The Best 52 Alzheimer Jokes

Following is our collection of Alzheimer jokes which are very funny. There are some alzheimer amnesia jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these alzheimer forget puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Hey grandson, what's the name of that german man who makes me go crazy?

Alzheimer, grandma, Alzheimer...


This old guy and old lady are sitting in a nursing home when the guy turns to the woman and says "I bet you can't guess how old I am". The lady says "I'll bet I can, unzip your pants", so he does, she sticks her hand in, feels around, pulls her hand out and says "you're 83". The guy says "WOW! That's amazing! How'd you do that!?" the woman replies "you ask me the same question every day, Frank".

A man goes to the doctor

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says :"I've got bad news for you. You got AIDS and you got Alzheimer."

The man says :"Alzheimer,huh... well at least not AIDS"

I might have alzheimers...

...but at least I don't have alzheimers.

Son, who is that German guy who keeps hiding things in our house?

Alzheimer, granpa.


The doctor tells his patient: "Well I have good news and bad news..."
The patient says, "Lay it on me Doc. What's the bad news?"
"You have Alzheimer's disease."
"Good heavens! What's the good news?"
"You can go home and forget about it!"

What's an Alzheimer patient's favorite horror movie?

The Blair...Which project?
[Made my roomie laugh at least]

The doctor comes to a patient

Doc: You have cancer and alzheimer.
Patient: That's fine, atleast i don't have cancer.

What's the name of that German guy that keeps hiding my stuff around the house?

Alzheimer, Grandma.

Son, what was the name of the german guy that hides my stuff?

Alzheimer grampa Alzheimer

Honey, what is the name of that German that hides things around the house?

Alzheimer grandma, Alzheimer!

Top Alzheimer Puns and Funny Jokes

You can explore alzheimer parkinson reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean alzheimer elderly dad jokes. There are also alzheimer puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Welcome to

Forgot your password? Of course you did.

How can you tell if someone has Alzheimer's?

A. How can you tell if someone has Alzheimers?

Grandma asks her grandson:

"Sonny, for the love of God I can't remember what's the name of that German fellow who keeps hiding stuff around the house?"

"It's Alzheimer, grandma. It's Alzheimer."

Grandad: hey Sonny, what's the name of that German?

Grandson: for the thousandth time grandad, it's Alzheimer

A doctor tells his patient his results...

A doctor goes to his patient and tells him:"I have bad news for you.
First, you have cancer, and second, you have Alzheimer disease.
I am really sorry for you." The patient says:"At least I don't have cancer"

Having Alzheimer also carries some advantages...

First of all, you get to know someone new every time you look in the mirror. Secondly, you can always enjoy an old joke as if you heard it for the first time. And finally, you get to know someone new every time you look in the mirror.

-Sir,you have Cancer and Alzheimer

-At least I don't have Cancer...

Today I made this one without knowing it at first...

I always keep forgetting unimportant things and my friend asked me: "Does someone in your family have alzheimer?"

Me: "Not that I would know..."

My friends starts laughing, I realize why and join in.

The worst mix of diseases?

Alzheimer and diarrhea. You run but you don't remember where.

The best thing about having Alzheimer is...

Because they can't C#.

Doctor says to his patient "you have cancer and Alzheimer"..

Patient looks at him and says: "At least I don't have cancer."

There are 3 perks of having Alzheimer

1. You can make new friends every day.
2. You can look for the Easter eggs you hid yourself.
3. You can make new friends every day.

A man goes to the doctor

Doctor: Okay, I have 2 messages for you. The first one is, you have lung cancer, the second one, you have alzheimer.

Man: Thank god, atleast not cancer.

God has an alzheimer

He gave black people beatiful white teeth but forgot about giving them reasons to smile

It's Alzheimers day on thursday...

It's Alzheimers day on thursday...

At the doctor's

After a lot of medical tests the doctor says to the patient:

"I have 2 bad news for you. First is, you have cancer. The second one is you have Alzheimer". To which the patient answers : " Thanks god its not cancer"

Alzheimer and diarrhoea together are the worst.

You run to the toilet but can't remember why.

The doctor had 2 bad news for me

I have Cancer and Alzheimer. Thank God I don't have Alzheimer.

The 19th of December is the anniversary of the death of Alois Alzheimer

But no one ever remember it

December 19 was the 102nd anniversary of the death of Alois Alzheimer.

But of course no one remembered.

Honey, what's again the name of that German I am out of my mind about?

Alzheimer, grandma, Alzheimer...

What's good about Alzheimer?

You make new friends every day.

What would JOKER say if he had Alzheimer?

"Do you know how I got these scars?"

I may have Alzheimers,

but at least I don't have Alzheimers!

Better to have Parkison's than Alzheimer

I would rather drop a bit of my beer than forget to drink it!

What did the old man with Alzheimer say?

What did the old man with Alzheimer say?

What is the worst present for a person with Alzheimer?

A boomerang.

An old man asks his grandson "What was that German who keeps hiding my stuff called?"

The grandson replies "Alzheimer".

Why did the person with alzheimer sue eggo

He found a fork in his pancake

There's this German guy who hides everything from me

His name is... umm... uhh... Alzheimer!

This German dude that lives with me keeps hiding all of my stuff.

My doctor told me his name is Alzheimer.

What does the alzheimer patient say after he's done eating?

"I wonder what's for lunch."

Doctor: i have good and bad news for you.

Patient: bad news first...
Doctor: you have Alzheimer.
Patient: and the good news??
Doctor: You won't remember when you leave the room

Someone with Alzheimers tells a joke

Wait... What was I talking about again?

Alzheimer jokes are not funny

To get to the other side

A doctor is reading out tests results to an elderly patient.

- Sir, the two test results are in and I'm afraid I have bad news. First of all, you have phase 8 terminal metastasized cancer.
- Oh no.. damned, this is not good.. what else?
- You also have quite a severe case of Alzheimer.
- oh thank god for that! I thought you were going to tell me I had cancer.

What is the difference between a pilot and a person with Alzheimer?

What is the difference between a pilot and a person with Alzheimer?

Grandma yells across the room: "Billy, what's the name of that german guy who drives me crazy?"

"It's Alzheimer, grandma".

If you have Alzheimer...

just forget it.

A Grandmother Asks His Grandson: Hey, what is the name of that german guy that always hides my stuff?

Alzheimer, grandma, Alzheimer.

Alzheimers, its a bad thing...

...but atleast you get to meet new people everyday.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the alzheimer disease jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working alzheimer aids or alzheimers piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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