The Best 26 Advent Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Advent jokes. There are some advent elijah jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these advent advent calender puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Advent Jokes and Puns

Adventures Of Pedo-Sherlock

How would you like your school girls today, Mr. Holmes?

-Elementary, my dear Watson.

I moved into an advent calendar today...

Its very cold, all the windows are open.

On a cold, late December day...

... the wall calendar looked across the room at the advent calendar and said:

"It looks like our days are numbered, pal".

Advent joke, On a cold, late December day...

I like my women how I like my advent calendar.

I like my women how I like my advent calendar.
Against my wall, flaps open, ready to be eaten.

Why does Ed Miliband like advent calendars?

Because it's his only chance to open the door to Number 10!


Q: Did you hear about the man who stole the advent calendar?

A: He got 25 days.

I used to be an adventurer like you

But then I took crippling adult responsibilities.

Advent joke, I used to be an adventurer like you

12 days of Labour

Why does Jeremy Corbyn enjoy advent calendars?
Because it is the only time he will open the door to Number 10.

Got myself a Microsoft advent calendar

but I'm worried that once I've opened 3 or 4 windows I won't be able to open any more...

I can never finish anything

so I bought a cyanide advent calendar.

Just got home and found all the doors and windows wide open and everything gone...

What kind of sick person would do this to my Advent calendar?

You can explore advent hodor reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean advent arrival dad jokes. There are also advent puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Man's just been jailed for stealing an advent Calender

He got 24 days

I used to be an Adventurer like you...

...But then I got rereleased 7 times in 6 years.

Just came home to find all my doors had been smashed in and everything was gone...

What sort of sick person does that to someone's advent calendar?

My advent calendar only has days that end in 1,3,5,7,9.

That's odd.

It has been said that a million monkeys hitting keys at random on a typewriter keyboard for an infinite amount of time will almost surely type complete works of William Shakespeare.....

With the advent of internet, now we know that is not true!

Advent joke, It has been said that a million monkeys hitting keys at random on a typewriter keyboard for an infin

Why didn't people like the new Apple Mac themed advent calendars?

They didn't have any Windows

I gave each candle on our Advent wreath a name.

David, Aharon, Elijah and Shmuel.

Here in Germany we give our Advent candles names.

I call mine David, Aharon, Elijah and Shmuel.


An adventurous guy was driven to suicide.

But the knife was too dull.

A man stole an advent calendar

He got 25 days.

Did you hear about the guy that stole an advent calendar?

He got 25 days.

I got a Jehovah's Witness themed advent calender this year....

I didn't open any of the doors.

Adventure Time/Regular Show

If Finn is from the land of Ooo,

And Fiona is from the land of Aaa,

Would Mordecai and Rigby be from the land of WOOOOOAAAAH!!!!!

Came home to find all my doors had been smashed in and everything was gone.

What kind of sicko does that to someone's advent calendar?

What happened to the man who stole an advent calendar?

He got 25 days



(ba dum tsssss)

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the advent christmas jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working advent advent calendar piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes