Afraid Of Heights Jokes

26 afraid of heights jokes and hilarious afraid of heights puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about afraid of heights that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Afraid Of Heights Short Jokes

Short afraid of heights jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The afraid of heights humour may include short fear of flying jokes also.

  1. I wasn't afraid of heights until my significant other told me about her bungee jumping accident I got the fright of my wife.
  2. My friend is afraid of heights... I'm more afraid of snakes, but my fear of heights is definitely up there.
  3. I'm not afraid of heights. I'm not even afraid of falling from heights. I'm afraid hitting the ground after falling from heights.
  4. I was walking my dog around my building ...on the ledge.
    Some people are afraid of heights. I'm afraid of widths.
  5. What do you call an Ape that's afraid of heights? A chimp-p**....
    This is my go to primatology joke.

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Afraid Of Heights One Liners

Which afraid of heights one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with afraid of heights? I can suggest the ones about afraid and scared of flying.

  1. What do you call a bird that's afraid of heights? A chicken
  2. A lot of people are afraid of heights Not me, I'm afraid of widths
  3. Anyone afraid of heights? ...are you afraid of widths, too?
  4. How do you score with a girl who is afraid of heights? You valley date her.
  5. I'm not afraid of heights I'm afraid of widths
    Credit- Stephen Wright
  6. I used to be afraid of heights until I started rock climbing... Now I feel boulder.
  7. Why did the the acrophobe pothead start screaming? She's afraid of heights.
  8. I am afraid of heights That's why I never get high!

Afraid Of Heights Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about afraid of heights you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean claustrophobic jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make afraid of heights pranks.

p**... Englishman, p**... Scotchman and p**... Irishman come across a magic slide. The slide operator tells them when they slide down, whatever they shout out for is what they will land in at the bottom. p**... Englishman goes first and yells "Gold!" and lands in gold. p**... Scotsman goes next and screams "Silver!" so he lands in silver. p**... Irishman looks down the slide and, being afraid of heights, closes his eyes and jumps, crying out "OH SH*T!"

I was talking to a girl at school one day and she was talking to me and she asked how tall I was and I answered 6'4 and she shivered and then I said Maybe 6'5 and she screamed. Then I asked her What's wrong with you?

She said Nothing, I'm just afraid of heights.

A theater owner has a smudge on his sign

He climbs the ladder to clean it, but he is afraid of heights and soils himself, causing his underwear to stick to him uncomfortably. He now has two problems:
Marquee mark and the funky bunch
I'm so sorry

p**... is standing at the edge of Ireland praying

p**... is standing at the edge of Ireland praying,
"Dear lord, I wish to see my mother and father in America, but I cannot fly because I'm scared of heights, and I cannot sail because I'm afraid of drowning"
And God answers him, "p**..., if you cannot sail and you cannot fly, what would you like me to do?". p**... replies, "You could build a bridge reaching all the way across the Atlantic ocean to New York", and God says "p**... this is something I cannot do, the Atlantic ocean is far too large and deep for any bridge to be built".
p**... thinks for a second and says "Well, could you give me the ability to understand a woman's brain?", and God replies "Do you want lights on that bridge?"

A guy finds a lamp walking through the desert...

When he rubs the lamp a genie comes out and tells the man he has one wish and whatever he wants it will be done! The guy says to the genie that he is afraid of height and wants a bridge built from California to Hawaii. The genie replies that it would take all of his powers to build that bridge, and is willing to make any other wish come true instead. The man says, I wish to know how to understand women! The genie says, so do you want 2 or 4 lanes on that bridge to Hawaii?