Advertised Jokes
38 advertised jokes and hilarious advertised puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about advertised that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Advertised Short Jokes
Short advertised jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The advertised humour may include short promoted jokes also.
- Elon Musk has come up with a fool proof plan of destroying Apple because they refuse to advertise on Twitter. He plan to buy it.
- I don't know why Marvel hasn't tried to put advertisements on the Hulk He's essentially a giant banner
- Personally, i think that Tide pods are even better than advertised. I mean, anything that can clean your clothes and the gene pool in the same product...
- A man placed an advertisement, "Wife wanted". The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: You can have mine
- I don't understand why Marvel hasn't put any advertisements on the Hulk The guy is essentially a giant banner.
- How do you advertise a boxing match between a Hispanic construction worker, and a Catholic priest. Alien vs predator
- My brother asked if i could help him come up with a way to advertise the new vacation resort he was opening up. I said "Brochure."
- Your mom and a Volkswagon have something in common They're both 40 times dirtier than advertised.
- Apple is advertising the new iPhone as "The most powerful four inches ever." I can't believe they stole my slogan.
- My new toothpaste is false advertising It said, "Guaranteed whiteness in 14 days."
Well, it's been 15 days and I'm still Asian.
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Advertised One Liners
Which advertised one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with advertised? I can suggest the ones about advertisement and advertising.
- Why don't they put advertisements on the Hulk? He's basically a huge banner.
- I recently saw an advertisement for a double entendre contest So I entered my friend
- Why doesn't Marvel advertise on Hulk? He is basically a giant banner.
- How do you advertise a French rifle? Never fired, dropped once.
- Marvel should use The Hulk to advertise movies. I mean basically he's just a big Banner.
- What's the most attention grabbing way to advertise a political candidate? Poll dancing
- Marvel should use the Hulk in more of its advertising. He's literally a giant Banner.
- If Whole Foods sells sliced apples, Is it false advertising?
- Why is the Hulk good at advertising? He's a huge Banner.
- Why isn't there a lot of advertising aimed at philosophers? It's a Nietzsche market
- What do you call a cow with no legs? A PETA advertising model.
- I work in digital advertising. I'm a hand model.
- Job Advertisment: Small black man for mudflap. Must be flexible and willing to travel.
- What's the best part of advertising for prostitutes? The product sells itself.
- How do you advertise a motor home? A trailer
Entertaining Advertised Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone
What funny jokes about advertised you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean announced jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make advertised pranks.
Today I was offered s**... by an 18 year old female...
Now I'm not gonna lie this chick was smoking hot. In exchange for the s**... I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner for her. Of course I, being the great person that I am, declined because I have high moral standards and my willpower is very strong.....but not as nearly as strong as Ajax, the safe and affordable bathroom cleaner, now available in lemon and vanilla scents
A girl came to me today...
...and told me she will have s**... with me if I advertise some random liquid detergent. Of course I said no, after all I'm a powerful man with high standards. As powerful as the new Ajax detergent, which offers a unique freshness, activated on air contact.
I was offered s**... from a 21 year old girl today
In exchange for that I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner to my friends. Of course I declined because I am a person of high moral standing with strong will power. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner now available with lemon or vanilla.
A young accountant, straight out of uni, applies for a job...
...advertised in the Manchester Evening News. He is interviewed by the owner of a small business who has built it up from scratch. "I need someone with an accounting degree," says the man, "but mainly I'm looking for someone to do my worrying for me."
"How do you mean?" says the accountant. "I have lots of things to worry about, but I want someone else to worry about money matters."
"OK," says the accountant. "How much are you offering?"
"You can start on seventy-five thousand," says the owner.
"Seventy-five thousand pounds. How can a business like this afford to pay so much?"
"That," says the man, "is your first worry."
I was offered s**... with a 21 year old girl today.
I was offered s**... with a 21 year old girl today. In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner. Of course I declined, because I am a person with high moral standards and strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available with scented lemon or vanilla.
I was offered s**... with a 21 year old girl today…
In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner. Of course I declined, because I am a man with high moral standards and strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available in lemon and vanilla scents!
I'm not panicking yet about ISPs selling my browser history to advertising companies...
On the other hand, when they offer to sell my browsing history to my wife, that would be the appropriate time to panic!
Jewish ad campaign
Old man Moskowitz was getting along in years. He decided to retire and let his 3 sons run the company (which manufactured a wide variety of nails). The sons thought they could increase market-share with some judicious billboard advertising.
Only a week later the old man was taking his usual Sunday drive in the country when he saw the first billboard ad. There it was - a picture of Christ on the Cross, with the caption: "Nails for Every Purpose. Use Moskowitz Nails."
The old man immediately met with his 3 sons to voice his concern. He explained that the backlash could be horrendous. The company could be ruined. The sons agreed to discontinue that ad.
A week later the old man was again taking his usual Sunday drive when he saw the second billboard ad. There it was - - a picture of the same cross, empty, with Christ crumpled on the ground below... and the caption: "Next Time Use Moskowitz Nails."
Mercedes for Sale @ $1
Someone put up this advertisement.
No one believed it, but one old man responded and went to see the car.
The Lady actually sold him a Mercedes, which had done just 12,000 kms, for $1.
She handed him the papers and the Car keys. Deal done.
As the old man was leaving, he said "I would die of suspense if you don't tell me why this car was sold so cheap?"
The Lady replied "I am just fulfilling the will of my deceased husband, where all money receievd from sale of his Mercedes would go to his Secretary".
An Irish Lumberjack
A large Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a good Lumberjack. The very next day, a skinny Irishman showed up at the camp with his axe, and knocked on the Foreman's door.
The Foreman took one look at the small Irishman and told him to leave. "Just give me a chance to show you what I can do," said the Irishman.
"Okay, see that giant redwood over there?" said the Foreman. "Take your axe and go cut it down."
The Irishman headed for the tree, and in five minutes he was back knocking on the Foreman's door.
"I cut the tree down," said the Irishman.
"*Holy smokes!*" Said the Formean. "Where did you get the skill to chop down trees like that?"
"In the Sahara Forest," replied the Irishman.
Confused, the Forman asked "...don't you mean the Sahara Desert?"
"Is that what they call it now?"