Amusement Jokes

45 amusement jokes and hilarious amusement puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about amusement that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Are you planning to visit an amusement park soon? Find out about proper etiquette to use when visiting amusement parks, from treating staff with respect to being mindful of the safety of yourself and others. Don't miss out on these tips that every grad needs to know!

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Funniest Amusement Short Jokes

Short amusement jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The amusement humour may include short entertainment jokes also.

  1. Ha - mildly amusing Haha - laughing
    Hahaha - saracstic laughing
    Hahahaha - Staying Alive
  2. I just learned that 'amused' and 'bemused' don't mean the same thing. At first I laughed, but now I don't know what to think!
  3. What's the difference between tinder and amusement parks? Amusement parks have realistic height requirements.
  4. When my wife was in labor I would tell her jokes to keep her mind off the pain. She wasn't amused though. I think it was the delivery.
  5. Laughing scale Ha – Mildly amusing
    Haha – Funny
    Hahaha – Sarcastic laugh
    Hahahaha – Stayin alive
  6. I got ripped off at the amusement park. A guy sold me tickets to the ferrous wheel.
    Turns out it's made of aluminium.
  7. Hear about the vampire who quit his job at the Amusement Park? He used to set up the Hall of Mirrors but he just couldn't see himself doing it anymore.
  8. -Dad, did you ever fall in love with a teacher? -Yes son, the kindergarden teacher
    -And what happened?
    -Your mother was not amused, we had to take you to another school.
  9. I heard a life tip that went; If you're ever too embarrassed to buy something, get a birthday card with it. The cashier wasn't amused by the birthday tampons for my wife.
  10. I was at an amusement park with my friends. They all said the invisible roller coaster was great, but I didn't see the attraction.

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Amusement One Liners

Which amusement one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with amusement? I can suggest the ones about amusing and amused.

  1. It's amusing how Americans love Cardi-B ..but hate Cardi-o
  2. Do you want to hear a joke about a ghost? That's the spirit.
  3. Did you know Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.
  4. What does a ISIS amusement park have as a safety mechanism? Allahu lap-bar.
  5. [OC] What's the most ironic amusement park ride? The ferrous wheel.
  6. The feeling of amusement you get reading about "Florida Man" schadenflorida
  7. I believe god created the earth solely to amuse himself. I am a Recreationist.
  8. I am a theist God was not amused
  9. What do chefs call plants that make them laugh? Amuse Bush.
  10. What do you call a bunch of dolls in line at an amusement park? A Barbie-queue
  11. (Generic title that catches your attention) (Mildly amusing pun)
  12. What did Adele say when she was at the amusement park? Hello from the other ride
  13. I'd made a chemistry joke... ...but all the moderately amusing ones have used to death.
  14. Why is the clown always amused? He is surprised that he's seen as a muse
  15. A dyslexic man walks into a bar Unfortunately, the woman was not amused

Amusement Park Jokes

Here is a list of funny amusement park jokes and even better amusement park puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A pegleg man is at the amusement park... He is a foot short for every ride.
    He leaves and goes to his favorite restaurant:
  • The amusement park was taking photos of me on their rides without my consent When i found out, i was fluming!
  • At the amusement park's Haunted House, the toilets are three inches taller than normal. They like to keep visitors on their toes.
  • What did the broke zombie amusement park say to the wealthy vampire golf course? I just need to get fundead.
  • What did the Russian tell his nervous Socialist Dictator at the amusement park? "Quit Stalin and get on the ride!"
  • What's a jews least favorite amusement park ride? The Holocoaster
  • What do ghosts ride at an amusement park? A roller-ghoster
  • A russian joke: Some people in Mosow got stuck on a ride at an amusement park! That entire country is got stuck on a ride! On something between a haunted mansion and a house of funny mirrors!
  • Did you hear the amusement park was offering free bungee jumping? No strings attached!
  • Five days of the week, my body is a temple. The other two, it's an amusement park!
Amusement joke

Happy Amusement Jokes for a Lighthearted Night with Friends

What funny jokes about amusement you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean recreation jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make amusement pranks.

While my wife was in labor I read her jokes to distract her from the pain, but she didn't seem amused...

**It must have been the delivery.**

Ukrainian authorities are planning to turn the Chernobyl exclusion zone into an amusement park

They say the only difference between it and Disneyland will be that the six foot tall mouse isn't a costume.

A lady walks into a pet store...

