The Best 14 Anaconda Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Anaconda jokes. There are some anaconda loin jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these anaconda homerun puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Anaconda Jokes and Puns

You: Would you like a keto burger?

My anaconda: No.

On a whim, I bought a snake yesterday at the local pet store...

Last night, I attempted to feed it a freshly grilled hamburger.
Just the patty, no bread.
The thing is, he wouldn't eat it.
As it turns out,
my anaconda don't want none unless you've got buns, Hun.

snake joke

A guy wearing a snake walks up to a hot dog stand and asks for a hot dog for his snake.The woman running the stand says they don't have any buns so it just would be the meat.He says that sorry My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun.

My girlfriend said she's getting a massive tattoo on her back of an anaconda surrounded by flames.

"Do you think it will hurt?" I asked.

"Probably," she replied, "it will take many hours."

I said, "I meant being single."

How do you feed a 90 foot long pet anaconda?

Once. After that somebody else feeds it once.


"Hey, can I try feeding your snake?"

"Sure. His bread is in the pantry."

"Your snake eats... Bread?"

"My anaconda don't want none, unless you got buns, hun."

My wife can't figure out why my pet anaconda won't eat Bratwurst a la cart

I told her that my anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hun.

Anaconda joke, My wife can't figure out why my pet anaconda won't eat Bratwurst a la cart

I love animals, but I'm thinking of getting rid of my pet anaconda. It keeps taking horse sized dumps.

Also, all my horses have gone missing.

I once wrestled an anaconda for 3 days...

Then realized I was masturbating.

My pet snake will only eat rabbits.

You might say my anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hon.

My girlfriend broke up with me because I wasn't a good adder

I'd rather be an anaconda anyway

You can explore anaconda boa reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean anaconda eaten dad jokes. There are also anaconda puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Snakes dont like bread

Except for sirmixalot's anaconda because ***it don't want none unless you got buns Hun***

So the guy who was supposed to get eaten by an anaconda ...

... didn't actually get eaten by an anaconda. When he first made contact with the anaconda, it was afraid and tried to escape.

I guess you would call that a reptile dysfunction.

My Anaconda Don't Want None

Unless You Read The Koran.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the anaconda comatoes jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working anaconda armpit piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes