The Best 18 Aftershave Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Aftershave jokes. There are some aftershave lye jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these aftershave lotion puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Aftershave Jokes and Puns

Barack and Trump found themselves at a local barbershop. As the barbers finished their shaves, the one who had Trump reached for the aftershave. Donald was quick to stop him, saying, "No thanks. My wife, will smell that and think I've been in a brothel."

The second barber turned to Barack and said, "How about you, Mr. Obama?" Barack replied, "Go right ahead, my wife doesn't know what the inside of a brothel smells like.

"A Marine and his commanding officer.....!!!"

A Marine and his commanding officer were sitting in the barbershop. They were both just getting finished with their shaves, when the barbers reached for some after-shave to slap on their faces. The marine shouted, "Hey, don't put that stuff on me! My wife will think I've been in a whorehouse!" The commanding officer turned to his barber and said, "Go ahead and put it on. My wife doesn't know what the inside of a whorehouse smells like."

Getting my dad some strong aftershave and a cigarette lighter for Christmas.

Can't wait to see his face light up.

Aftershave joke, Getting my dad some strong aftershave and a cigarette lighter for Christmas.

Aftershave's aftereffects.

A Navy Chief and an Admiral were sitting in the barbershop. They were both just getting finished with their shaves, when the barbers reached for some after-shave to slap on their faces.

The admiral shouted, "Hey, don't put that stuff on me! My wife will think I've been in a whorehouse!"

The chief turned to his barber and said, "Go ahead and put it on. My wife doesn't know what the inside of a whorehouse smells like.

Biden and Trump are at the same barber shop

Biden and Trump are at the same barber shop. As they sat there, each one being worked on by a different barber, not one word was spoken. When the barbers finished shaving, the barber that had Trump reached for the aftershave. Trump quickly stopped him saying: No thanks, Melania will smell that and think I've been in a brothel. The second barber turned to Biden and said, How about you, Mr. Biden? Joe replied, Go ahead, Jill doesn't know what the inside of a brothel smells like.


Eminem needs to release an aftershave and shower gel gift set for Christmas

Eminessence and Marshal Lathers.

Apparently there's a battle for the rights to Star Wars aftershave.

It's The Cologne Wars.

Aftershave joke, Apparently there's a battle for the rights to Star Wars aftershave.

Shopping back then

My pop was telling me about how back in the fifties you could get so much more from the shops.

Het tells me "we used to be able to go into grace brothers with ten dollars and come out with two pairs of socks, some new undies, a razor or two and a small bottle of aftershave."

But unfortunately as he tells me, "you can't get that much for ten dollars anymore...there's too many security cameras"

Yul Brynner was a lifelong Liverpool fan who didn't wear aftershave

Yul never wore cologne

I've got a new aftershave called breadcrumbs

The birds love it

If we used the same logic behind Aftershave...

We would call soap 'Aftershit'.

You can explore aftershave aspirin reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean aftershave gasoline dad jokes. There are also aftershave puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Have you heard about the new aftershave that drives women crazy?

No! Tell me about it.
It smells of $50 dollar bills

Got my self some new aftershave for the weekend, it's called Breadcrumbs

The birds love it.

have you smelled my new seeded aftershave?

The birds love it.

I sprayed some Axe Wilder having splashed on a dash of aftershave Pryor.

People say I've got great scents of humor.

What do you cal two identical bottles of aftershave?

CL-ones

Aftershave joke, What do you cal two identical bottles of aftershave?

I once went to a country where the president was a bottle of aftershave

It was under cologne-ial rule...

What's that smell?

Girl: Eugh it smells like bleach in here
Guy: Sorry love it must be my aftershave, it's eau de toilette

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the aftershave shampoo jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working aftershave douse piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes