Amen Jokes
47 amen jokes and hilarious amen puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about amen that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Amen Short Jokes
Short amen jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The amen humour may include short anon jokes also.
- If we're saying Amen and Awomen now... Are we going to start having to sing hymns and herns?
- What do you call a friendly immobile sea creature that offers you food and lodging? An amenable anemone with amenities.
- What's the difference between a good nun and a bad nun? A good nun says amen and a bad nun says ah, men
- A soldier on sentry duty fell asleep while standing up, And woke to find his commanding officer standing in front of him, looking furious. With great presence of mind, the soldier said, "amen"
- Did you hear about the house with special drinks for prayer? I heard it had good amen-i-teas
- I prayed to god, and it finally worked! "Dear god, please ignore this prayer, in your name, amen."
- I once knew a dyslexic priest He always said "woof" instead of "amen".
- Can I get an amen? Saw this today
- What's a priest's favorite X-men? A-Men.
- Amen. As my dad and I were in church, I sneezed.
"Bless you" he said.
"Thank you, Father"
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Amen One Liners
Which amen one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with amen? I can suggest the ones about noun and hone.
- What is God's least favorite spice? Sin, Amen!
- How many clergymen does it take to screw a lightbulb? Amen.
- Instead of studying i tried to pray. I really hope God will give me an Amen.
- How does a priest apologize after behaving poorly? He makes Amens.
- Why did the feminist get kicked out of church? She refused to say amen
- How do gay guys end their prayers? With Amen.
- The police took down the restroom in my local park. It was public amenity number one.
- What do broke pastors eat in college? Amen noodles
- A gay priest walks into a bar full of men, Amen.
- Twenty One Preachers Fueled by Amen.
- What group of people pray the most? A-Men
B-Keepers
C-ing is believing - Congress quire What does the congressional choir sing at the end of a hymn?
Amen-d. - What's Lil Jon's favorite hotel amenity? Turndown (service) for what?
- Why are all waiters and waitresses religious? They always offer amen you.
- What do you call a team of Christian mutant superheroes? The A-Men
Gather Around for Heartwarming Amen Jokes and Uplifting Humor
What funny jokes about amen you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean chairman jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make amen pranks.
A lot of people are roasting Cleaver on saying "Awoman"...
I mean, I know that "Amen" comes from Hebrew and means "so be it", and therefore "Awoman" would make no sense in Hebrew.
In Shebrew, however, it makes complete sense!!!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I got my kid baptized yesterday
Priest: Do you believe in the Holy Spirit and the holy Catholic church?
Me: I do.
Priest: Do you believe in the communion of saints and the forgiveness of sins?
Me: I do.
Priest: Do you believe in the resurrection of the body and life everlasting?
Me: I do
Priest: Do you hereby indemnify and hold harmless the Catholic church for any s**... misconduct to you and your family for ever and ever amen?
Me: I do--- wait! Hold on!
Priest: Too late! You said it!
Family Prayer
Little Johnny's family is sitting at the dinner table. Lil Johnny's dad tells him to say the dinner prayer.
Little Johnny says, "Dear God, Thank you for the food we are about to eat, and please, oh please God, send clothes for all those poor ladies on Dad's computer. Amen!"
Once there was a guy named Bill who wanted a horse.
On Craigslist, Bill saw a Christian horse so he went to check it out.
When Bill got to the ranch, the horse's owner said "It's easy to ride him. Just say 'praise the Lord' to make him go, and 'amen' to make him stop." Bill got on the horse and said "praise the Lord." the horse started to walk. "Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, praise the Lord" and the horse is running. Now Bill sees the cliff and says: "AMEN."
The horse stops and Bill says: "Whew! Praise the lord!"
A preacher trained his horse to go when he said "Thank God" and to stop when he said "Amen"
The preacher mounted the horse and said "Thank God" and went for a ride. When he wanted to stop for lunch , he said " "Amen." He took off again saying "Thank God"
The horse started going toward the edge of a cliff. The preacher got exited and said "whoa! whoa!" Then he remembered and said "Amen" and the horse stopped at the edge of the cliff. The preacher was so relieved and grateful that he looked up to heaven and said "Thank God!"
Second Amendment
The Second Amendment of the Constitution affords me the right to wear short sleeve shirts to work.
The right to bare arms.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do we say Amen at the end of a prayer and not Awomen?
Because we sings Hymns and not Hers.
How would the second amendment look if it was written in Canada?
"The right of the people to keep and arm bears shall not be infringed"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do feminist hate the bible?
Because it ends with A-men
What's the first amendment in Super Mario's constitution?
Freedom of Peach
As a second amendment guy I just don't think Jesus would have a problem with guns.
Except nail guns of course
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Sarah, i understand that you are a feminist...
...but you can't end your prayer with "awomen" instead of "amen"
credits to an anonymous facebook post of which i was too lazy to read the name
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
a simple one
**what do you call a team of**
**religious mutants?**
**A-men**
The second amendment
-Officer this is infringing on the second amendment! The right to lead an organized militia!
-sir this is an A10 warthog and an M1A1 Abrams
-there medicinal
Why do we need the second amendment?
I mean, we have rocks so, "same thing" right!?
What did the First Amendment say to the Second Amendment?
Please upgrade your ISP plan to view content.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
That o**... in church
Pastor: *ahem*
Guy: AMEN!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Amen
During Sermon at a Sunday service , the Pastor said: "If I had all the Beer in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river".
And the congregation cried, "Amen! "
"And if I had all the Wine in the world, I'd take it and throw it in the river".
And the congregation cried: "Amen!"
"And if I had all the Whiskey and r**... in the world, I'd take it all and throw it in the river".
Again the congregation cried: "Amen!"...
The Pastor sat down.
The Junior Pastor then stood up and said: "For our closing Hymn, let's turn to page 126 of our Hymn books and sing, "We shall drink from the river".
The whole Congregation SCREAMED *HALLELUJAH!*
A priest was giving a sermon about temperance.
With great enthusiasm, he said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and throw it in the river!"
The congregation nodded their approval and shouted "Amen!"
He continued, "If I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd throw it in the river!"
"Amen!" the congregation replied again.
The priest sat down and the music minister announced, "For our closing song, let's sing Hymn 362, 'We Shall Gather At the River'."
"AMEN!" The congregation replied.
