Great Alli Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends
Alligator and genitals
A man walks into a bar with an alligator and says I will bet anybody that I can put my genitals into his mouth for 1 minute and take them out unharmed. Everybody put money into this and after 1 min he smashes a beer bottle on the alligators head and pulls his genitals out unharmed and offers anybody else a try. A woman puts up her hand and says "ill give it a try, but you gave to promise not to hit me on the head with a bottle."
How often do I see alligators?
Ocajunally
What did the Alligator say to the turtle?
Can I bayou a drink?
Which alligator lives in the arctic?
The refridgegator.

What happens after an alligator commits a crime?
You call an investigator
Two Alligators
So Two Alligators are eating a clown and one says to the other "Hey this taste funny?"
Why won't alligators attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy

An alligator decided to have unprotected sex...
Now he has Gatorades.
Why did the alligator go to Disney World?
To get some tots!
#toosoon?
Why was the alligator sad?
It had a kiddie meal but didn't get a toy.
How did the Allies have time to prepare D-Day?
Because Russia was Stalin
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Two alligators were murdered overnight in the swamp
Looks like we need an investagator to find out the culprit.
Why don't alligators use phones?
Because they don't know how to crocodile
An alligator had sex with a prostituteβ¦
Now he has Gatorades.
Where do alligators that can't accept the truth go?
Da Nile
Two alligators were swimming next to a law firm...
*

Most of the Alligator shoes sold are of low quality, so I went to the bayou to get my own
28 gators later and none of them are wearing any shoes
Mr. Alligator was 45, single, and a rampant alcoholic.
He had hit croc-bottom.
If two alligators have reach an agreement...
... do they have a crocodeal?
Alligators can live up to 100 years...
Which is why there's an increased chance that they will see you later.
I wish I could use alliteration but,
All attempts are always acknowledged as atrocious anyways.
I should just stop trying, I'll never do it.
Why did the alligator and crocodile leave the olympics so upset?
They both cayman last.
Why couldn't the alligator mate?
He had e-reptile dysfunction.
How to tell a alligator from a crocodile
One will see you later
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator
Alligators can grow up to 20 feet
But most of them only grow four

An Alligator sees you later, a Crocodile sees you in awhile. When does a Caiman see you?
This isn't a joke, I want answers. Please. I've never wanted to know anything more.
What is your best "See ya later alligator / in a while crocodile" line?
I figured this was the best place to ask. Sorry if this isn't allowed.
My alliterative pedofilic uncle won't shut up about my sister
Every time he sees her he goes: "Look at the knees on my niece, Denise!"
Alligators can grow up to 15 metres...
The joke doesn't work with the metric system...
My massage therapee asked how long I have been a meseur for.
I guarentee you all...I am not now nor have ever been French.
Why couldn't the alligator get it up
He suffered from ereptile dysfunction
We had to get a new all-in-one printer, after a lot of fighting.
The old one couldn't handle the fax.
What is an alligator that likes to start fight's favorite social media platform?
Instagram, because they're an insta-gator.
Some Alligators can grow up to 15 feet
but most only have 4.
What does a alligator say to human walking away?
See you later masterbaiter...
What did the alligator say to show support for his friend?
I'm right bayou-r side
If someone says see you later alligator you must respond with in a while crocodile
It's in the bye laws
If an alligator lives in a river and thinks he's a crocodile
There's a good chance he's in da-nile!
Did you know alligators can grow up to 22 feet?
But most of the time they just grow 4.
What did the alligator get after sleeping with a hooker
Gatoraids
What does an alligator drink when hurt?
Gator-Aid.
Alligators can live up to 100 years
Which is why they have an increased chance of seeing you later
An alligator asked an electric eel, hey, can I touch you?
Electric eel: Yes, but I'd have to charge you.
Alligator in a bar
Says to the bartender, see that woman over there? I'm gonna eat her.
Bartender says you do and you'll fall fast asleep.
In disbelief the Alligator does just that. Eats the woman and proceeds to fall asleep for some time. Wakes up befuddled and asks the bartender how did you know?
Bartender says easy,
Thats a bar bitch you ate