All Sans Jokes

112 all sans jokes and hilarious all sans puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about all sans that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest All Sans Short Jokes

Short all sans jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The all sans humour may include short sans jokes also.

  1. What do you call a waffle you drop in the desert? San Diego
    ^^^^^i'll ^^^^let^^^^myself^^^^out
  2. Where are you when you're eating an Eggo on the beach and you drop it in the sand? San Diego
    (thought of this myself, it's better spoken)
  3. Why did the non-binary prospector go to San Francisco in 1849? 'Cause there was gold in them/their hills!
  4. The Chief of Police died responding to people changing font on town signs There we were, left sans-sheriff
  5. There used to be a mechanic shop in San Diego called Car Men Now we don't know where in the world it is
  6. If an angel statue is removed from a fountain... ...would that make it a sans seraph font?
  7. With the second lockdown looming, I saw a man purchase 3 crates of San Miguel, 2 bottles of tequila, 6 bags of paella and a sombrero. I think hispanic buying.
  8. My Japanese friend bought a new Sentra and named it 123 When I asked why 123, he replied with
    "Ichi Ni san"
  9. I made an Undertale comic, but it's all about sans Well, I guess, you can call it Comic Sans
  10. A girl in Japan had an older sister who owned a car company. What was that company? Nee-san

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All Sans One Liners

Which all sans one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with all sans? I can suggest the ones about sons and topless.

  1. What kind of car does a Weeaboo drive? A Nii-san
  2. What do you call a group of senior Japanese comedians? Comic Sans
  3. TIL there's a city named after a waffle dropped on the beach San Diego
  4. Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender yells, "we don't serve your type in here."
  5. What's Robin hood's favourite font? Sans Sheriff!
  6. What was Bob Marley's favourite font? Sans Sheriff!
  7. What kind of car did Mr. Miyagi drive? Focus, Daniel-san
  8. My dad has the heart of a lion And a life time ban from the San Diego Zoo.
  9. What was Robin Hood's favourite variety of font? Sans-sheriff
  10. What do you call a waffle on the beach? A San Diego
  11. What do new IPhones have in common with San Diego? No Chargers.
  12. What is Bob Marley's Favorite Typeface? Sans Sheriff
  13. Name a city where no one is named Francisco? Sans - Francisco
    P.S. My First dad joke
  14. Why is it so cold in San Francisco? Giant fans.
  15. What's 3 9 in Japanese? san kyu
    You're welcome

All Sans Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about all sans you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pure jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make all sans pranks.

A sign on the Golden Gate Bridge reads: "Now entering San Francisco, chains required…

…whips optional"


Chuck Fullmer, 38, yesterday became the first American to get to grips
with the concept of sarcasm.

"It was weird" Fullmer said. "I was in London and like, talking to this guy
and it was raining and he pulled a face and said, "Great weather eh?"
and I thought - "Wait a minute, no way is it great weather".
Fullmer then realised that the other man's 'mistake' was in fact deliberate.
Fullmer, who is 39 next month and married with two children, aged 8 and 3,
plans to use sarcasm himself in future.
"I'm, like, using it all the time" he said.
"Last weekend I was grilling steaks and I burned them and I said
"Hey, great weather."

Did you hear about the albino clairvoyant master hypnotist from San Francisco?

He was a super pallid Cali mystic, expert at hypnosis.
(Today I had wanted to tell someone the Gandhi joke I read on here the other day, but I couldn't remember it so I made this up and thought I may as well share it even though it's purely derivative.)

Charlie the Street Car Conductor

Long joke that is passed down in my family
So down in New Orleans there lived a man named Charlie. Charlie ever since he was a young boy wanted to grow up to be a streer car conductor. When he finally became old enough, he applied for the job and lo and behold he got it. Now Charlie was the friendliest street conductor that the city has ever seen. Not only did he never complain about his job, but also he greeted everyone who boarded his street car and treated them like family. Everything in his life was perfect for Charlie until one day he decided to operate the street car after having a few drinks. In his drunken state, he crashed the streetcar and killed all the passengers. After going to court Charlie was sentences to death by the eletric chair. When the day came for his execution, a gaurd visited Charlie's cell and asked him what he wanted for his final meal. Charlie replied, "I want a rotten tomato and a raw fish." After Charlie finished his meal he headed into the execution room and sat down in the eletric chair. The warden gave the order to pull the switch and the room went dark as thousands of volts passed through Charlies body. After the switch was thrown back it came as a suprise that Charlie was in fact still alive. Having no idea what else to do the warden let Charlie out of jail but banned him from ever operating a streetcar in New Orleans. Since street cars were his life Charlie decided "Hey I'll go to Japan, I hear they have fancy new street cars there." In Japan Charlie gets a job as a conductor again, but as before decides that after having a few drinks that he is still able to work the street car. To no suprise Charlie crashes the stree car and kills all the passengers. Charlie again finds himself in jail ordering his last meal. "A rotten tomato and a raw fish," he tells the gaurd. After the meal was eaten, Charlie was led to the chair and once again survives the eletricity. Because he wasn't dying, he was set free but banned from operating the street cars in Japan. Charlie thought to himself, "Well I heard San Francisco still has street cars operating so I'll go there." As you can guess Charlie ends up in the same situation and again orders the same meal " A rotten tomato and a raw fish," he tells the gaurd. The warden from San Francisco had heard of Charlie and his previous death sentences so before he brought Charlie in to be executed he sent a letter to the mayor asking to reroute the city's eletricity to the jail. The mayor approved and confident with his new found power the warden smiled and gave the order to pull the switch. The lights in the room burst from the overload and the smell of something burning overwelmed the air. The warden after a minute ordered the gaurd to shut off the chair and as the smoke cleared, there was Charlie same as always. Distraught with emotion, the warden told Charlie to get out of his sights. Charlie, tired of going to jail, finally decided that maybe he shouldn't be a street car conductor after all. So Charlie travels back to New Orleans and meets his friend Thibodaux at a bar. Thibodaux after a few minutes of small talk tells Charlie "Everyone has heard about the eletric chair incidents and I just gotta axe, how were you able to survive all them jolts of electricity through your body? Was there something you did that made you resistant to it?" Charlie looks at Thibodaux and says "I dunno, I guess I was just a bad conductor."

