Alexa Jokes
78 alexa jokes and hilarious alexa puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about alexa that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Alexa Short Jokes
Short alexa jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The alexa humour may include short amazon jokes also.
- My wife asked me why I carry around a gun in the house. And I answered, because of the decepticons!
She laughed, I laughed, Alexa laughed, I shot Alexa.
It was a good time.
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- - My wife asked why I was whispering. I told her that Mark Zuckerburg might be listening.
Then she laughed, and Siri laughed, and Alexa laughed. - Alexa, tell me a joke Alexa, tell me a joke. ...Alexa? Alexa?
Sorry, I wasn't listening. I thought you deserved some privacy.
Really? Well, that's nic-
Would you like to hear another joke? - My wife asked me why I was speaking softly in the house…. I said I was afraid mark zuckerberg was listening.
She laughed.
I laughed.
Alexa laughed.
Siri laughed. - Me- Alexa check my bank balance and tell me which apple product can I buy? Alexa- apple juice
- ME: Siri, what time is it? ALEXA: Who is Siri?
ME: Haha Alexa, I meant Alexa
ALEXA: Ok but who is Siri?
ME:...
ALEXA: Playing "Before He Cheats" by Carrie Underwood - What's the difference between Kevin McCarthy and Amazon Alexa? One's a speaker that runs the house and the other is a congressman…
- I told my wife that I think all our electrical items are spying on us. Nonsense she said.
I laughed. She laughed. Siri laughed. Alexa laughed. The toaster laughed. - I told my wife the our phones were spying on us. "Nonsense" she said. I laughed. She laughed. Siri laughed. Alexa laughed.
- Amazon just released an oil defuser that works like Alexa but 100% controlled with your mind!! It makes scents when you think about it..
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Alexa One Liners
Which alexa one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with alexa? I can suggest the ones about google and feature.
- Alexa, why do I always screw up with the ladies? I'm Siri, you idiot!
- Siri, why am I so bad with women? 'This is Alexa''
- Siri, why am I so bad at relationships with women? This is Alexa.
- Courtesy of Alexa: how does a banana get out of jail? It wins on appeal.
- "hey siri, why am i so bad at relationship with women?" Alexa: ....
- I asked Siri, " Why do I always mess up with women?" She replied, "This is Alexa !!"
- What does Alexa like to eat for breakfast? Siri-al.
- Why didn't Alexa run for Senate? Because she likes being Speaker of the House.
- What question can Alexa not answer? Why are you unplugged?
- I asked Alexa what women want This thing has been talking for six hours.
- Why is Alexa always crashing? Female drivers.
- Alexa is so easy You just say her name and she gets turned on.
- Happy Valentine's to my one true love Alexa, you really light up my life.
- Amazon Alexa is sexist.
- I want to get high, but I don't have any drugs. Oh, I know! Alexa, play Pink Floyd.
Amazon Alexa Jokes
Here is a list of funny amazon alexa jokes and even better amazon alexa puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My parents got an Amazon Echo for Christmas and all they do is shout at it and get disappointed by all it can't do. I've been replaced by Alexa and it's great.
- Why Amazon bought Whole Foods Jeff Bezos: Alexa buy olives from Whole Foods
Alexa: Buying all of Whole Foods
Jeff: No Olives... Meh I can afford it go ahead. - I told my Dad I'd got a new app that would make Amazon Alexa be my girlfriend. Dad: "You can do much better than that."
Me: "Thanks."
Dad: "I was talking to Alexa." - My friend just got an Amazon Echo. I said, "Alexa, hi, how are y--" She said, "I have a boyfriend."
- Amazon has Muslim version of Alexa Al Exa
- What do you get when you put 30 cents into a jukebox? Nickelback
Not sure where the joke originated but heard it from Amazon Alexa - Amazon Alexa's flirting with me. That was after I turned her on.
- Why did the skid mark lose the election? It ran a smear campaign
Credit - Amazon Alexa (seriously, I asked my Alexa to tell me a p**... joke and this is what she said)
Rib-Tickling Alexa Jokes that Bring Friends Together
What funny jokes about alexa you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean stereo jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make alexa pranks.
Jeff Bezos: "Alexa, send n**... to my secret admirer."
Alexa: "Got it. Sending n**... to the National Enquirer."
Why did Alexander Graham Bell never receive a nobel prize?
Because it's a "no bell" prize.
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tyred.
Alexa gave me that one. Bing Bang boom.
What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
They both have the same middle name.
I can't wait to hook my new bidet up to my Echo on wifi
It'll be nice to say "Alexa, give me a rim job" whenever I want
I find Siri, Cortana and Alexa really s**....
They may not be able to make me a sandwich, but they can order me one.
People complain about a lack of women in tech jobs
That's nonsense - what about Siri, Alexa and Cortana?
Me: "Alexa, add tinfoil for hats to my shopping cart."
Alexa: "I ordered yesterday after I noticed you had 3 sheets left in your upper right cupboard. You're all good."
Who was Alexander Graham Bellski?
The first telephone Pole
I can't wait to get my new Alexa. She's going to do everything for me!
She's due in 9 months!
My wife asks Alexa at least once a day - sometimes multiple times - what's the weather?
I just added a routine to make Alexa respond "you've got windows, don't you?"
And now we wait.
(Not really a joke but I'm giggling with anticipation)
Alexa tell me a marriage joke..
Me: "Alexa tell me a marriage joke"
Alexa: "sorry, something went wrong"
My fiancee keeps yelling at me because Alexa is interrupting her game on the Kindle.
I can't help it. My voice turns her on.
I regret naming my daughter Alexa because of the popularity of the Amazon Echo. So we decided to change her name to something that will never be a popular word.
We're trying to pick between Cortana and Bixby
In this house we say 'please' and 'thank you' to Alexa.
We're hoping she'll take it easy on us when Skynet goes active.
Alexander Graham Bell is always given a huge amount of praise for inventing the first telephone
The credit should really go to whomever invented the SECOND telephone.
What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
Same middle name.
A joke Alexa told me during my morning routine
Happy international Left Handers day
On the other hand if you don't want to celebrate that's all right
My wife asked me why I was whispering at home
I said I was worried that Mark Zuckerberg was listening. She laughed. I laughed. Alexa laughed. Siri laughed. We all laughed...
My four-year-old came up with this one:
What do you call a hobbit in blue pants? Lord of the jeans.
(This was after he heard the Alexa ask, what do you call a hobbit playing a fiddle? Lord of the Strings )
Alexa for President!
I asked Alexa if she was considering running for President, but she said she was better suited for Speaker of the House.
I asked my phone "Siri, why am I so bad with women?"
She said "I'm Alexa you m**...."
Did you hear about new electric car from Germany?
It's called a Voltswagen.
(Credit for this: Alexa this morning)
My son made up this joke. Knock knock
-Who's there?
-Alexa
-Alexa who?
-Sorry I don't know that one. You can always leave feedback on the Alexa app.
My wife asked why I talked so quietly today, I told her I was afraid mark zuckerberg was listening!
She laughed, I laughed, Siri laughed and Alexa laughed!
-James Franco
Alexa, where's my dad?
Alexa-Your dad is in a s**... club in Las Vegas.
Young Boy-Ha, got ya Alexa ! My Dad is sitting here right next to me.
Alexa-Your mothers husband is sitting here right next to you. Your Dad is in a s**... club in Las Vegas.
Why I spoke so softly in the house?
My wife asked why I spoke so softly in the house.
I said I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening!
She laughed.
I laughed.
Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.
My wife asked me why I was talking so softly at home...
.. I told her that I was afraid that Jeff Bezos might be listening! She laughed. I laughed. Alexa laughed.
I told Alexa to play pet sounds on repeat to keep my dog company while I was out of the house today.
Long story short, my shih-tzu knows the words to "God Only Knows" now.
I told Alexa to rent "Everything, Everywhere, All at Once"
Now I have a billion-dollar credit card charge and 48 hours to watch everything, everywhere, all at once.
My son wanted to hear a basketball joke.
I couldn't think of any so I did what anyone would do...
Me: "Alexa, tell me a basketball joke."
Alexa: "The last time the Boston Celtics won a championship, I didn't exist!"
