Following is our collection of funniest Alex jokes. There are some alex rebecca jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these alex xan puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
**ME:** *(spraying a mouthful of popcorn)* WHAT IS A DOORKNOB?!
Matt - Wow, what a surprise! I have been sleeping with him for half a year, but never knew he was a professor...
David: "Hi mate just checking in, u k?"
Sam: Your boyfriend seems real nice.
Alex: Yea, he's the best!
Sam: He seems a little TOO nice though, can't be all that exciting in the bedroom.
Alex: Not true, what they say about nice guys is true you know.
Sam: What's that?
Alex: Nice guys ALWAYS finish last.
Two guys are at a bar. One of them looks to the other and says, "I had the best time last night. I had sex with twins!" The other asks, "How could you tell them apart?" "Well, Jessica had long, beautiful, blonde hair, and Alex had a goatee.
Because it's a "no bell" prize.
Take your time, there's no Rush...
He got Aaron Burnt
The patron tells the waiter "this coffee tastes like mud". The waiter replies "yes sir, it is fresh ground".
A woman had five sons: Alex, Bill, Chad, Doug, and Eric. One day, the woman gets a phone call from the hospital. The doctor says, "I'm so sorry to tell you this, but your son was in a car accident and broke his leg."
"Oh no!" She responds, "Which one?"
The doctor answers, "The left leg."
Alex Trebex?
His job is in jeopardy.
You can explore alex salmond reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean alex dani dad jokes. There are also alex puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Relish today...
And Ketchup tomorrow
They both have the same middle name.
The teacher asked Alex if something was wrong, since he wasn't out with the others.
"It's because I'm in love with you, Alex told her.
"Well," the teacher replied - "What If I don't like small children?".
"Then...we'll just have to be careful, I guess".
When the boy got home he found his parents on the couch.
"Mom, Dad, what do you think about abortion?" He asked.
"I don't know," replied his dad, "ask your sister."
"I don't have a sis-"
(Thanks to my friend, Alex, for telling me that joke.)
My friend Alex House hates when I go to his basketball games
I know that because Alex Jones told me so
"Becausr your mother likes roses."
"Thanks dad"
"No problem Alex."
You just say her name and she gets turned on.
Like how Maddie is short for Madeline or Alex for Alexander
- But wait, how do you get 'Dick' from 'Richard?'
You ask nicely
oooh im sorry, the correct answer was yes
his career will be in jeopardy!
'Cause he's not throwing away his pot.
Alexa: "I ordered yesterday after I noticed you had 3 sheets left in your upper right cupboard. You're all good."
The first telephone Pole
most of the time...his life was in Jeopardy!
I picked her sister, her cousin, and our neighbor because men are simple like that.
What is a good thing to hear in church, but not so much in a Mexican prison?
A real 10/10.
Said Sir Alex
Crosby sits down in the theater room, and waits for Ovechkin. Ovechkin finally walks in, and is drinking a cup a water. Crosby says "Hey can i get something to drink?". Ovechkin responds sorry I only have one cup.
Actually it was A Rod
Me: "Alexa tell me a marriage joke"
Alexa: "sorry, something went wrong"
Looks like the shoe's on the other futa now!
Where would you hide it?
The same water the gay frogs drink
But I don't think he and his friends find Alex Jones funny.
"Salmutations."
You could say that he died with a Burr
As they are waiting to see if God will allow Alex into heaven, Jesus says:
"Alex, while we wait you can ask me any question and I will answer it".
So Alex asks him, "who planned 9/11?"
And Jesus responds "Osama Bin Laden"
Alex goes " wow, this goes higher up than I thought."
My mom was going to name me 'Alec,' but she knew I was going to be fat.
So she decided to make my name plural.
Female drivers.
What is making a joke about Alex Tribek's cancer diagnosis?
I'm sorry if this is against the rules but I'm first to speak at a speech I have to give and I was looking for a one liner I could introduce myself with. It should be something related to being first because my name is Alex and it's in alphabetical order.
it really IS a **prisonplanet** we're living on
The credit should really go to whomever invented the SECOND telephone.
Same middle name.
Melissa: "6"
Teacher: "Idiot! Sit down!"
Alex: "7"
Teacher: "Even stupider! Sit down too!"
At the back of the class, Karen, the only one shaking her hand in the air.
Teacher: "Ok, Karen. What is 2+2?"
Karen: "4"
Teacher: "Yes! Finally! Show the other idiots how you got your answer."
Karen: "Well, I subtracted 12 from 7"
Alex Jones was on Joe Rogan
Alexa- apple juice
I asked Alexa if she was considering running for President, but she said she was better suited for Speaker of the House.
I'm Siri, you idiot!
Patient- thank you, but I am not Alex.
Doctor- I am.
He had to hurry and get to heaven before Connery found his Mother.
Because most people don't want to put their life in Jeopardy.
He didn't want to make a rash decision.
It was sole-destroying.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the alex aleck jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working alex evan piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.