Airliner Jokes

Funniest Airliner Short Jokes

Short airliner jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The airliner humour may include short airplane jokes also.

1. Do you ever wake up, kiss the person sleeping beside you, and be glad that you are alive? I did and apparently will not be allowed on this airline again...
2. UPDATE: United Airlines now offering a new addition to their inflight meals chinese takeout
3. My seatmate on a flight was a woman. Ever the charmer, I asked, Does the airline charge you extra for sitting next to good-looking men?
   Yes, she said, but I wasn't willing to pay.
4. I heard some guy tell two terrible Malaysian Airline jokes... The first one got no response and the second one was shot down in flames
5. I showed the damaged remains of my luggage to my lawyer and said, I want to sue the airline. You don't have much of a case, he replied.
6. Breaking News: In a press media briefing, United Airlines ceo Oscar Munoz has stated... "Since we cannot beat our competitors, we have resorted to beating our customers".
7. Things that will get you kicked off an United Airlines flight: 1)Wearing leggings
   2)Having an United Airlines ticket
   -Dan Regan
8. On the bright side of this United Airlines ordeal. At least they won't have any more problems with overbooking.
9. What's the difference between game of thrones and United Airlines? One has dragons and the other has drag-offs
10. It's a shame Carrie Fisher was on a United Airlines flight when she had her heart attack. If she was on another airline there might have been a doctor on board.

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Airliner One Liners

Which airliner one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with airliner? I can suggest the ones about air plane and airlines.

1. How do you milk a sheep? Sell headphone for $549.
2. Why are you flying with United Airlines? Beats me.
3. Anyone need a job? I hear Malaysia Airlines is looking for people.
   ^im ^so ^sorry
4. What do you call a plane that flies backwards? A receding airline.
5. United Airlines will treat you like a King! Rodney King, that is.
6. "I'm getting sick of eating airline food all the time." Said the Malaysian shark.
7. What's the deal with airline food these days... nothing but knuckle sandwiches.
8. How To Become a Millionaire: Be a billionaire and invest in an airline company.
9. Was going to do United Airlines joke But everyone already United Airlined me to it.
10. 4/5 doctors recommend united airlines You can't beat that!
11. Why was 1 afraid of 4? United Airlines.
12. How do Malaysian airlines serve all their drinks? On the rocks
13. What does R. Kelly have in common with Malaysian Airlines? They both think they can fly.
14. Did he travel with Scandinavian Airlines? No, he simply vanished into Finnair
15. I hate jokes about airline crashes They're just plane awful.

Commercial Airliner Jokes

Here is a list of funny commercial airliner jokes and even better commercial airliner puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A Commercial Airliner Crashes Into The Ground and Flys Off Again. Boeing!
• the new United Airlines Olympics commercial is really good But they forgot the part where Ryan Lochte kicks down the cockpit door and pees all over the flight deck.
• Delta airlines is probably chomping at the bit to get into the commercial space travel industry After all
  In space no one can hear you scream

Humorous Airliner Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life

What funny jokes about airliner you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean aeroplane jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make airliner pranks.