The Best 11 Allotment Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Allotment jokes. There are some allotment crohns jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these allotment distribute puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Allotment Jokes and Puns

"I own a small allotment...", So far I'm the only person I've heard laugh at this joke.

I own a small allotment. Every night someone throws soil in on top of in. I've absolutely no idea why.

The plot thickens.

I caught my neighbor putting a layer of topsoil on my allotment

The plot thickened

I went to an allotment yesterday to find more soil there than the day before. Today, I went there again and found even more soil..

The plot thickens...

This old man approached me. He said, "I planted some seeds somewhere and I can't remember what allotment."

"It's a synonym for 'many'," I replied, "but I can't help you with the first bit."

This old man approached me.

He said, "I planted some seeds somewhere and I can't remember what allotment."

"It's a synonym for 'many', but I can't help you with the first bit."


I went to my allotment and found that there was twice as much soil as there was the week before.

The plot thickens...

My friend was unconvinced when I told him someone keeps stealing soil from his allotment.

I thought he'd lost the plot.

Now someone keeps adding more and more.

The plot thickens.

Allotment joke, My friend was unconvinced when I told him someone keeps stealing soil from his allotment.

Every time I visit my allotment there's more and more soil

The plot thickens...

My grandad says every morning when he measures his allotment it's a couple of inches smaller than the day before.

I think He's slowly losing the plot.

I've heard today that the council intend to build house on the land where my allotment is.

I'm afraid I will loose the plot

I'm sure my allotment is conspiring against me. Each time that I trim it it grows back twice as harsh..

The plot thickens.

You can explore allotment confetti reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean allotment dug dad jokes. There are also allotment puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the allotment allot jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working allotment land piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes