Humorous Amaze Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life
I was amazed
As I get older, I never stop learning new things every day. I'm a new dad and the other day I was changing my baby when all of a sudden my kid rolls off of the changing table. As if animal instincts kicked into me in that split moment, or super powers of sorts, I swoop down with lightning speed and catch him INCHES off of the ground! Still to this day I'm amazed; I had no idea babies could bounce that high off of marbled flooring.
Amazed
One night a wife found her husband standing over their baby's crib. Silently she watched him. As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions: disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, skepticism.
Touched by this unusual display and the deep emotions it a**..., with eyes glistening she slipped her arm around her husband."A penny for your thoughts," she said."It's amazing! " he replied. "I just can't see how anybody can make a crib like that for only $146.50. "
I'm AMAZED by mythology. I'll tell you about my favorite tales...
if you have a minotaur two. (amazed... get it?)
A man goes to buy his wife a car...
The salesman ask him "why don't you buy her a Kaiser and surprise her?"
The man rejects the idea, so the salesman says "why don't you buy her a Fraiser and amaze her?"
The man thinks for a second, and says "nah, I'll just buy her a Tucker."
I was amazed by the Netflix show "You"
Sometimes, all i think about is You, late nights in the middle of June.
Amazed by the stunning beauty of their new secretary, two corporate executives resolved to make her adjustment to her new firm their personal business...
It's up to us to teach her the difference between right and wrong, said the first executive. Agreed, exclaimed the second. You teach her what's right.
Amazeballs is millennial for "cool",
But it's also Native American for "hush puppies".
You know what amazes me?
A maze.
I was amazed to find out that Europeans use whiteboards the same way as Americans...
They just pick up the marker, Denmark on it.
Old folks home
Three old fellas are seated on the front porch of their old folks home. The first one says " I like this place but the only problem I have is I can't pee first thing in the morning. " The second guy says I like our place too It's really really nice but I can't p**... first thing in the morning. " The third guy says about 6:00 every morning I pee like a racehorse. And then about 8:00 in the morning I c**... so good it would amaze you. Only problem I have is I don't wake up till 9:00.
Some days I amaze myself.
Other days I look for my phone while I am holding it.
You can explore amaze raucous reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean amaze necktie dad jokes. There are also amaze puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Local mom discovers innovative uses of dog f**....
Number 2 will amaze you.
I'm always amazed at how a cat can lick his own nuts.
So I decided to try to do it myself... but he bit me.
I am amazed with Bethesta's new game.
I have never seen anyone Fallout this hard with their audience.
I'm always amazed when I see a label saying "Made in China"
How can so many large things be made inside China dishes?
