Adorable Jokes

Following is our collection of valentine humor and porky one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Adorable puns for adults, dirty ethernet jokes or clean giveaway gags for kids.

There is an abundance of cute jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 40 funniest jokes on adorable. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any beautiful witze you can hear about adorable.

The Best jokes about Adorable

A dying mother talks to her son on her death bed

Mother: Before I die, I have to tell you something. You're ad- ado-
Son: I'm adopted?!
Mother: No, you're adorable
Son: *sniffs* Thanks, mom
Mother: That's why I chose you at the adoption center

Your adorable!

She texted me: Your adorable!

I replied: No. You're adorable!

Now she likes me a lot... All I did was point out her typo.

[Religion]A man sees a boy with a box of kittens

The man goes over and says "Oh what cute kittens!" The boy replies "Yes they are Christian kittens". About a week later the man sees the boy again with the same batch of kittens. Once again he walks over and says "my, those are just adorable!" The boy replies "Yes, they are atheist kittens" The man asks "wait, weren't they christian before?" The boy looks at the man and says "Yeah but they have their eyes open now.

Father:You were ado..

Daughter : I was adopted?

Father : You were adorable as a baby

Daughter : Oh.

Father : That's why we adopted you.

Wife: "How would you describe me?" Husband Says..

Wife: "How would you describe me?"

Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."

Wife: "What does that mean?"

Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."

Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"

Husband: "I'm just kidding!"


Bunny

A little girl walks into a pet shop. She asks the owner for a bunny, to which he responds "what kind of bunny would you like? A cute black one, an adorable brown one or perhaps a sweet little white one?"

The girl looks at the owner and answers: "I don't think my python really cares..."

What kind of table is good for your health?

A vegetable!

This joke was made by adorable 8-year-old niece!

It wasn't. It was made by a 27 year old. Me. It was made by me.

How many sheep?

A blonde woman is tired of people assuming she's stupid and dyes her hair red. Feeling empowered, she goes for a car ride down a country road. Soon she sees a farm with hundreds of sheep. She walks up to the owner of the farm and makes this proposal: "These sheep are adorable, if I guess how many there are, can I keep one?" The farmer agrees, surely out of all the sheep this woman can't guess the number exactly. She looks around and replies "There are 593 sheep" The farmer is awe-struck, the number was exactly right. So the woman picks her sheep and is getting back in the car when the farmer runs up to her and yells "WAIT! If I can guess your natural color can I have him back?" The woman smiles and agrees, she already proved she's too smart to be called a blonde. The farmer replies "you're a blonde, now can I have my dog back?"

10-year old Little Johnny brings Suzy home from school . . .

He says, "Mom, Suzy and I want to get married."

His Mom thinks it's adorable, so she asks with fake concern, "But Johnny, where will you live?"

He says, "Well, we thought about that and my room is bigger than hers, so we'll probably live in my room."

"But Johnny, what will you do for money?" the mother asked grinning.

"Well, I get $5.00 a week allowance, and Suzy gets $3.50, and I think we can get by on that."

The mother asks slyly, "But what if you have children? How will you buy diapers?"

Little Johnny shrugs, "Well, we've been lucky so far . . ."

A woman texted me with the message, "Your adorable."

I texted back, "No. YOU'RE adorable."

Now she's falling for me. I was only correcting her grammar.

My boyfriend (of an 11 year age difference) said this to me the other day...

True story: My boyfriend and I were taking a walk and he happened to be wearing his reading glasses (which I find adorable).

Me: Ooh, you look like a sexy teacher in those glasses. I think I need to stay after school...

Him: Yes, I'll show you how many times 38 goes into 27.


A little girl walks into a pet store...

A little girl walks into a pet store and approaches the clerk. "Im looking for a wabbit" she says.

The clerk, taken aback by how adorable this girl is, asks "Aww, well would you like a white wabbit, or a brown wabbit?"

The little girl replies "I dont think my python gives a thit"

A couple of friends are catching up after years apart.

"So I hear you've recently had a baby boy!" Gushes Edna.

"We did!" Responds Amy.

"Have you decided on a name yet?"

