The Best 35 Alarm Clock Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Alarm Clock jokes. There are some alarm clock jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these alarm clock puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Alarm Clock Jokes and Puns

Dear Humans,

You get mad at me when I work....You get mad at me when I don't work.

Sincerely,

Confused alarm clock.

Did you guys hear about the kid getting arrested for bringing a clock to school?

Sources say that the teachers were alarmed.

Why did the emo swallow an alarm clock?

So he could wake up inside.

You're the only reason I get out of bed in the morning. I only go to work and become a better person because of you. You make me workout on weekends and get in shape. And I try to turn you on every night.

I love you, alarm clock.

I invented a SJW alarm clock.

It not only tells you the time, it reminds you what year it is, too.


For his birthday, I got my son an alarm clock that swears at him instead of beeping.

He's in for a rude awakening.

I'm inventing an alarm clock. When it goes off, it shouts, "9-11 WAS AN INSIDE JOB!"

That ought to wake people up.

Justin Bieber....

I have recently changed the sound of my alarm clock to "Justin Bieber - Baby". Now I wake up 5 minutes earlier every day, so I don't have to listen to it.

How to fall out of love with an ex-girlfriend?

Set her voice as your alarm-clock ringtone.

A teenage boy is like an alarm clock

Comes in handy once a day

What's the only thing that can ruin your perfect relationship with your crush?

The alarm clock

You can explore alarm clock reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean alarm clock dad jokes. There are also alarm clock puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


For her birthday, the only gift I got my wife is an alarm clock that swears at her instead of beeping.

She's in for a rude awakening.

For her birthday, I got my wife an alarm clock that swears at her instead of ringing.

She's in for a rude awakening.

How does a blonde set the time on her alarm clock?

She waits until midnight and plugs it back in.

Disclaimer: I know it's terrible, I was very young when I came up with it.

I was sick of my alarm clock so I bought a rooster...

But now I'm starting to think I got a gay rooster. Instead of saying "cock-a-doodle-doo" in the morning, he says "any-cockle-doo"

The alarm went off when I was trying to have sex...

I was Clock-Blocked

I'm tired of this one night stand mentality in college...

I have multiple lamps and alarm clocks, I need at least two night stands.

What is the difference between a baby and a alarm clock?

You only have to hit the alarm clock once to make it be quiet...

Rumour...

I heard a rumour that a man in town is selling a fake bedside-clock.

It's a false alarm.


I bought my wife a alarm clock which abuses you instead of ringing bells.

She's in for a rude awakening.

What do you call an alarm that's been muted?

Clock blocked

My alarm clock isn't in a good mood...

It just went off on me

Try this one trick to last longer in bed!

Throw out your alarm clock.

What is the worst kind of alarm clock?

The rumble strips.

Got up in the middle of the night, and couldn't find my alarm clock

Checked the time on my cell phone, it was 4:04. Made sense.

I put your name on my alarm clock...

every time I wake up I get to smash you

Have you heard about Trumps revision of Obama phones?

You'll be able to trade them in for a alarm clock and job application.

What do you call an alarm clock that doesn't have a snooze button?

A toddler

Imagine if you would hit the clock in the morning and the clock would hit you right back.

I think it would be truly alarming.

I set my alarm clock password to me and my wife's wedding anniversary

Needless to say, I haven't slept in weeks.

I was an hour late for work

I told them that Russia hacked my alarm clock and now I still have a job for the next two years while my boss
appoints a special investigation to look into it :)

Why do Jedi hate alarm clocks?

Because of The Force Awakens.

Was having an argument with my wife.

Just as I was about to win the argument, my alarm clock went off.

I bought a fancy new clock radio today.

It cost me alarm and a leg.

Scientists called it a big bang, Chuck Norris called it an alarm clock.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the alarm clock jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working alarm clock piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes