Agonizing Jokes
10 agonizing jokes and hilarious agonizing puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about agonizing that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Comical & Quirky Agonizing Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What is a good agonizing joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A married couple are having a fight.
Finally the wife screams at the husband to get out of the house. She throws his suitcases at him and he packs his things. On his way out, the woman says, "I hope you die the slowest, most miserable, most agonizing death imaginable." So he turns and says, " What, so now you want me to stay?"
Chuck Norris got bitten by a King Cobra
And after 5 agonizing days of pain.
The cobra died
Lonely superman
So one day superman is flying around lonely when he noticed wonder women n**... on the beach having what looks like a w**....
He figures if he can fly down at the speed of light and do his business she would never even notice. After a few minutes he finally builds the courage and boom he goes in for the kill.
Wonder women in shock screams at the top of her voice "What the h**... was that?!" The invisible man in agonizing pain tells her "I have no idea but my a**... is killing me"
I was with my wife at mcdonalds drive thru and after 3 mins when they gave her our order she began complaining how agonizingly long the wait was.
Turns out reminding her that last night she told me 3 mins was way to quick was not a good response
A cartographer is asked to make a giant topographic map
He is very meticulous, agonizing over every little detail on the map. After months of work, he nervously presents it to his client, who says it's perfect and commissions another big project. As he leaves the meeting, the cartographer takes a deep breath, turns to his assistant, and says, "I was really worried he wouldn't like it, but that was a huge relief."
Abdul Ali was seriously injured in a car c**... & he has been on life support.
Today his family had to make an agonizing decision.
They closed the shop to visit him.......
A 30 year old jobless, homeless, broke guy went to a palm reading fortune teller to know when will his life be better.
Guy: How will my future be?
FT: Till you're 42, you'll suffer thinking about your life getting ruined, cleaned out, agonized, strapped, tortured, penniless, distressed, dirt poor, tormented, wasted, unproductive, exhausted, dried up and living a lifeless life.
Guy: So what happens after 42.
FT: You'll stop thinking about it.
Why did the straight line want to commit s**... by poisoning?
Because he wished to die-agonally.
What's the most bewitching shape?
A Hex-agon!!
I'm agonizing at the moment over whether I should use a contract killer
or stick with pay-as-you-go.
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