"Funny story: with our first, Denise, my husband's brother wanted to name her. The name stuck, so when he asked again, we figured he'd pick another good one."

"That's adorable! What'd he pick!"

Amy sighed. "Denephew."

[request] Silly clean jokes for a six-year-old boy I work with

There's this boy I work with at a hospital, and he's *so* adorable and nice. Unfortunately, he's really sick right now – I want to cheer him up with some silly clean popsicle-stick-style jokes, which he enjoys greatly. Any ideas?

What do you call a male cow wearing a pink shirt, orange shorts, and a purple backpack?

Adorable
(A-dora-bull)

TIL that comparative brain scans of elephants reveal that they find humans to be "adorable".

I mean, your mom told me I was sexy, but I didn't realize that it was a biological reaction.

People say that using your pet name as password is very bad idea...

but my bcQr#1f!e is just so adorable!

Little Johnnys neighbour

One day little Johnny comes home from school and his mom tells him that they are going over to the neighbors house to see their new baby. However the baby has a defect, he was born with no ears. Knowing that Johnny will say something rude his mom warns him and tells him to be polite. Johnny agrees.

Later that evening they are looking at the baby.

Johnny's mom: Wow your baby is so cute.

Johnny: Yeah he is adorable

Neighbor: Thanks we are so happy to have him. A special thing about him is that he was born with perfect 20 20 vision.

Johnny: Good because if he needed glasses he'd be f*cked

My dog becomes even more adorable after five pints of beer.

He starts stumbling everywhere and rolling around.


A dumb blonde was really tired

A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to dye her hair and look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought, "Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!"
She got out and walked over to the farmer and said, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?"
The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try.
The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157."
The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car. Before she left, the farmer walked up to her and said.
"If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"

My wife got my daughter a bowl with Dora on it

It's adorable

What do you call a very strong, yet adorable dog?

A puggernaut.

We finally get a robot onto an alien planet and the first thing we do is roll over an adorable little fuzzball. Its true.

Curiosity killed the cat.

What is perfectly adorable, good as new, and has seven tiny dents in it...

Snow White's hymen.

I love my neighbor's asian food

She pays me to walk him, and he's so fluffy and adorable

I left a present for my crush today, and she had me arrested!

When her cat does it, it's adorable, but apparently it's "creepy" when I leave a dead bird on her doorstep.

Mouse and elephant are on their way to the pool.

*Told* *by* *my* *adorable* *niece.*

Elephant: Bollox! I forgot my swim trunks!

Mouse: Don't worry, I brought a spare.

Wife : how am i looking

Dad : ABCDEFGHIJK

WIFE : What do you mean?

Dad : Adorable, bomb, cute, delightful, erotic, Fab, glamorous and hot

Wife : oh my!!! Thanks ,and IJK?

DAD : I am Just Kidding.

Husband & Wife

Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"

He texted me your adorable. I said No, you're adorable.

Now he thinks I like him, when all I did was correct his grammar.

A seal in french is a Phoque so whoever came up with the word Phoque probably looked at the seal and said

It's Phoque-ing adorable

What do you call adorable coyotes?

Cuyuties!

Triangles are so adorable!

Especially when they're acute.

Can a window fly?

I dunno, is adorable to?

Cop: Sir did you see those smart cars crash?

Me: Yes I did officer

Cop: Could you describe it sir?

Me: It was adorable officer

An adorable girl asked me something

"Are you single?"

"No, I am an album"

Help With An Old Joke

Please help me figure out the punch line of the following joke:

Did you hear about the young woman who had a date with the big butter and egg man? Next morning she was telling her friends about him: Young Woman-- And is he generous! Why he bought me the most adorable mink coat! Friend (skeptically) -- And just what did you have to do for it? Young Woman -- Just shorten the sleeves, honey!

Dad, there's a monster under my bed! A kid cries.

The dad looks under, frowns, and pulls up a Kirby plush.

Son, this is an adorable orb from space.

What do you call a cow with no legs?

A hamburger.

(Told to me by a 4 year old at a school play. Too adorable not to share.)

What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby?

A trampoline doesn't look adorable in a sailor outfit

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes