Aging Jokes

• Short Aging Jokes
• Aging One Liners
• Anti Aging Jokes
• Humorous Aging Jokes
• Seniors Jokes
• More Aging Jokes

Funniest Aging Short Jokes

Short aging jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The aging humour may include short aged jokes also.

1. I got pulled over by the police ... He came to the window and said papers ...
   I said - scissors, I win - and drove off
   He must be desperate for a rematch as he's been chasing me for ages!
2. My grandad asked me how to print on his computer... I told him it's Ctrl-P. He says he hasn't been able to do that for ages.
3. There are two kinds of people who care a lot about their exact age. Small children and 39 year old's.
4. Wife: Do men wipe after they pee? Aging husband: Yes. Wipe the floor, wipe the rim, wipe the wall…..
5. A 60 year old billionaire walks into a bar with his gorgeous 25 year old wife Friend: How did she marry you?
   Billionaire: I lied about my age
   Friend: You said 45?
   Billionaire: No! I said 90!
6. Made up by my elementary-aged kid: How do old people line up? In an elderly fashion. (So proud)
7. Alabama changed the drinking age to 34 They wanted to keep alcohol out of the high schools
8. TIL that they have raised the minimum drinking age in Arkansas to 32. It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools.
9. Vaccinated babies are 10 times more likely to die from heart disease, cancer, and alzheimer's. Keep kids from dying from old age, stop vaccinating today.
10. A German was going to a trip in France... He reached passport control and the officer asked:
    "Name?"
    "Hans Kleiner"
    "Age?"
    "31"
    "Occupation?"
    "No no, just visiting"

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Aging One Liners

Which aging one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with aging? I can suggest the ones about ages and getting older.

1. Why were the 'Dark Ages' so dark? Because there were so many Knights.
   Just delete me.
2. What did they call puberty in the middle ages? A midlife crisis
3. An average person loses virginity at the age of 17 I always knew I was above average
4. What do you call an aging actor who has finally paid off his house? mortgage freeman.
5. COVID is so bad in India... That i haven't got a scam call in ages
6. CIA finally succeeded in killing Fidel Castro Using the innovative 'Old age' technique
7. Like most people my age, I'm 23. .
8. Yo mama so old... ... I told her to act her age, and she died.
9. Why does the army need people under the age of 5? For the Infantry
10. Why were they called "the dark ages"? Because it was knight time.
11. My wife has the body of a woman half her age. I suppose I should call the police.
12. I asked my Dad, "Dad, what did you want to do when you were my age?" "Your mom's sister."
13. Deep sleep prevents aging. Especially when you are driving.
14. If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, what would he be famous for? Old age
15. What did the aging 007 say to his pharmacist? Bond. Gold Bond.

Anti Aging Jokes

Here is a list of funny anti aging jokes and even better anti aging puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Anti vaccinated kids show no sign of autism Because autism isn't detected until age 3
• I accidentally got anti aging cream on my block of cheddar I've now got milk all over the kitchen top
• Anti-vaxxers remind me of the show GLEE Both haven't aged well
• Did y'all hear about the Anti-vax kid who bought a Ferrari at the age of 2? Yeah, it was his midlife crisis.
• When I was 6, my sister was half my age. Now I'm 70, how old is my sister? 3. My mother became anti-vaxx.
• a race realist, a fascist, and an anti-feminist walk into a bar and order drinks. The bartender says, Sorry, we don't serve anyone under the age of 18.
• What do Anti-Vaxxers and their children have in common? They both stopped maturing at the same age.
• Why can't the children of anti-vaxxers go to bars? They never reach the drinking age.
• What do anti-aging creams have expiration dates... ...when they're anti-aging creams?
• My Mom's always going through phases, and it would have been great if she was an anti-vaxxer while I was growing up. I could have died a grueling death at the age of six. Valhalla.

Humorous Aging Jokes

Here is a list of funny humorous aging jokes and even better humorous aging puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years?
  A. Michael Jackson
• My aunt died, God bless her, at a ripe old age of 104.
  We called her Aunt Tique.
• Q: What's the best part about s**... with 28-year-olds?
  A: There are twenty of them.

Seniors Jokes

Here is a list of funny seniors jokes and even better seniors puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Just got a job as senior director at Old MacDonald's Farm... I'm the CIEIO
• carnival is offering a new voyage where you set sail and leave a bunch of senior citizens behind in the snow. It's called a Ted Cruise
• How do ukrainian snipers tell which Russians are the senior officers? The number of stripes on their tracksuits.
• What do you call a group of senior Japanese comedians? Comic Sans
• I just accepted a senior management position on the old MacDonald farm I'm the CIEIO
• A senior citizen is sitting at a bar.. A young woman walks in and sits down a couple seats over. The old man gets up, shuffles over to her, leans over and asks "So, do I come here often?"
• Where do senior citizens often go to the restroom? Depends.
• Just got a job as Senior Director of Old McDonald's farm. I'm their new CIEIO.
• What do you call it when 2 seniors stay up past their bedtimes? An election.
• Congratulations 2020 graduating class Reigning senior skip day champions!

Fun-Filled Aging Jokes to Boost Your Mood

What funny jokes about aging you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean older jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make aging pranks.