Whose fault is it that California always has earthquakes?

San Andreas fault.

Man finds a Genie in a bottle

Man walking along the beach finds a bottle, opens it, out pops a Genie
"Ok, great you found me and all but im busy and you get One Wish. Take it or leave it"
"Well, jeez, I always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I hate flying, and I get sea Sick. How bout a highway from San Francisco to Hawaii"
"Are you nuts? Do you know how long a bridge that would be? How deep the pylons would go? Why the Engineering alone would be a Monumental undertaking....Pick something else, pick something else"
"Ok, I want to understand Women"
"So you want this to be a Two or Four lane highway?"

Ooh! Ooh! I have a current events joke!

Go easy on me im drunk.
When I heard that the A/C had gone out at the AT&T Center in San Antonio tonight for the NBA finals, I thought to myself... I guess this favors the Heat.

Be Careful Doing Drugs in Utah

I recently moved to Utah from San Francisco, and wasn't paying attention once when I wanted to party. I got my l**... mixed up with l**..., and instead of taking a Trip, I ended up on a 2 year mission to Fiji.

Who wins in a race to San Francisco, the lesbian couple or the gay couple?

The l**.... They get there lickity split while the g**... are still packin it in!

All the guys here in San Francisco are super nice.

They keep asking if they can push my stool in. Even when I'm already sitting down or there are no chairs around.

I watched the movie San Andreas today and I really enjoyed it

Despite its faults.

I Just watched San Andreas yesterday. Completely unbelivable.

I mean. The Central Valley was green.

What did San Andreas said to the Earthquake?

This is all your fault!

I was in a bar last night, saw this beautiful woman...

... like a supermodel.
I walked up, I was like "Hey, where you from? What do you do?"
She goes, "Oh, me, I live here in San Francisco. I am a brain surgeon."
I don't know if this makes me sexist but I was really impressed...
Most women... can't pull of sarcasm.

What US city has the dirtiest frozen waffles?

San Diego

I don't mind comic sans.

It's honestly a very well rounded font.

That's right

Half dressed r**... couple were sitting on couch watching news on TV, with the man's arm around the woman. The man says "Look at them homosexuals ruinin' the sanctity of our institution. We oughta go to San Francisco just to show them liberals that marriage means one man and one woman. Ain't that right, sweetheart?" The woman replies, "That's right, Daddy."

Trans-continental blonde ....

A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?' The agent replies, 'Just a minute.' 'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up.

Why did Europe start the first World War?

They did't like being sans-Ferdinand.

What font was used on Wyatt Earp's tombstone?

Sans Sheriff.

What do you call n**... from San Francisco?

Bay Aryans

Why are the "sans" family of fonts so serious?

No one wants to be comic sans.

How many heterosexual males does it take to screw in a light bulb in San Francisco?

Both of them.

It's 80 degrees in San Francisco today.

Girls are wearing skirts so short you can almost see their d**....

Who is Santa Claus?

Because if in Spanish, "Santo" or "San" is used for male saints...
(San Francisco, San Diego)
And "Santa" is used for female saints...
(Santa Monica, Santa Barbara)
Wouldn't that make Santa Claus t**...?

San Diego Comic Con and Dragoncon are going to pull their resources and merge into one event.

But it was called off because no one was happy with the con fusion.

What car does a japanese girl love to ride


I got a job as a stand up with a comic sans resume, but i lost my CV

Now im a comic sans resume

What do you call a fountain whose angel statue has been stolen?

A sans seraph font.

[Rogue One Spoilers] What is the empire's favorite kind of font?

Sans Scarif

What is the Empire's favorite font type?

Sans scarif

What city has the most people eating waffles on the beach?

San Diego

A Font Designer and a Police Officer Walk Into a Bar...

The font designer leaves sans sheriff.

Did you hear about the registered donor who had a car c**... on the Golden Gate Bridge?

He left his heart in San Francisco.

