The Best 35 American Indian Jokes

Following is our collection of funny American Indian jokes. There are some american indian east india jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these american indian indians puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest American Indian Jokes and Puns

A cowboy sees a bunch of American Indians on the horizon and thinks: ''I'm fucked...'', but a voice in the back of his head says: ''Not so fast! Kill the chief!!!''

''What?! Why?'' - thinks the cowboy.

''Just kill the chief!'' - says the voice.

The cowboy hesitated a bit more and than drew his gun and shot the chief.

As the chief was falling from his horse the voice in the cowboy's head said: ''*Now* you're fucked...''

One of the British national daily newspapers was asking readers: "What it means to be British?".

Some of the emails were hilarious but this one from a Swiss was a winner.
ย 
"Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for
a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a
Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on a Swedish furniture and watch
American shows on a Japanese TV. He buys a holiday home in Spain, Skis in France, fancies Swedish birds and has a Romanian au-pair.
ย 
And the most British thing of all?
"Suspicious of anything Foreign "

A dear friend of mine passed away this week. This was one of his jokes: What do you call half of a thousand native American insomniacs?

The Indian nap-less 500.

Two Native Americans

Unwittingly walk into a gay bar and sit
down to order a pitcher of beer. As they're sitting there
sucking back on their ale, a gay guy walks up and says,
"How would you boys like a blow job?"
The one Indian stands up and decks the guy, knocking him
unconscious. He then sits back down and finishes his beer.
His buddy looks over and says, "Hey Joe, what did you do
that for?"
Joe replies, "Not sure but it was something about getting
a job!"

jokes about american indian

Land O Lakes

Have you guys seen the new Land O Lakes butter packaging? They removed the Native American girl from their labels to be more politically correct.

Now that's the most American thing I've ever seen; remove the Indian and keep the land.


A Fishing Tale


On the shore of the Indian Ocean a raggedy Indian fisherman lay dozing with a hat over his face. Beside him two fishing lines were stuck into the sand.

Up comes an American.

'What are you sleeping for?' says the American. 'You'd be better off catching fish.'

'What for?' asks the fisherman.

'What do you mean, what for? You'd catch some fish, you'd sell them and with the money you'd buy yourself a trawler.

The trawler would catch even more fish. You'd sell it and buy yourself an even bigger boat. You'd catch still more fish. You'd sell it.

Then you'd build yourself a fish processing factory . . . and get rich.

And then you could lie on the beach and sleep.'

The fisherman pulled his hat even further down over his face.

'But that's what I'm doing now.'

"Five Horses Is Her Name"

A man asked an American Indian what was his wife's name. He replied, "She is called Five Horses".
The man said, "That's an unusual name for a wife. What does it mean?"
The Old Indian answered, "It old Indian name. It mean ..."
"NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG!"

I heard we like Native American jokes.

Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with
his ear to the ground.
One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see
that Indian?"
"Yeah," says the other cowboy.
"Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground.
He can hear things for miles in any direction."
Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says,
"about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white.
Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon."
"Incredible!" says the cowboy to his friend. "This Indian
knows how far away they are, how many horses, what color they
are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Amazing!"
The Indian looks up and says, "Ran over me about a
half hour ago."

Indian On The Road

I'm driving from Santa Fe to Albuquerque when I see an American Indian lying on the road with his ear to the ground. Curious, I pull over, walk up to him and ask, "Excuse me, what are you doing?" He says, "Silver 1991 Chevy station wagon, one man, one woman, two children". I say, "Wow, you can tell all that just by listening to the road?" He says, "Heck no, they just ran me over".

Sex Statistics on a Plane.

A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be
seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They
exchange brief hellos and he notices she is reading a manual about sexual statistics. He asks her about it and she replies,
"This is a very interesting book about sexual statistics.
It identifies that American Indians have the longest
average penises and Polish men have the biggest average
diameter. By the way, my name is Jill. What's yours?"
He coolly replies, "Tonto Kawalski, nice to meet you."

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman... (long joke)

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a Hawaiian and an Alaskan), an Argentinean, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovak, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, an Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uruguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, an Iranian, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Syrian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, an Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahaman, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Canadian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Ghanaian, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian, 2 Africans and you...
walk into a fine restaurant.

"I'm sorry," says the maรฎtre d', after scrutinizing the group, "but you can't come in here without a Thai."

You can explore american indian america reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean american indian bangladeshi dad jokes. There are also american indian puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


So a teacher asks his class the question...

"What's your opinion on donating food to foreign countries?" The African student says, "What's food?" The Indian student says, "What's donating?" The American student says, " What's foreign countries?" And the Chinese student says, "What's my opinion?"

An American white guy visits India.

Wanting to get a more authentic experience, he goes to an Indian restaurant and tells them to serve him their specials, no questions asked. After eating a few bites, he calls the waiter and says, "Hey, this is brilliant food, but I just have a tiny request. This is a tad bit too spicy for my taste, so could you please ask the chef to make my food less spicy than this please?"

The waiter perplexed, looks at the man and says "Sir,
....this is dessert"

Once an American, a French and an Indian were travelling in an airplane.

To find out where they have reached, the American stretched his hand out of the plane and said, "We have reached America".

The other two asked how for which he replied,"Well my hand hit the Statue of Liberty".

Next the French stretches his hand out and said,"We have reached France".

The other two asks how for which he replied,"Well my hand hit the Eiffel Tower".

Then the Indian puts his hand out of the plane and said, "We have reached India".

The other two asks how and he replied, "Well someone stole my watch".

