Following is our collection of Afghanistan jokes which are very funny. There are some afghanistan outpost jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these afghanistan kaboom puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Duck
A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was trudging through the Afghanistan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried towards it, only to find a little old Jewish man at a small stand selling ties.
The Taliban asked, "Do you have water"
The Jewish man replied, "I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie? They are only $5"
The Taliban shouted, "Infidel! I do not need an over-priced tie! I need water! I should kill you, but I must find water first!"
"OK, OK" said the old Jewish man, "It does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie and that you hate me. I will show you that I am bigger than that. If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a lovely restaurant. It has all the ice cold water you need. Shalom."
Muttering, the Taliban staggered away over the hill. Several hours later he staggered back, almost dead, and said "Your f***ing brother won't let me in without a tie!"
A British Engineer just started his own business in Afghanistan. He's making land mines that look like prayer mats. It's doing very well. He says prophets are going through the roof.
The Sims
because of the tally ban.
David Cameron has said the UK's mission in Afghanistan is 'accomplished'.
We're leaving that country in a state of poverty and despair, where half the population can't read and daily life is blighted by the ever-present threat of needless violence.
Yes, we've brought the British way of life to them all right.
because of the tally-ban
Friend - "My Dad just bought a condo in Afghanistan, what an idiot."
Me - "Are you kidding? Those real estate prices are set to explode."
How should I know, I just fly the drones.
Got a call centre in Afghanistan, and told them I was suicidal.
They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck...
What do you call Afghan triplets?
Twins!
I am so sorry....
You can explore afghanistan terrorist reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean afghanistan taliban dad jokes. There are also afghanistan puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I told him Iran.
At the infideli counter.
I guess Iran* a little too far
*I'm pronouncing it "e-ran"
A British engineer started his own business in Afghanistan.
He's making landmines that look like prayer mats. He says that prophets are going through the roof.
First up was Mary. "My daddy served in Afghanistan. He was a paratrooper."
"A paratrooper?" Asked the teacher, who was awed.
"Yes, please look closer -- you can see his jump badge."
Second was Joe. "My granny served in Vietnam. She was a doctor."
"A doctor?" Asked the teacher, who was moved.
"Yeah, see? That's a stethoscope hanging around her neck."
Third was little Johnny, "This is my great grandpa. He was an electrician."
"An electrician?" Asked the teacher, who was perplexed.
"Yeah, here. You can see the two lightning bolts on his helmet"
Because there are already too many targets.
(cr
Iran (He ran).
Thought of this when looking at the world map, sorry that it's terrible.
You get Talibanned
probably because of the Tele-ban...^Taliban, ^get ^it?
You could almost say it was a surgical strike.
making land mines that look like prayer mats. He's doing very well, business is booming and Prophets are going through the roof.
Because of the towel ban
Thank you for the applause! Not enough people appreciate sex tourists.
In Afghanistan it's a question.
Bombs
Prophets are going through the roof.
US Drone
He was an Afghani-Stan.
Iran.
Barbara Walters did a story on gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict.
She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands.
She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walked behind their husbands, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime and women seemed happy to maintain the old custom.
Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, "Why do you still abide by an old custom, that you once tried so desperately to change?"
The woman looked Ms. Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said, "Land mines."
In Afghanistan. It was on the news.
He never pulled out
Because of the Taliban
(say it out loud)
Because of the tele-ban.
Because of the tally ban!
...to shoot at them from a helicopter.
Expected petroleum.
Galaxy Note 8 batteries will NOT be manufactured in Afghanistan.
Although I guess he did order it from the White house with his Little Boy hands.
It quickly became the number 1 hit in Afghanistan
These quadricopters are going to be named "Strikekirts", which reads the same forwards and backwards.
Why?
It's because they are Palindrones.
Iran.
Because of the tally-ban.
There's a Taliban
Because they are all Target's!
Because of the Tally Ban.
I have no clue, I just fly the drone.
A man in the bar strikes up a conversation with the soldier.
"So sorry if I'm being rude, but how'd you lose your leg?"
"Explosion in the war. I miss my friends too much here and I want to go back. They won't let me with my injuries though."
"They still stationed in Afghanistan?"
"No, they're dead"
"My condolences. Have a beer on me."
"That's very kind of you sir but I'm not old enough to drink"
for the 4th time"
"My brother died in Afghanistan."
"Oh that's so sad, I'm sorry for your loss! How did he die?"
"He blew himself up in a crowded market."
Because of the tally ban
A marine was deployed to Afghanistan. While he was there, he received a letter from his girlfriend. In the letter she explained that she had slept with two guys while he had been gone and she wanted to break up with him. She also wanted the pictures of herself back.
So, the marine did what any other man would do. He went around to his buddies and collected all the unwanted photos of women he could find. He then mailed about 24 pictures of women (with clothes and some without) to his ex-girlfriend with the following note:
"I don't remember which one you are. Please remove your picture and send the rest back."
Because of the Teleban.
The sleeping was intense
Visiting Afghanistan for a second time, a war correspondent from CNN noted that since the fall of the Taliban, wives who used to walk ten paces behind their husbands were now walking ten paces in front.
The journalist asked one of the men if this was a sign of growing equality.
"No", the man replied. "Land-mines."
America already bombed the schools.
Because in Afghanistan they have Tallyban
Turns out he wanted to be Sheikh'en, not Sirred.
Kabum!
What were they thinking sending special forces into Afghanistan?
Because people in Afghanistan get stoned to death.
At first, they were just wrappers made of goat skin.
Then the Americans came along and improved them. By taking it out of the goat.
An aide comes into the Oval Office and says to Trump:
"Sir, three Brazilian solders were killed in Afghanistan last night."
Trump looks absolutely devastated, nobody's ever seen him like this.
He sinks back in his chair, saying oh my god over and over.
Then he composes himself and says:
Okay. Just remind me, how many are there in a brazillion?"
Because of the tally ban
A terrorist.
Because of the telly ban
Targets.
I'll let myself out.
She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walked behind their husbands, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime and women seemed happy to maintain the old custom.
Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, "Why do you still abide by an old custom, that you once tried so desperately to change?"
The woman looked Ms. Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said, "Land mines."
Land mines.
Seven's been worried about six even since he left Afghanistan. Every time 6 closes his eyes, he sees the war and hears the gunshots. He sees the blood, the killing, the death, and soldiers falling. When he looks at seven, he remembers when they were forced to eat their own flesh to not starve in those caves. He sees the war and the flashbacks will come back forever, burned into his soul and mind.
But i said no, because, from what i heard, people in afghanistan get stoned TO DEATH
[not mine]
Too many Targets
But the moment i checked the map I ran.
Off in the distance I saw what I thought was a mirage but as I got closer I could see it's wasn't a mirage, Israel.
It was two men arguing, so I tried to calm the situation down but they turned against me. The one man threw Iraq, so Iran all the way home.
Agitated by the encounter I told my wife I wanted to get revenge for the assualt, but she calmed me down and assured me it Kuwait.
Iran
And Iran, I ran so far away!
Because of the tally-ban.
...to Washington D.C. in order to bring peace, democracy and the rule of law to the troubled nation of United States of America.
on a mission to secure the fragile democracy.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the afghanistan detonate jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working afghanistan iraqi piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.