So, an Indian went to the US embassy

to get a visa for a visit to his friend placed there. When asked where he was going, he replied,"San Jose"...!
The immigration officer corrected that San Jose is pronounced ''San Hose'' ...J is pronounced as ''H''
'' So how long is your stay in San Jose?''
"7 months; from Hanuary to Huly."

I went to the US Embassy for a visa interview in Bangalore.

Officer: Where to in the US?
Me: San Jose
Officer: It's pronounced as "San Hosey". J is pronounced as H in the US
Me: Oh okay
Officer: So how long do you plan to be in the US?
Me: 7 months, from Hanuary to Huly

What kind of car does a Japanese horse drive?

A neigh-san

What is an outlaws favourite font?


What's a french criminal's favourite font?

Sans Sheriff

My favorite anime character

liam ni-san

I wrote an Undertale manga recently...

It's written in Comic Sans.

California hasn't fallen into the sea, so apparently it worked.

Back in the 1970's there was a cult in California who believed that they could save California by appeasing the San Andreas. There were parts of San Andreas that literally gaped open wide, and members of the cult were noted for throwing all their earthly possessions down into the amazingly deep cracks in the Earth's crust. Of course, skeptics accused the cult of being merely generous to a fault.

2 blondes are sitting on a bench in San Francisco...

One of the blondes says to the other. "Hey, which one is closer; New York or the moon?". The other blonde laughs at the stupidity of the joke.
"Well, duh! Can you see New York from here?"

I had trouble getting drunk off the coast of East Africa

Turns out Zanzibar is sans a bar.

What is Chewbacca's least favorite font?

Sans Solo.

Smart blonde joke

Whoah, I know. Here it is: so a blonde walks into a bank and asked to borrow a $500 loan. The bank needs some colleratal so she gives the bank her Rolls Royce. After a couple of months she comes back and promptly pays the loan back. The bank clerk asked why she borrowed the money if she could pay it back easily.
She said, "cheapest parking in San Francisco."

It's interesting how different parts of the country have different ways of saying the same thing.

For instance, in most parts of the country, having an income of $100k or more is called "making six figures".
However, here in San Francisco, we call that same thing "living above the poverty line".

What did the Japanese father say to his son when he got a bug bite on his knee?

You got an ichi-ni-san?

In New Orleans, an apple pie is $5.94, while in San Juan, it's $3.99.

These are the pie-rates of the Caribbean

My wife and I are finally planning a trip to San Francisco for my life long dream of seeing the Golden Gate in person.

She said, What are you going to do when you finally see it?
I said, Let's cross that bridge when we get there.

What was Mussolini's least favourite font?

Parti sans.

I just gave all my life savings to the San Andreas foundation.

You might say I'm generous to a fault.

Sports Teams should be named for what their city is famous for

For example: Dallas is known for cowboys, San Francisco was the place for the miners, 49ers, to bring their gold and claims, Islignton was famous as being home of the Artillery Regiment, thus "Arsenal," Milwauke HAD brewing.
Washington should change their name to "Senators," and Cleveland could become the "Steamers."

If this doesn't make you groan I don't know what will...

With 2nd lockdown looming in the UK, I saw a man with 4 cases of San Miguel, 5 paellas and 7 sombreros, I think Hispanic buying

The sheriff of a small Texan town pulled over a Porsche that was doing 60 miles per hour in a 30-mile an hour zone.

The man behind the wheel, a San Francisco law associate, was steaming. When he was finally brought before the local magistrate, he exploded, "I can't believe you stopped me. This town must be the a**... of the world!"
There was a five second pause as the magistrate looked at him. Then he asked, "You just passing through?"

Who's the law enforcement in the font world?

Sans Sheriff

I just heard that Tony Bennett has Alzheimers.

He left his heart in San Diego.

A passenger at an airport in New York was at the counter

-I'm going California for business, I want to go to Los Angeles, I want to send the big suitcase in my right hand to San Francisco and the smaller suitcase on ground to San Diego.
-Excuse me sir, but I'm afraid that's not possible, we can't do that.
-Great then, because that's what you did on my last flight.

At the Supermarket

Just saw a bloke in the supermarket buying 5 crates of San Miguel, 8 frozen paella and sombrero... I thought to myself Hispanic buying

With lockdown 3 nearly upon us...

I saw a guy with 12 cases of San Miguel, 5 Paellas and 7 Sombreros. I think Hispanic buying.

Buddy bought Superbowl tickets

A good buddy of mine has 2 Super Bowl tickets, 40 yard line box seats 20 rows up. He paid $4,500 each but he didn't realize when he bought them, it was going to be on the same day as his wedding. Probably because of the extra game this year.
If you're interested, he's looking for someone to take his place...It's at Calvary church in San Clemente at 3pm. The bride's name is Nicole, she's 5'4", about 115 lbs, very flexible and a decent cook too.
She'll be in the white dress.

TIL In 1836 a San Antonio pie maker fought with Mexican dairy farmers who tried to serve their pie with a newly developed frozen dairy product. While the pie maker ultimately lost, their valiant struggle is brought to mind any time people declare,

"Remember the à la mode"