African American Jokes

99 african american jokes and hilarious african american puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about african american that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest African American Short Jokes

Short african american jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The african american humour may include short african kid jokes also.

  1. I just read in the news that tons of Americans are sending their old clothes to poor people in Africa. Seems like a waste of time in my opinion. I've never seen an African with a 52 inch waist.
  2. Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump? Because orange is the new black.
  3. An African American woman has 5 son's, Tyrone, Tyrone, Tyrone, Tyrone, and Tyrone. How do you tell them apart? By their last names.
  4. I failed my biology test today. The question was: "What is commonly found in cells?"
    Apparently, "African Americans" wasn't the correct answer.
  5. Why do African Americans always have nightmares? Because the last one to have a dream got shot
  6. Kudos to Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie! They really went out of their way to make their adoptive African children feel like a part of an authentic American family by getting a divorce.
  7. The only way to know if a jokes is actually funny is to tell it to an African-American. Black laughs matter.
  8. My African-American friend hooked up with a girl from Thailand... It was a real black-Thai affair.
  9. I was arrested for punching an elderly African-American lady at home depot. My wife told me to find a Black N' Decker.
  10. My friend showed me a black computer he wanted to buy... I said "Dont you mean an African American computer?" and he replied "Stop being so PC"

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African American One Liners

Which african american one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with african american? I can suggest the ones about brown people and european american.

  1. What do you call five African-Americans born together? Triplets.
  2. How do you offend an African-American and Chinese person? Make a joke about brack people.
  3. Why does Stephen Hawking date African Americans? Because he loves to study black holes.
  4. What do you call an African American with asthma? The Black Panter
  5. What do you call an african american in a 3 piece suit? The defendant.
  6. If my African American father had an Asian name It would be So Long
  7. For the last time, I'm not racist! I specifically called it African American Friday!
  8. What's a Black Adder? An African American Accountant.
  9. This might be a bit rascist: What do you call an African American Houdini? Black Magic
  10. African American Letters. They are all blackmail.
  11. Why do some African-Americans have afros? Because it's in their hairitage
  12. "Betty White" What the African American said when he heard there was a new Pope.
  13. What's the number one killer of African-Americans? I don't know, just axe them.
  14. What do you call an African American who is good on piano? Blackmaninoff
  15. How to be politically correct on black Friday? Call it African American Friday instead

Heartwarming African American Jokes that Make You Laugh

What funny jokes about african american you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean south african jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make african american pranks.

An international school teacher asks a question: "What's your own opinion on food scarcity in other countries?"

**An African student:** What's food?
**A European student:** What's scarcity?
**An American student:** What are 'other countries'?
**A Chinese student:** What's 'my own opinion'?

So a teacher asks his class the question...

"What's your opinion on donating food to foreign countries?" The African student says, "What's food?" The Indian student says, "What's donating?" The American student says, " What's foreign countries?" And the Chinese student says, "What's my opinion?"

They walk in the bar

A bartender is working at an upscale bar downtown when all of the sudden, an Englishman, a Dane, a Frenchman, a German, a Russian, an American, a Canadian, a Mexican, a Peruvian, a Brazilian, a Colombian, a Chinese, a Japanese, a Korean, 29 different Africans from all different African countries, and an Indian all walk in to the bar.
And the bartender says to them, sorry gentlemen, but you can't come here without a Thai.
^thanks ^SnW

Four kids walk into an interview...

Four kids walk into an interview. One is American, one is British, one is African, and one is Chinese. The interviewer asks them all the same question: "In your own opinion, what do you think of the scarcity of food in other countries?" The British kid asks "What is scarcity?" The American kid asks "What are other countries?" The African kid asks "What is food?" And the Chinese kid asks "What is my own opinion?"

It's not PC to give your wife a black eye

You should really be giving her an african american eye

A teacher at an international school...

asks her class what their opinion is on giving food to people in other countries.
The Jewish kid asks "What is giving?"
The African kid asks "What is food?"
The Chinese kid asks "What is my opinion?"
And the American kid asks "What are other countries?"

In light of mlk day...

African american culture has fought so hard not to have to sit at the back of the bus.
But they still do anyway.

An International School Teacher

...starts a lesson with her 4 students, who are an American kid, an African kid, a European kid and a Chinese kid. She asks "what's your opinion on food scarcity in other countries?"
first, the African kid asks "what's food?"
the European kid asks "what's scarcity?"
the American kid asks "what's other countries?"
and finally the Chinese kid asks "what's my own opinion?"

I just finished reading a scholarly book that exploring the African American experience in samurai culture I highly recommend it.