Old Native American joke

A young Indian boy was curious about how he got his name. He asked the chief, "Chief, how do we get our names?"

The Chief answers him, "We give names by what is outside of the teepee during ones birth.

"When your mom was born, it was a beautiful April day, so we named her BlueSky.

"After your dad's birth we were greeted by a majestic deer, so we named him WhiteTail."

The chief looked at the boy a little puzzled,

"Why do you ask BearFuckingBear?"

(Dirty) The cavalry were riding through the plains with their Native American guide.

The Indian gets off his horse and puts his ear to the ground. He looks up at the captain and says " Buffalo come " . The captain is astounded and asks " Can you really hear buffalo from here? The Indian replies "NO, side of face all sticky!"

What do you call gay sex between the founder of Scientology and a Native American?

The Indian in the Hubbard.

They walk in the bar

A bartender is working at an upscale bar downtown when all of the sudden, an Englishman, a Dane, a Frenchman, a German, a Russian, an American, a Canadian, a Mexican, a Peruvian, a Brazilian, a Colombian, a Chinese, a Japanese, a Korean, 29 different Africans from all different African countries, and an Indian all walk in to the bar.

And the bartender says to them, sorry gentlemen, but you can't come here without a Thai.

^thanks ^SnW

If Bill Gates eats American food and Ghandi eats Indian food, what food does Usain Bolt eat?

fast food


An American and an Indian board a plane to LAX,

Indian sits next to American.
American asks: What kind of "ian" are you?
- What?
- I said What kind of "ian" are you?
- I don't understand your question.
- Stupid! Are you Cambodian, Indian or Iranian?
- Oh! I am Indian.
2 hours passed without a word.
Indian asks: What kind of "key" are you?
- What?
- Are you a monkey, donkey, or Yankee?

A Jew, Chinaman, American and a Indian are sitting around a table

... and they're all sipping on their bourbon. They're all very rich and they chinaman says " I think I will buy Apple. " And they all nod in approval save the jew.
Then the Indian says " I want to buy Google. " And they all nod in approval save the jew.
Then the American says " I want to buy Samsung " And they all nod in approval save the jew.

Then the jew shudders and says " sorry, not selling. "

In the past

Russian scientists dug 1000 mtr deep and found a copper wire.
They concluded:
1000 yrs back our ancestors were using copper cable technology ..

American scientists dug 2000 mtr deep and found optic fibre.
They concluded:
2000 yrs back our ancestors were using optic fibre technolgy ..

Indian scientist dug and found nothing. They concluded our ancestors were using Wireless Technology.!

What do you call 500 Native Americans with no apples?

The Indian Apple-less 500.

An American guy is talking with European in some bar in USA.

The American guy is saying: "I heard you have now some problems with immigrants in Europe."

An Indian bends from the next table and says: "Be aware of that, we heavily underestimated that once"

Leaders show the way....

Indians are *MODIfied*

Brits are *disMAYed*

Americans are *TRUMPed*

And the French are *Macarooned*

And Canadian are *Justified*

While Russians just stay _*Put in*_..!!

An Englishman, Scottishman, Irishman, Welshman, Frenchman, Russian, Spaniard, Mexican, American, Norweigan, Swede, Albanian, Italian, Indian, Moroccan, Dutchman, Brazilian, Kenyan, Australian and Belgian walk into a bar.

The barman says; "You can't come in here without a Thai."

An American, a Chinese and an Indian went on a world tour by Air.

The American proudly declared "we have reached my homeland USA" pointing at the Statue of Liberty.

After some hours, the Chinese pointed at the Great Wall of China and exclaimed "friends, we have reached China".

More hours went by and all eyes were on the Indian. He calmly opened the window and put his hand outside. When he pulled his arm back, his wristwatch was gone. Unconcerned, he announced "Guys, welcome to India."

What do you call a Native American with psoriasis?

Apache Indian

An American Indian and his Son are Hunting

"Buffalo come" the father says. "How you do know?" asks the son.
The father points towards his lobe and says "Stick to ear".


What is globalization?

Question : What is globalization?
Answer : Princess Diana's death

Question : How come?

Answer :

An English princess with an
Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a
French tunnel, driving a
German car with a
Dutch engine, driven by a
Belgian who was high on
Scottish whiskey, followed closely by
Italian Paparazzi, on
Japanese motorcycles, treated by an
American doctor, using
Brazilian medicines!
And this is sent to you by a
Canadian, using
Bill Gates' technology which he got from the
Japanese.

And you are probably reading this on
one of the IBM clones that use
Philippine-made chips, and
Korean made monitors, assembled by Bangladeshi
workers in a Singapore plant, transported by lorries
driven by Indians, hijacked by Indonesians and finally
sold to you by a Chinese!

How much is your height

Indian:- My height is 167cms

European :- My height is 182.5 cms

American :- My height is 1/3675 of a Football field

What do you call several hundred Native Americans without nipples?

The Indian Nippleless 500

A native American indian is talking to his psychiatrist

He tells him "Doc, I dont know what is wrong with me. One moment I think I'm a teepee, the next I think I'm a wigwam."

The doctor says "Ah, I think I see your problem. You're too tense."

An American mistakes a Hindu from India as a Muslim from Pakistan

Indian guy goes "Excuse me sir, you seem to have mistaken me for a Muslim from Pakistan. I belong to 711 not 911."

I will show myself out.


On which side do you drive?

On which side do you drive?
American: Right-side.
Britisher: Left-side
Indian: Depends on which side the oncoming traffic is.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the american indian united states jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working american indian bengali piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes