android Jokes

Why do thieves prefer to steal Android phones over iPhones?

Because they like to Hangout and not FaceTime.

What do you get when you teach Android grammar?

A droid

Why doesn't Captain Picard have an iPhone

He already has an android, and it came with a data plan.

Why does ACDC prefer Android to Apple?

She's Got The Jack

Apple is always 4 years behind Android phones...

... so I guess 2020 will be explosive!

A recent survey says women prefer 4-5 inches over 6 inches and bigger, citing a "better fit" being one of the top reasons

While preference between Android and iOS devices are evenly split.

Why does Snow White own an Android?

Because she hates Apples.

How do you trigger an Android fanboy?

Sent from my iPhone

Android lets you use "Lumos" for the flashlight, "Silencio" for the notifications...

but not "Incendio". That is a Samsung exclusive.

I asked my very religious mother for the new iPhone...

And she said she'd get me a smartphone, but I had a choice. If I start going to church, I would get the iPhone I wanted. If I didn't go to church, I would get a crappy low end android.

She said it was Yahweh or the Huawei.

The "Lumos/Nox" trick on Android phones is pretty neat. However...

I'd advise the Galaxy Note 7 crowd to avoid "Avada Kedavra."

What do you call someone who always talks about apple products?

An android user.

My phone started to act weird when I researched buying a new phone.

It became a Paranoid Android.

What do you call an Android with perfect grammar?

A droid.

Step 1: Have Android phone - Step 2: Say "Ok Google, what are people from Phoenix called?"

You're welcome

Apple iCloud was hacked releasing nude pictures of celebrities all over the internet

Thank god Adele uses android

Why do androids go to Africa to party?

Because Botswana have fun.

What's the best screen grabber for Windows 10?

An Android phone.

What's an Android developer's favourite cereal?

Boot Loops

Why did Snow White buy an android phone?

She thought the apple was poisoned.

A lot of parents don't know that there is another way to entertain children rather than by giving them an iPad.

By giving them an Android tablet!

Tim Cook officially came out of the closet...

at least this is the one time when Android users can't claim that theirs came out first.

In light of Mark Zuckerburg offloading as much Facebook stock as he can...

If Zuckerburg was a Radiohead song, what song would he be?

Paranoid Android.

Why do Australian nymphomaniacs prefer Android?

They really like rooting.

Do androids dream of electric sheep?

Only the Welsh ones.

Star trek predicting future technology?

How do we know apple won't be around long?
Because Captain Picard uses an android.

What should Tony Stark use to update his android friend, who is worthy enough to pick up Mjolnir?

Vitamin A, because it improves Vision.

Microsoft released Microsoft Edge for iOs and Android

You finally have the #1 browse to download real browsers now for mobile.

{ Awesome Share } Castle Clash Hack Tool 100% Working on Android, Ios - Download Now!

I think Android application developers are magical.

They're like open sorcerers.

[AMA request] The lone employee at Google responsible for coding the Hangouts Android app