Andrew Jokes

58 andrew jokes and hilarious andrew puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about andrew that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Check out this collection of the best jokes from Andrew Schulz! Laugh along with his sharp wit and clever one-liners about the Andrew name, his work Inside with Catherine and Geoff, and more. Get ready to crack up and have some fun!

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Funniest Andrew Short Jokes

Short andrew jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The andrew humour may include short andrew name jokes also.

  1. In Britain, when you turn 100, you get a letter from the Queen. And when you turn 16, you get a text from Prince Andrew.
  2. Andrew Tate arrested in Romania after a pizza box showed he was in the country. Police arrested him within 30 minutes As any longer would mean they had to give him a free garlic bread.
  3. Andrew Tate says his romanian jail is infested with lice. "Can you imagine sharing a cell with vile parasites?" Say the lice.
  4. The Queen always said her corgis were like children to her. So it makes sense that they've been given to Prince Andrew.
  5. Prince Andrew is going to inherit The Queen's Corgis. Makes sense with his experience in grooming.
  6. A street near Buckingham palace is being renamed to Prince Andrew's Close It's not honorary, it's a warning.
  7. Why does Tom Holland never drive? Because Andrew and Tobey are more experienced parallel Parkers
  8. Following the death of Queen Elizabeth, prince andrew has been given the role of looking after the corgis. At least they will be well groomed.
  9. in the UK when you turn 100 you get a letter from the queen and when you're 13 you get a text from prince Andrew
  10. Jeffrey Epstein, Prince Andrew, and the Dalai Lama walk into a bar.... Bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve underage here."

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Andrew One Liners

Which andrew one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with andrew? I can suggest the ones about prince andrew and sue.

  1. What do you call Andrew Tate in a Romanian prison? In-cell
  2. Prince Andrew didn't kill himself! Sorry, just practicing it
  3. Is Prince Andrew worried about his current situation? No, he isn't sweating it at all.
  4. I'm not sure why all the fuss about Prince Andrew It seems to be a pretty minor affair...
  5. And now…for the ultimate test of Andrew Tate's masculinity… Prison
  6. Why did Prince Andrew stop grooming the Corgi's? He found out they were 18 in dog years
  7. The Queen has given Andrew a new title... The Nobody Formerly Known as Prince.
  8. What do Margaret Thatcher & Prince Andrew have in common? ...They both shafted miners!
  9. How does FBI deputy director Andrew McCabe get home when he's lost? Fusion GPS
  10. What is Julie Andrews' favourite coffee? Do re me fa so latte.
  11. Official statement from Prince Andrew:
    I did not have sweaty relations with that girl
  12. John Quincy Adams is playing a card game ......Andrew a Jack.
  13. Prince Andrew, did you manage to handle that interview well? "Yeah, no sweat"
  14. So sorry to hear about Prince Andrew’s sudden heart attack next month.
  15. Andrew: I am done with you... period! Bryan: Oh yeah? Well I'm done with you... BLOOD!

Prince Andrew Jokes

Here is a list of funny prince andrew jokes and even better prince andrew puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • When you turn 100 you get a letter from the Queen when you turn 13 you get a text from Prince Andrew.
  • I used to think I was bad at dating in high school as I never had a girlfriend. Prince Andrew must have been way worse, he was 45 when he got a high school girlfriend!
  • Prince Andrew was asked if he is worried about being held accountable for what he did... "No sweat"
  • I have no doubt Prince Andrew will walk away from all of the accusations alleged toward him without any consequences No sweat
  • Queens corgi's Why did the queen leave her corgis to prince Andrew
    He has the most experience as a groomer
  • The Royal Family are going to send Prince Andrew to see what public opinion is like Just putting the feeler out
  • Prince Andrew "terribly sorry" to Jeffrey Epstein that he can't have contact with him anymore.
  • I’ve only just noticed this hand. “Is it someone saying, ‘You’ll regret this photograph?”
    That’s Prince Andrew’s hand!
  • Did you hear Prince Andrew is stepping back from his Royal Duties? I guess he just wants to spend more time with the children.
  • What do Bill Clinton, Prince Andrew and D. Trump have in common? Besides having low hanging fruits, they know Epstein was murdered.

Andrew Name Jokes

Here is a list of funny andrew name jokes and even better andrew name puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I asked my wife if she was cheating on me. She replied, "No, Eric. You think I would stoop that low?" My name is Andrew...
  • King Charles has announced that he will be sending his best two Helicopter pilots to Ukraine for the war. Their names are Andrew and Harry
  • I met a man on the London bridge joke As the sun set on the ridge, he tipped his hat and drew his name and cheated at the guessing game.
    What was the man’s name?
    The man’s name is Andrew.
  • j**...'s is naming a pizza after Andrew Tate The small sausage
  • What were the British v**... Islands named for? Having the rare privilege to not have Prince Andrew visit. Yet...
  • Prince Andrew has been named in a US s**... lawsuit I wonder how many kids received a royal bollocking.
Andrew joke, Prince Andrew has been named in a US s**... lawsuit

Andrew Dice Jokes

Here is a list of funny andrew dice jokes and even better andrew dice puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • An Andrew Dice Clay-esqe bit There was an Old Lady who swallowed a fly. She made $50.
Andrew joke, An Andrew Dice Clay-esqe bit

Uproarious Andrew Jokes to Share with Friends

What funny jokes about andrew you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean carol jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make andrew pranks.

BREAKING NEWS: Ghislaine Maxwell, former on again / off again partner of Epstein, has been arrested by the FBI.

In other news, Prince Andrew has just suffered a heart attack, Bill Clinton has suddenly developed Alzheimer's, and all prison guards at Maxwell's detention centre have suddenly had to take long naps...

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irish man are chatting in a bar. The Englishman says "We named my son George because he was born on St. George's Day".

The Scotsman says "Wow, what a coincidence! My son is called Andrew because he was born on St. Andrew's Day"
The Irishman says "I can't believe it! Wait till I tell you about our Pancake"

A lady goes to the store to buy a hook mount on a wall to hang her coat. She walks up to the counter with it but doesn't have a screw to mount it to the wall. The checkout guy says "do you want a screw for the hook? She answers ""No but I'll blow you for that toaster."
(A version of an old Andrew Dice Clay joke)

Electronic Arts CEO Andrew Wilson has a one night stand.

The woman he was with contacts him soon after to let him know she was pregnant, and wants him to own up to his mistake.
Andrew then replies, "It's not a mistake, it's surprise mechanics."

"Welcome to the 41st Annual meeting of the Ohio Parasites Club"

"I'm Andrew Smith, and I'll be your host for the day"

A benefit of Charles III ascension to the throne

Once they change the picture on the money to the new King, Andrew won't have to tuck a picture of his mother into the G-strings of strippers.

Andrew joke, Why did Prince Andrew stop grooming the Corgi's?