She sees a beautiful parrot with a sign on its cage: $10 OBO
The lady asks the pet shop owner, "Why so cheap?" The owner says "This bird used to live in a brothel, so he says a lot of inappropriate things." The lady can't pass up the deal and decides to get the bird anyway.
She gets the bird home and the first thing the bird says is "Finally cleaned up this dump, and the new madam isn't bad looking." The lady finds it amusing.
Her two teen daughters get home and the bird says "New w**... in the house, business will be booming tonight." The girls are shocked but laugh it off.
A few hours later the woman's husband gets home and the bird says "Hey Jim."

Small o**...

A fellow picked up a girl in a bar and took her home with him. After some preliminary drinks and talk, they got undressed, climbed into bed and generally got organized for a leg over.
After a few minutes, the girl started laughing. The fellow asked her what she found so amusing.
"Your o**...," she replied. "It's a bit on the small side."
Hurt, he replied, "It's not used to playing in cathedrals."

A husband, so proud...

....of the fact that his wife had given birth to 6 children, begins to call her "mother of 6" rather than by her first name. The wife was amused at first.
A few years down the road, the wife has grown tired of her husband's description. "Mother of 6, get me a beer!" This type of situation rose to a boiling point.
Finally, while at a party with her husband, he jokingly said, "Hey mother of 6, it's time to go!"
The wife shouted, "I'll be right with you - father of 4!"
[found this scrolling through YouTube Comments]

An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are trying to set up a fenced-in area for some sheep...

but they have a limited amount of building material. The engineer gets up first and makes a square fence with the material, reasoning that it's a pretty good working solution. "No no," says the physicist, "there's a better way." He takes the fence and makes a circular pen, showing how it encompasses the maximum possible space with the given material.
Then the mathematician speaks up: "No, no, there's an even better way." To the others' amusement he proceeds to construct a little tiny fence around himself, then declares:
"I define myself to be on the outside."

Three men shipwreck on an island known for cannibals.

As they wander the jungle they are captured by these cannibals and put in a cage. The biggest and ugliest cannibal approaches the cage and says
"Now we're fun loving cannibals and we like to play games. We'll give you a chance to escape for our amusement, with one item of your choice. If you get to the beach, then you'll be taken back to society. If you fail we shall kill you, skin you, eat you, and turn you into a canoe. Good luck."
The first man wants to go the traditional route and chooses a gun. As he runs to the beach, he runs out of ammo and the cannibals catch him, skin him, eat him, and turn him into a canoe.
The second man asks for a horse. They begrudgingly give him their only horse, and he rides towards the beach, but the cannibals spear him off the horse and skin him, eat him, and turn him into a canoe.
The third man asks for a fork. The cannibals give him a funny look and fetch him a fork. The man begins to stab himself all over. The cannibals ask him why he's making their job easier and he yells
"Try and make a canoe out of me now!"

Taking the kids out

A husband and wife were discussing what to do with their two kids on the weekend. "They want to go to the zoo and the amusement park" said the wife.
"That's too expensive" said the husband. "It'll have to be one or the other."
"Well, which do you think?"
"Probably Mikey."

One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife.

Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your b**...!"
His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go un-rewarded.
The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. "What the Heck is this??" he said to himself as a little 'dust' cloud appeared when he shook them out.
"April," he hollered into the bathroom, "why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?"
She replied... "It's not talcum powder... it's Miracle Grow."

One of my husband's duties as a novice drill instructor at Fort Jackson, S.C., was to e**... new recruits to the mess hall.

After everyone had made it through the chow line, he sat them down and told them
"There are three rules in this mess hall: Shut up!
Eat up!
Get up!"
Checking to see that he had everyone's attention, he asked, "What is the first rule?"
Much to the amusement of the other instructors, 60 privates yelled in unison, "Shut up, Drill Sergeant!"

My uncle got a severe allergic reaction while staying in a remotely located hotel near Barcelona...

he would have died certainly as there were no hospitals close by. Suddenly we heard someone knocking on the hotel's door. Miraculously it was the hotel's in-house doctor.

We were quite amused by how the doctor showed up at the exact time he was needed.

Nobody expected the Spanish Inn Physician

How to add extra fun during your amusement park ride ?

Carry some extra nuts and bolts with you.
as soon as the ride begins, Tap on the shoulder of the guy in front of you. Show them the nuts and bolts and ask
"Are these from your seat ? "

Amusement joke, Laughing scale