Amanda Jokes
40 amanda jokes and hilarious amanda puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about amanda that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Amanda Short Jokes
Short amanda jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The amanda humour may include short carol jokes also.
- Sort of clean joke Amanda Bynes changed her name to Da Bynes because she's an independent woman who don't need Aman
- In exchange for eternal youth, Amanda promised a witch her firstborn child. Amanda's a lesbian.
- In Dublin, a very nervous Liam brings his girlfriend to meet his father for the first time. Liam (to father): This is Amanda
Father: A fooking WHAT!? - A Glaswegian takes his new girlfriend home to meet is father "This is Amanda" the guy says
"It's a f*ckin what?" Replies his father - What do you call a political conservative woman who is required to always be there? Amanda Tory
- one tiem i was talking to my liberal friend, amanda she got offended when i said "white male"
- I'm the most hated person in the Senate Ted Cruz: I'm the most hated person in the Senate.
Susan Collins: Hold my beer.
Brett Kavanaugh: Who said beer?
Twitter repost @Amanda_Kerri
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Amanda One Liners
Which amanda one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with amanda? I can suggest the ones about blah and honeydew.
- What did the guitar and banjo name their daughter? Amanda Lynn
- We had a mandatory meeting at work today Tory and Amanda weren't even there!!!!
- For someone who's name is Amanda Victoria A nickname is Manda Tory
- Hello, I'm Amanda Laurie-Anne! Mando: Hi. Me too.
- What do you call a man disguised as a woman? Amanda
- What should you call a female that wants to be a male? A man, duh.
(Amanda) - Why did the Italian foreign exchange student lock their door? Just in case Amanda Knox
- Amanda Knox... But nobody answers
- Amanda I knew a girl called Amanda who climbed inside a mandarin. Amanda in a mandarin.
- The dog from Britain's Got Talent has died R.I.P Amanda
- How is Amanda Bynes planning to redecorate her apartment? With the back of her head.
- On a scale of 1 to Amanda Jones how bad was your day?
- What was Amanda Todd's favourite anime? Naruto.
- If I had a girl name it would be Amanda... Yes. Amanda B. Reckonwith
- What do you call a woman who gets a s**... change? Amanda
Heartwarming Amanda Jokes that Make You Laugh
What funny jokes about amanda you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean elope jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make amanda pranks.
A blond man walks into a bar
He sees a very attractive woman sitting by herself, so he goes over to introduce himself.
"Hello miss, my name is Billy. Can I buy you a drink?"
She says, "I'm Amanda."
The man says, "Oh, I'm sorry to bother you, sir." and leaves.
Amanda is 21 years older than her son John. In 6 years from now, Amanda will be 5 times as old as John. Where is John's father?
Let M be the age in years of Amanda now.
Let C be the age in years of John now.
Then:
M = C + 21
M + 6 = 5(C + 6)
⟹ C + 21 + 6 = 5(C + 6)
⟹ C + 27 = 5C + 30
⟹ -3 = 4C
⟹ C = -3/4
John is -3/4 years old, which is -9 months old.
So, right now, John's father is inside Amanda.
Amanda: Fred, honey, in your bathroom I found two towels, one with a letter A embroidered on it and another with an F. How thoughtful of you! I used the one with an A, because F is for Fred…
Fred: F is for face.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the worst name a t**... could choose?
Amanda
My 8 year old cousin asked me if I wanted to hear a joke
Amanda: "I want to tell you a joke. Okay:
A snowman wants to go on vacation.
He wants to go to Chile because he thinks it will be chilly--BUT--he actually lands in a bowl of chilli.
Then he dies."
Amanda frowned at the man who had just proposed to her.
"I'm sorry Mike," she said. "I just can't marry you."
"Why not?" He asked. "Is there someone else?"
The frown deepened. "Oh Mike... there must be."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What was Amanda Todds favorite cocktail?
s**... on the bleach.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why should Caitlin Jenner's name be Amanda?
Because he's a man, duh
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why is "Amanda" the perfect name for a trans man?
Because she's a man, duh!
A man visits a show of Amanda, the famous psychic and healer.
During the show Amanda walks to him, puts her hand on his shoulder and exclaims:
"You WILL walk!"
He says softly "But I'm fine, my legs already work."
She gestures dramatically and exclaims once more:
"YOU! WILL! WALK!"
The man decides to just play along, gets up and walks a small circle. The crowd goes nuts.
After the show he walks out, shakes his head and figures that this Amanda is just a fraud.
And then he discovered that his car got stolen.
