Afte Jokes
17 afte jokes and hilarious afte puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about afte that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Afte Short Jokes
Short afte jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The afte humour may include short aftershave jokes also.
- Did you know that the two girls from Requiem for a Dream got boats and ended up getting into an accident with each other? The collision was aft to aft.
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Afte One Liners
Which afte one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with afte? I can suggest the ones about barbershop and midnight.
- What happens to a sailor who stands too far aft? He gets a stern warning.
- Three is fore for four. And aft to two too.
Cheeky Afte Jokes to Experience Good Cheer & Frivolity
What funny jokes about afte you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean afternoon jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make afte pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Aftershave's aftereffects.
A Navy Chief and an Admiral were sitting in the barbershop. They were both just getting finished with their shaves, when the barbers reached for some after-shave to slap on their faces.
The admiral shouted, "Hey, don't put that stuff on me! My wife will think I've been in a w**...!"
The chief turned to his barber and said, "Go ahead and put it on. My wife doesn't know what the inside of a w**... smells like.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Afterlife for IRS Cheaters
Tony and his friend John die in a car accident and go to judgment. God tells Tony that because he cheated on his income taxes, the only way he can enter Heaven is to sleep with a s**..., ugly woman for the next five years.
A few days later, as Tony's walking in the park with his s**..., hideous new girlfriend, he spots his friend John with an absolutely drop dead gorgeous woman. "John, what happened?" Tony asks.
"I have no idea," John replies. "I was told I have five years of amazing s**... to look forward to. The only thing I don't understand is why she always yells 'Damn income taxes!' whenever we have s**...."
A buddist monk recently became a street vendor
A passerby bought a $1 item from him and gave him a 50 dollar note.
The monk took the note and just sat down afte thanking him.
The guy got slightly angry when there was no change given and the monk answered
"change comes from within"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
This afternoon I just relaxed on the couch and m**....
The psychiatrist took a lot of notes.
I went to an Aftermarket Car Show.
Spoiler Alert!
In the afterlife, what do people celebrate?
Their Urniversary.
3 Men's Afterlives
Three men get into a horrible car accident, and all three die together. As they are waiting in limbo, they start talking about the Afterlife. As it turns out, one man is Muslim, one man is Buddhist, the last is Christian.
The Muslim says, "I'm going to enjoy my 40 virgins until my wife shows up!"
The Buddhist says, "Reincarnation is going to be a blast.. until I find my wife again."
The Christian man starts laughing, and the others seem puzzled.
"My wife's an athiest."
My name is Afterhim because my father was a big fan of Rocky Balboa
So he decided to name me after him
I've got a new aftershave called breadcrumbs
The birds love it
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
After-s**...-Selfies will never work for me,...
...because with that hand I'd already have to hold the smartphone.
what aftershave does James bond uses after retirement?
Old Spyce.
I want to go to the afterlife to ask Robin Williams, "How's it hanging?"
I'm not sorry.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Afternoon s**... when you have kids......
Afternoon s**...
Love what kids come up with...they know so much they are not
given credit for.
The only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon "q**... with
their 8-year-old son in the apartment was to send him out on
the balcony with a Popsicle and tell him to report on all
the neighborhood activities...
- "There's a car being towed from the parking lot," he
shouted.
He began his commentary as his parents put their plan into
operation:
- "An ambulance just drove by!"
- "Looks like the Anderson s have company," he called out.
- "Matt's riding a new bike!"
- "Looks like the Sanders are moving!"
- "Jason is on his skate board!"
After a few moments he announced...
- "The Coopers are having s**...."
Startled, his mother and dad shot up in bed.
Dad cautiously called out..."How do you know they're
having s**...?"
Jimmy Cooper is standing on his balcony with a
Popsicle."
One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two pathetic-looking men by the side of the road, eating grass.
He ordered his driver to stop and got out to investigate. He asked the men, "Why are you eating grass?"
"We don't have no money for food," the first man replied.
"Then you must come with me to my house," insisted the lawyer.
"But, sir, I got a wife and three kids here," said the man.
"Bring them along!" replied the lawyer.
The second man exclaimed, "I got a wife and six kids!"
"Bring them as well!", the lawyer proclaimed as he headed back to his limo.
They all climbed into the car, and once underway, one of the men expresses, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."
The lawyer replied, "I'm most happy to do it. You'll love my place. The grass is almost a foot tall."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An afternoon q**...
Mr. and Mrs. Johnson knew that the only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon "q**..." with their 8-year old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony with a Popsicle and tell him to report on all the neighborhood activities. As his parents put their plan into operation, he began his commentary:
"There's a car being towed from the parking lot," he shouted.
"An ambulance just drove by!"
"Looks like the Andersons have company," he called out.
"Matt Brown is riding a new bike!"
"Looks like the Sanders are moving!"
"Jason Smith is on his skate board!"
"Mr. and Mrs. Cooper are having noontime s**...!!"
Startled, his mother and dad shot up in bed. Dad cautiously called out, "How do you know they're having s**...?"
"Because Jimmy Cooper is standing on his balcony eating a Popsicle."
