Great Aimlessly Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends
Two atheists were lost in a desert.
Two atheists were lost in a desert. They had run out of supplies and were wandering aimlessly.
One morning, they encountered a Muslim. The Muslim asked, "What are your names?"
The first, figuring the Muslim would be more likely to help a fellow Muslim, lied and said, "My name is Mohammed."
The second stayed honest and said, "My name is Dave."
The Muslim gave Dave a hearty breakfast. He turned to "Mohammed" and said, "Fasting is so hard, isn't it?"
The Bacon Tree
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States, wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says...
"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell? Ees bacon, I theenk."
"Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. "
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.
There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon... Every imaginable kind of cured pork.
"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree."
"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don't forget."
"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like
bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree."
And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath;
"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"
"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees it? "
"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree. Ees
Ees
Ees
Ees
Ees a ham bush...."
CEO spots a man wandering in a factory
In a factory, A man standing on the floor, not doing any work and looking aimlessly.
CEO of that factory came and asked his salary.
Man replied "5000 sir"
CEO took out his wallet and gave 15000 and told him
"I pay people to work and not to waste time, This is your 3months salary. Now get out of here. Never come back".
That guy left....
Then CEO asked workers, "Who was that guy?"
workers replied "PIZZA delivery boy, sir."
Star Trek Discovery is going to have a female lead which will ruin the series.
The male captains wandered around aimlessly getting into trouble.
She will just ask for directions and head straight to the destination.
A Christian missionary goes to proselytize in Africa and gets lost
So he goes aimlessly through thick forest and stumbles upon a lion. He gets scared the lion will eat him so he starts praying to God to protect him from the lion. Then, suddenly, he sees the lion praying as well!
He gets relieved and tells the lion: Brother! I didn't know you're a believer as well. I'm so glad, for a moment I thought that you might eat me
The lion responds: Quiet, please! Don't interrupt my mealtime prayer!
Two men saw a stranger walking with a large knapsack across the plains of Italy in 500 C.E.
Man 1: Why is that man walking around aimlessly whilst carrying such a heavy load on his back?
Man 2: He is not from around here, he is a nomad
Man 1: How can you be so sure?
Man 2: Isn't it obvious? Just look at him, he has a purpose for walking. If was walking aimlessly, he'd just be Roman
We are only a few weeks into self-isolation and it is really upsetting me to witness my wife standing at the living room window gazing aimlessly into space with tears running down her cheeks.It breaks my heart to see her like this. I have thought very hard about how I can cheer her up.
I have even considered letting her in - but rules are rules.

I saw six men with a coffin walking aimlessly around the cemetery
Looks like they had lost the plot
As I walked around aimlessly I realized something
If my life were a movie it would have pacing problem
Two astronauts are floating aimlessly through space when one of them starts giggling uncontrollably.
The other looks at him and says, "Do you understand the gravity of this situation?"
Why was the cow roaming aimlessly?
Because it was without it's significant udder.
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