It's called, "Ninja, Please"

An African-American lady called Betty came into my restaurant.

She proceeded to look at the menu for about half an hour before asking "Is there any chicken on the menu?"
Exasperated I replied "No black Betty, it's ham or lamb."

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman... (long joke)

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a Hawaiian and an Alaskan), an Argentinean, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovak, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, an Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uruguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, an Iranian, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Syrian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, an Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a v**... Islander, a Georgian, a Bahaman, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Canadian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Ghanaian, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian, 2 Africans and you...
walk into a fine restaurant.
"I'm sorry," says the maître d', after scrutinizing the group, "but you can't come in here without a Thai."

The Kindergartener's Question

Johnny walked up to his kindergarten teacher with an inquisitive look in his eyes. "Do you know where the black—" Johnny asked, to the teacher's retort. "Johnny! Say African-American!"
"Do you know where the African-American construction paper is?"

The teacher in science class asks Little Johnny...

"Why do African American people have yellow eyes?"
Johnny , a little confused , waits for a moment , before replying back, "OH , i know! it's from all the pepper spray!"

An African, a Mexican, and an American...

An african, a mexican, and an american are standing on the edge of a volcano. The african throws a bag of sand in and says: "We have too much of this in my country". the Mexican throws in a burrito and says: "We have too many on these in my country". The American throws the mexican in and says: "we have too many of these..."

The U.N. initiates a poll...

The United Nations initiated a poll with the request, "Please tell us your honest opinion about the lack of food in the rest of the world."
The poll was a total failure.
The Russians did not understand "Please". The Italians did not know the word "honest". The Chinese did not know what an "opinion" was. The Europeans did not know "lack", while the Africans did not know "food". Finally, the Americans didn't know anything about the "rest of the world".

A New York Times reporter is interviewing some people

The first question asked is "What is your honest opinion about the shortage of meat in the world?"
The interview was a huge failure...
The African asks "What does meat mean?".
The American asks "What does shortage mean?".
The Chinese person asks "What does opinion mean?".
The Russian asks "What does honest mean?"
The North Korean just waits. The reporter asks again, and is told "The Interview is no good!"

How do you know Mexicans and African Americans are similar??

Once you know Juan you know Jamal

Why are so many African Americans moving to Detroit?

Because they hear there are no jobs there.

A man walks into a gun shop.

He looks over the guns until the cashier asks what he wants. The man couldn't decide so the cashier asked, "what are you shooting?" The man said "cans". The cashier asked, "what kind of cans?" The man took a pause, than finally said "oh you know, Americans, Mexicans, Africans."

Apparently it's no longer politically correct to direct a joke at any racial or ethic minority, so...

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Gurkha, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, two Kiwis, a German, an American, a South African, a Cypriot, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, a Dane, a Romani, a Bulgarian, a Swiss, a Greek, a Bulgarian, a Singaporean, a Norwegian, a Libyan, a Hindu, a Muslim, a Monk, an Italian, a Serb, a Russian and an Ethiopian went to a bar.
The bouncer said, "I'm sorry, you can't come in here without a Thai"

Massive US Blizzard advancing North

African American community complains about exclusion of black snowflakes.

Donald Trump has received 50% of the African American Republican vote so far....

and the other one has voted for Ben Carson.

Why was I arrested for only 1 year with a $5,000 fine after killing an unarmed African-American man?

On charges of "impersonating a police officer".

Donald Trump has a new slogan that he hopes will help his numbers with African American voters.

"Orange Is The New Black."

A group of kids start singing "Baa Baa Black Sheep"

Then a social justice warrior barges in and says "it should be "Baa Baa African American Sheep"

I took my African American spouse to the urologist...

He told me how to fix my black wive's bladder.

The m**... Legalization PAC recently released a report detailing the African American demographic in the Tea Party

It was an example of the p**... calling the kettle black.

Why could nobody win a dance off at the annual African American ball?

Because it was a black tie event

What do you mean you can't sell African Americans anymore?

Haven't you seen the black market?

3 guys walk into a bar...

One of them is Mexican, another African and an American. The American looks at the other two and says "is this some kind of joke?"

Why do african kids get off school earlier than american kids?

they dont need a lunch break

There was an Arabian, African, European, and an American sitting together at a table...

A guy comes up to them and asks: What is your opinion on lack of food for the poor in the rest of the world?
The Arabian says: What is an opinion?
The African says: What is food?
The European says: What is poor?
The American says: What is the rest of the world?

The NAACP was thinking of changing their name to the National Association for the Advancement of African Americans

Then they decided naaaa

Due to the negative connotation of the phrase "colored people" the NAACP is thinking about changing their name to reflect more modern terms like "African Americans"

But then they said NAAAA.

It will not be long before a social warrior starts claiming

that physics is offensive. Like why is it called black hole? why not African American holes.

I can't believe Prince Harry, who's British royalty, is marrying African American actress Meghan Markle. Why would someone that rich and famous marry an obviously inferior genetic specimen? It's just unthinkable.

Though I suppose if Meghan wants to marry a ginger, it's none of my business.

Cops are now beating up African-Americans who stay awake too long…

They say that they won't tolerate b**... who are resisting a rest…

African Americans are such good runners because they're always outrunning the CCC

Cops, cheetahs and children

What do you call a four-legged, three-eyed, mute, deaf, transgender, African-American, handicapped, e**..., cancer-riddled, rich, thrice-divorced, tired, fashionable, pansexual, elderly factory worker?

I don't know.

What do you call the single African American in a group of p**... smokers?

The toking black guy.

Today, the United States began to silence an influential African American icon

Never again will we hear the words of More gain, Free man

I got arrested after I asked the blacksmith for an assortment of m**... tools.

They say I'm racist and should say African-American smith instead.

I lost my job at the laundry mat the other day

Apparently our policy of seperating the w**... from the colors dosent mean telling the african americans and the pakistanis to get out

An African American guy in College ...

Asks a white dude:
- Hey man where's the color printer?
Dude replies:
- Man, it's 2018, you can use any printer you want!

My Dad's step brother Tom is African American

I'm not sure what to call him without offending him

What's the difference between an American lift and an African lift?

The American is 2000 pounds or 10 ppl and the African is 10 pounds or 2000 ppl

Wanna know the difference between Bo Dietl and Bo Bice?

About three hundred pounds and a pile of African American bodies.

an african politician visits an american politician.

Af: That's a big house you've got there, how did you afford it?
Am: See that bridge over there? I kept 10% of the money that went into building it, same goes for most of the roads and bridges that were rebuilt here.
Ten years later, the American goes to visit his old friend.
Am: That's an enormous mansion you've got there, how did you afford it?
Af: See that bridge over there?
Am: No.
Af: That's how.

What do you call a person who exclusively resurrects African American corpses?

A negromancer.

I read in the news that Americans are sending old clothes to poor African countries ,thats useless

Cause no one in Africa has a 52 waist!

I hate how we have to be politically correct at the office. My boss said we shouldn't use the term "black" because it's not very professional.

So during coffee break, I asked him: *"How African-American do you like your coffee?"*

"Gone with the Wind" was responsible for the first African American women recieving an Oscar

Because it's very hard it is to act like slavery was kinda cool.

A Canadian, a Swiss, a German, a Mexican, a American, a Korean, a Austrian, a Brazilian, a Estonian, a Filipino, a British, a Egyptian, a Icelander, a Jamaican, a South African, a Puerto Rican, a Chinese, a Latvian, a Moroccan, a Taiwanese, a Spaniard, and a romanian walk into a fancy restaurant.

The waiter stops them and says Sorry, you can't come in here without a Thai.

An international school teacher asks: What's your own honest opinion on food scarcity in other countries?

An African student responds: What's food?
A Western European student: What's scarcity?
An Eastern European student: What's honest?
A Chinese student: What's opinion?
A Russian student: What's your?
An American student: What's other countries?

An Englishman, an African and an American decide they want to jump off of a building.

They climb up one. The Englishman looks down and says: "It's too high, I won't jump.", the African says: "Vool, vool, not jump.". The American jumps without thinking, nearly kills himself and yells: "My a**... wool, concrete!"
(I tried to translate this from Czech as best as I could)

My friend tries hard to be politically correct

Talk about the p**... calling the kettle African American

Just after WWII begins the commander of one of African garrisons recieves a telegram:

''The war is declared, immidiately find and arrest all enemies in your area.''
After some time he sends a performance report:
''The order was executed. 4 Germans, 2 French, 1 Belgian, 3 Americans were arrested. Please, immidiately report who are we at war with.''

What would Tigger's name be if he were African American?

Still Tigger. Race doesn't change your name, you racist.

a joke we tell in Ukraine

A russian, a Ukrainian and an African American guys are sitting in the waiting room while their wives give birth.
The nurse comes out with 3 babies and says "sorry guys, they've got mixed up..let's see whose is whose".
The Ukrainian takes a black kid and runs.
They yell "hold on dude!!! That kid is obviously not yours!"
the Ukrainian replied "I don't care I dont want a russian!!!"

jokes about african american