Aggressively Jokes
32 aggressively jokes and hilarious aggressively puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about aggressively that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Aggressively Short Jokes
Short aggressively jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The aggressively humour may include short vigorously jokes also.
- I saw a homeless man aggressively shaking a cup of coins at me this morning I get it. You have more money than me. No need to rub it in
- My French girlfriend is aggressively insisting we adopt a kitten She stormed into my room and said "I think it's time you and I had a little chat"
- Sure passive income is great, but do you know how much you can make with passive aggressive income? You know what, never mind. Forget I even mentioned it…
- The best method of passive aggressiveness is simply to include the person's name at the end of your sentence, Kathy.
- What did one passive aggressive republican say to the passive aggressive democrat? I don't know, let me go check my Facebook feed.
- We have a beautiful little girl who we named after my mom; in fact, Passive Aggressive Psycho turns five tomorrow.
- So I started a new band. We scream aggressively about how broke we are to heavy guitar riffs.
We're called Debt Metal. - How many passive aggressive people does it take to change a light bulb? Don't bother, I'll do it myself.
- How many passive-aggressive people does it take to change a lightbulb? Oh never mind, I'll just sit here in the dark...
- My crazy neighbour rang my doorbell aggressively at 3 A.M. I almost dropped my drilling machine!
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Aggressively One Liners
Which aggressively one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with aggressively? I can suggest the ones about forcefully and most aggressive.
- I'm not passive aggressive. Unlike *some* people.
- The first rule of passive aggressive club is... You know what, nevermind. It's fine.
- My horse was way more aggressive than usual today it threw me off
- Don't worry if you've forgotten the first rule of Passive Aggressive Club, it's fine.
- I hate passive-aggressive people. _You know what you did_
- I just watched my friend sweep a woman off her feet. He's a really aggressive janitor.
- I just swept a girl off her feet. I'm quite an aggressive janitor.
- Why are farmers aggressive gamblers? Because they raise the steaks.
- People say I'm too aggressive when I'm trading baseball cards. It's because I'm Ruthless.
- Today I aggressively plugged in my phone Needless to say, it got turned on.
- What do you call a hippo that tells other hippos to not be aggressive? A hippocrite.
- I said some stubtly racist stuff to a magpie She was a victim of my crow aggressions.
- What did the passive aggressive raven say to Edgar Allen Poe? "...ugh nevermind"
- I am not passive aggressive Unlike someone
- Can you people please stop being so condescending and passive-aggressive? Thanks!
Humorous Aggressively Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life
What funny jokes about aggressively you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean frantically jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make aggressively pranks.
Koi fish are incredibly intelligent, and naturally form groups of four fish, with each having a specialized role.
The group is always led by a leader fish , called koi A. The other three fish will follow it everywhere.
Koi B is in charge of hunting for the group, and will report back to them with the location of food.
Koi C is usually a large, aggressive female. She protects the group from threats, and asserts dominance over other groups of koi.
And if the fish are attacked, the other three swim away, and the predator always goes for the D koi.
Three women sat discussing their husbands and their s**... lives.
"My husband's a wrestler," said the first. "He's really strong and aggressive in bed."
"My husband's an artist," said the second. "He's really gentle and sensitive."
"My husband's an IBM salesman," said the third. "He sits on the edge of the bed and tells me how good it's going to be when I finally get it."
A town decided to form a clergy group to have Catholics, Jews, Protestants and Muslims gather to talk about various issues facing their places of worship.
The Rabbi went first and said they were having a terrible issue with squirrels. He said they were hanging around outside of church and aggressively begging for food. He said they were scaring their kids. The preacher said they were having the same issue, in fact, a few of the squirrels had actually gotten inside of the church and had done some damage to the roof. The Imam agreed saying that in fact one of the squirrels had bitten a few people at the mosque. The Priest then spoke up and said they used to have the same issue but had solved it. He said they took all of their squirrels, Baptized them, confirmed them, and now they only come around on Christmas and Easter.
An 85 year old man goes to his doctor for his annual checkup...
... Doc says, Mr. Jones, I have bad news and worse news.
"Whats the worse news?"
"You have a relatively large brain tumor that is very aggressive and the treatment options are almost nonexistent, so I'm afraid you have about 6 months to live."
Mr. Jones hangs his head for a couple moments and looks up to ask, "And the bad news?"
"you have Alzheimers."
Mr. Jones frowns and says, "well, at least I don't have cancer."
My dog can speak English.
My dog can speak English.
When I ask him how his day was, he says "rough!"
When I ask him what sandpaper feels like he says "rough!"
When I ask him where my golf ball went he says "rough!"
And when I ask him how aggressively he likes to play he says "I prefer to minimize the chance of injury"
A zookeeper notices his prize gorilla was getting aggressive..
She wouldn't eat. She wouldn't sleep. And she constantly kept trying to attack the zookeeper. So, he did some research and found out female gorillas can become depressed and aggressive when deprived from s**....
The zookeeper then looked around for another male gorilla for her to engage in i**..., but unfortunately the zoo couldn't afford to import a male gorilla just for her to have s**....
Giving his funding situation, he goes up to the janitor and asks him "Hey, for $500, would you have s**... with this gorilla?"
The janitor thought about it for a minute, and then replied "Sure, on three conditions. First condition, I don't want to kiss her."
"Okay sure! I wouldn't expect you to!"
The janitor then stated "Second condition. I don't want anyone knowing about this ordeal."
"Sure, fine! Not a problem! What's your third condition?"
Janitor said "Give me at least 2 weeks to come up with the $500"
