does the big bad wolf read.
Porks Illustrated
Animal Bad Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about animal bad you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean animal sound jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make animal bad pranks.
Have you heard of this bad doctor?
When people's limbs get cut off he replaces them, but with other animals' limbs.
One of his patients was really angry at this, and decided to call the doctor. After multiple profanities the patient said that if he finds the doctor he will kill him with his bear hands.
At the company meeting, one of the managers came up with an idea.
- I think we should stop testing our products on animals, it's giving our brand a bad rep.
The CEO says:
- How come? The shampoo companies do it all the time!
- I understand, but, sir, we sell hammers.
The big bad wolf converted to Buddhism and there was finally peace in the forest. But suddenly, the air was filled with screams of t**...! A bear asked the animals running past him, "What's happening now?!"
"The big bad wolf!" a goat shouted. "Is meditating!"
"So? Isn't that a good thing? questioned the bear.
"Noooo!" the goat bleated. "It's become aware wolf!"
The class teacher asks students to name an animal that begins with an E.
One boy says: Elephant.
Then the teacher asks for an animal that begins with a T.
The same boys says: Two elephants.
The teacher sends the boy out of the class for bad behaviour. After that she asks for an animal beginning with M.
The boy shouts from the other side of the door: Maybe an elephant!
Name an animal that begins with "E"
The class teacher asks students to name an animal that begins with an E . One boy says, Elephant. Then the teacher asks for an animal that begins with a T . The same boy says, Two elephants. The teacher sends the boy out of the class for bad behavior. After that she asks for an animal beginning with M .The boy shouts from the other side of the wall: Maybe an elephant!
David received a parrot for his birthday.
The parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary.
Every other word was an obscenity.
Those that weren’t expletives, were to say the least, rude.
David tried hard to change the bird’s attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything he could think of. Nothing worked.
He yelled at the bird and the bird yelled back.
He shocked the bird and the bird just got more angry and more rude.
Finally, in a moment of desperation, David put the bird in the freezer, just for a few moments.
He heard the bird squawk and kick and scream-then suddenly, there was quiet.
David was frightened that he might have hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door.
The parrot calmly stepped out and said “I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’ll endeavor at once to correct my behavior. I really am truly sorry and beg your forgiveness.”
David was astonished at the bird’s change in attitude and was about to ask what had made such a dramatic change when the parrot continued, “May I ask what did the chicken do?”
Because Soviet jokes are on-trend...
The CIA, the FBI and the KGB are competing for the title of the Best Criminal Catcher. They're given a task by the General Secretariat of UN to catch a rabbit in the forest which he'd released. The CIA plants well-trained animal spies throughout the forest, and after 3 months of investigation they conclude the rabbit doesn't exist. The FBI burns down the forest along with the rabbit, and declare that it cannot be helped. When it's KGB's turn, they go into the forest and after 2 hours they come out with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: "OK! OK! I give up! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!"