Android Jokes

83 android jokes and hilarious android puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about android that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Are you an Android user or know someone who is? Look no further! Read this article to get the best Android phone and emoji jokes. Find out how Android is related to BlackBerry and Macs, as well as what makes an Android developer chuckle. Plus, discover the best Android apps for improving camera quality and adding some fun to your day.

Funniest Android Short Jokes

Short android jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The android humour may include short mobile jokes also.

  1. Why do thieves prefer to steal Android phones over iPhones? Because they like to Hangout and not FaceTime.
  2. Eve gets an apple Eve: I got an Apple.
    Adam: ...

    Eve: ...
    Adam: ...
    Eve: What?
    Adam: I thought we'd decided on Android.
    Eve: The serpent said this was better.
  3. Why doesn't Captain Picard have an iPhone He already has an android, and it came with a data plan.
  4. Last night I was thinking to myself "I wonder how much Google really knows about me?" But then my Android phone texted me the message "not much". So I feel better now.
  5. To all the Android users who just can't seem to gain administrator access to their devices on their own: We're rooting for you!
  6. I wish orange was a common color option for android phones Would make it easier to compare them to Apples.
  7. Why do Stormtroopers only have iPhones? Because they couldn't find the Androids they were looking for!
  8. iPhone users, don't bother sending the Meteor emoji to your Android friends... ...It won't have the same impact.
  9. Last night I dropped my phone on my face... Well I geuss my android has turned into an eye phone.
  10. A recent survey says women prefer 4-5 inches over 6 inches and bigger, citing a "better fit" being one of the top reasons While preference between Android and iOS devices are evenly split.

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Android One Liners

Which android one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with android? I can suggest the ones about apple and apps.

  1. Why do Adam and Eve use Android? Because Eve violated the apple terms and conditions.
  2. What do you call a melancholy Android? A sigh borg.
  3. What do you get when you teach Android grammar? A droid
  4. Why do all doctors use Android phones? Because an Apple keeps them away
  5. Why does ACDC prefer Android to Apple? She's Got The Jack
  6. Apple is always 4 years behind Android phones... ... so I guess 2020 will be explosive!
  7. How do you trigger an Android fanboy? Sent from my iPhone
  8. Why does Snow White own an Android? Because she hates Apples.
  9. Why don't robots like Apples? Because They're androids!
  10. Which setting does Captain America search for in his Android Settings? Language!
  11. Why don't robots like apples? They're androids.
  12. Android group chats be like Laughed at Android group chats be like
  13. What do you call someone who always talks about apple products? An android user.
  14. What do you call an Android with perfect grammar? A droid.
  15. Why do androids go to Africa to party? Because Botswana have fun.

Iphone Android Jokes

Here is a list of funny iphone android jokes and even better iphone android puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do iPhone users and Future Trunks have in common? They both really hate Androids.
  • TIL Sir Patrick Stewart refuses to own an iPhone. He prefers Androids!
  • Man buys an iPhone X. A man was devastated after purchasing an Iphone X with Android features ...
    Well, you could say that was uneXpected. I mean, he expected apple but IOno
  • Apple is copying Android and using food names for iPhone software updates... Unveiled just today, the latest update is called \*\*Ketchup\*\*.
  • Sigourney Weaver uses iPhone Because she hates Android.
  • What do you call a person who sends messages on both an Android and an iPhone? Bitextual
  • android fanboys hating on iPhone and its users for years Blew up in their face.
  • Seven Why was iPhone 7 afraid of Android 7 ?
    Android 7 exploded...
  • How many Android users does it take to buy an iPhone? Zero. Apple doesn't accept EBT.
  • What did the Android call the iPhone 7 after being insulted by him? A j**...

Android Phone Jokes

Here is a list of funny android phone jokes and even better android phone puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Did you know that God uses Android phones? It's because he made the galaxy and the apple is forbidden.
  • My phone started to act weird when I researched buying a new phone. It became a Paranoid Android.
  • The "Lumos/Nox" trick on Android phones is pretty neat. However... I'd advise the Galaxy Note 7 crowd to avoid "Avada Kedavra."
  • Step 1: Have Android phone - Step 2: Say "Ok Google, what are people from Phoenix called?" You're welcome
  • Android phone can be so annoying Just received a notification that my bible needs update, for what exactly?
    Has Adam eaten another apple.
  • What's the best screen grabber for Windows 10? An Android phone.
  • Why did Snow White buy an android phone? She thought the apple was poisoned.
  • TIL How to become an Android Developer Go to Settings > About Phone and tap on "Build Number" 7 times.
  • Why were Android phones banned in Australia? The customers had a bad habit of rooting them.
  • Did I record my friend Sam's opera performance with an Android or Apple phone? I used a SamSung.
Android joke, Did I record my friend Sam's opera performance with an Android or Apple phone?

Android User Jokes

Here is a list of funny android user jokes and even better android user puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Tim Cook officially came out of the closet... at least this is the one time when Android users can't claim that theirs came out first.
  • Android users won't get this. Update.
Android joke, Android users won't get this.

Amusing & Witty Android Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun

What funny jokes about android you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean desktop jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make android pranks.

Apple iCloud was hacked releasing n**... pictures of celebrities all over the internet

Thank god Adele uses android

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Star trek predicting future technology?

How do we know apple won't be around long?
Because Captain Picard uses an android.

What's an Android developer's favourite cereal?

Boot Loops

Android lets you use "Lumos" for the flashlight, "Silencio" for the notifications...

but not "Incendio". That is a Samsung exclusive.

I asked my very religious mother for the new iPhone...

And she said she'd get me a smartphone, but I had a choice. If I start going to church, I would get the iPhone I wanted. If I didn't go to church, I would get a c**... low end android.
She said it was Yahweh or the Huawei.

A lot of parents don't know that there is another way to entertain children rather than by giving them an iPad.

By giving them an Android tablet!

In light of Mark Zuckerburg offloading as much Facebook stock as he can...

If Zuckerburg was a Radiohead song, what song would he be?
Paranoid Android.

Things that didn't exist the last time England were in the semis


What do you call an android in a boat?

Row bot.

An android inexplicably shut down in the middle of a bar fight.

She was later arrested and charged with battery.

What famous humanoid robot wrote Phantom of the Opera?

Android Lloyd Webber

The day when my laptop was bored :(

The other day, my laptop asked me "Can we do something **hot,** just turn me on?!"
I replied, "Absolutely!!"
I opened **Android Studio** along with **30 chrome tabs**.

It was the **hottest thing** we ever did.

Some say that iOS is better, while some say that Android is better. But at the end of the day...

it is night.

I want it my way

I told my wife she can only get an iPhone, but if she isn't going to get one then I'm just getting her a cheap Android phone. She tried to argue with me, but I wouldn't have it.
I said, "Baby... it's my way or the Huawei."

[Unashamed Dad Joke] What do you call an android that was designed specifically to move a small wooden boat around?

A row-bot.

Android joke, Why do Adam and Eve use Android?

jokes about android