Al Qaeda Jokes

54 al qaeda jokes and hilarious al qaeda puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about al qaeda that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Al Qaeda Short Jokes

Short al qaeda jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The al qaeda humour may include short islamic terrorists jokes also.

  1. So I heard that the hacker "Anonymous" are waging war on ISIS and al-Qaeda... Quite ironic that 72 virgins will be attacking the terrorists!
  2. Whats the difference between an al qaeda training camp and a school? I dont know, I just fly the drones.
  3. What's the difference between a pakistani middle school and an Al Qaeda training ground? I dunno, I just fly the drone.
  4. What's the difference between a Pakistani grade school and an Al-Qaeda training base? How am I supposed to know, I just pilot the drone
  5. If you can't afford healthcare... Go to an airport. They give free x-rays and mammograms, and if you mention al-Qaeda, they'll throw in a free colonoscopy too!
  6. What's the difference between a Pakistani elementary school and an Al Qaeda training camp? Don't ask me, I just fly the drone.
  7. Job interview with Al-Qaeda Had a job interview with Al-Qaeda today.
    "Where do you see yourself exploding in five years? ", they asked.
  8. Al Qaeda has announced that they've captured Russian mercenaries in Mali. If they aren't paid $10 Million ... they'll release the mercenaries unharmed.
  9. What makes the Japanese better than Al Qaeda? At least the Japanese were considerate enough to bring their own planes
  10. The news is saying Al Qaeda is trying to make a comeback. Lets hope they don't try to play their greatest hits. ‬

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Al Qaeda One Liners

Which al qaeda one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with al qaeda? I can suggest the ones about osama bin laden and bin laden.

  1. What's the Al-Qaeda's favourite sports team? The New York Jets ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  2. what's al qaeda's favorite football team? The New York Jets
  3. What kind of pizzas did Al Qaeda deliver to the World Trade Center? Two large plains.
  4. ISIS and Al-Qaeda go to war with each other. Who wins? Everyone else
  5. What is Al-Qaeda's favorite sports team The new york jets
  6. Al-Qaeda captured a new place to house their men... It was a hostel takeover
  7. What do you call Al-Qaeda's April Fools prank? A jihahahad!
  8. how do you turn a pentagon into a tetragon? you apply the al'qaeda method
  9. What if Al-Qaeda was Jewish? They would get 72 cents in paradise.
  10. Hi, I'm Albert Qaeda. Friends call me Al.
  11. How do you get rid of Al-Qaeda? Give the goats STD's
  12. Football and touchy subjects What's Al'Qaedas favorite football team?
    The NY jets.
  13. How do you count in Al Qaeda? Skip the 10.
  14. The American Army have done tours of Afghanistan Al-Qaeda have done tours of the USA
  15. You know who really did 9/11? AL- qaeda

Hilarious Fun Al Qaeda Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about al qaeda you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean terrorist jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make al qaeda pranks.

Q: Why is Al Qaeda more compassionate than pro-lifers?
A: The 9/11 hijackers got to die instantly.

Was really suicidal, so I called the s**... hotline.

They patched me through to Al-Qaeda.

How do al-Qaeda like their toast?


AL-Qaeda hires a new aspiring recruit

they knew someday he is going to blow up.

President George W. Bush is sitting in his office...

...When one of his informants walks in to report,
"Mr. President, yesterday three Brazilian soldiers were killed by Al Qaeda."
Bush is silent for a moment as he holds his head in his hands in immense sadness.
"Sir, what's wrong?" asks the informant.
Bush brings his head up to look at the man and asks,
"How many is a Brazilian, exactly?"

What did the Al-Qaeda Star Wars fan say before blowing up?


3 spies, a french one, a british one, and an italian one, are captured by al-qaeda...

the terrorists tie each of them up and put the brit and the italian in a locked room. they take the frenchman to a room for 6 hours, torturing information out of him. when they finish with him, they take the brit to the room, who lasts 12 hours. they finally take the italian into the room, but as much as they t**... him, they cant get any information out of him.
the brit and the frenchman ask him how it goes and he says "i couldnt say anything." they ask him why and he says "my hands were tied!"

No one told him Syria borders Iraq

Why did Obama provide weapons to Al-Qaeda in Syria

What comes next in this sequence: 2,0,1,_?

I don't know, we'll need to ask Al-Qaeda.

Two conspiracy theorists die and go to heaven.

They ask God who did 911. God replies, "It was perpetrated by members of the Islamic t**... group Al Qaeda."
One whispers to the other, "Dude, this goes way higher than I thought."

69 years ago

both India and Pakistan got independence on this day.
Indians have become heads of Google, Microsoft, Pepsico, Jaguar, Land Rover and
Pakistanis have become heads of Taliban, Al-Qaeda, Jammat U Dawa, Hijbul Mujahideen
Also India entered Mars but Pakistan still trying to enter India.

A conspiracy theorist dies and goes to heaven...

When he arrives at the Pearly Gates, God is there to receive him. "Welcome. You are permitted to ask me one question, which I will answer truthfully."
Without hesitating, the conspiracy theorist asks, "Did Bush do 9/11?"
God replies, "Bush did not plan the attacks. 9/11 was perpetrated by Al-Qaeda and orchestrated by o**... Bin Laden. No bombs were planted in the Twin Towers, and no missiles hit the Pentagon. The U.S. government had no foreknowledge of the attacks whatsoever."
The conspiracy theorist thinks to himself, *this goes even deeper than I thought...*

An al-Qaeda s**... bomber carried out his mission...

And made it to heaven, where he found 72 virgins. Turns out they were all guys playing world of Warcraft.

The head instructor at the Al-Qaeda's training camp starts his lesson on s**... b**......

"Now listen up closely everyone be, I'm only gonna be showing this once".

jokes about al qaeda