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Amidst Jokes

8 amidst jokes and hilarious amidst puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about amidst that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.


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Great Amidst Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends

What is a good amidst joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

A programmer and his colleagues attempt to enter a restaurant

Amidst their chatting, one of them approaches the receptionist:
"Table for 8, please"
"Are you sure, Mister?" she replied. "I can see there are actually 9 of you here"
"What? No, you're mistaken. We're 8 people, look"
He turns around, and begins doing a head count:
"0, 1, 2, 3..."

Breaking news: Amidst all the chaos, Eminem just got kicked out of a very high end bar.

Apparantly he asked the bartender for 4 shots but the bartender refused service and said you only get one shot.

Amidst all of the distractions on this 4th of July, let's not forget what we're celebrating

That the British blew a 13 colony lead

A man stumbles and falls into a well....

....and grasps a spindly root that stops his fall but not before he has traversed a hundred feet. His grip loosening, he cries out in desperation, "Is there anybody up there?!"
He looks up only to see a circle of the sky. Suddenly, the clouds part and amidst them comes forth a beam of bright light and a booming voice thunders, "I, the Lord am here. Let go of the root and I shall save you."
The man hesitates before he yells, "Anyone else up there?!"

A football coach addresses his team amidst rumors of his racism...

and says:
"I know people have been saying things, but those rumors couldn't be farther from the truth. The truth is, I don't care what color any of you are. I don't care if you're black. I don't care if you're white. It simply doesn't matter. So, I'll tell you what. From now on, you're all green.
"Now, everybody get on the bus. Light green in front, dark green in back."

Amidst all of the current negativity, it's important to remember...

There's only 35 claps left until Christmas.

What did the secret cannibal society do when they caught the spy amidst them?

They 'dismembered' him.

A panda walks into a cafe...

A panda walks into a cafe. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and proceeds to fire it at the other patrons.
"Why?" asks the confused, surviving waiter amidst the carnage, as the panda makes towards the exit.
The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder. "Well, I'm a panda," he says. "Look it up."
The waiter turns to the relevant entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation. "Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. **Eats, shoots and leaves.**"


\* Stolen from Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation


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