Adopted Kid Jokes

39 adopted kid jokes and hilarious adopted kid puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about adopted kid that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Adopted Kid Short Jokes

Short adopted kid jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The adopted kid humour may include short adopted jokes also.

  1. "Son, I wanted to let you know you were adopted," my dad told me. "Are you kidding? Really?" I shouted.
    "Yup, get ready," he said. "They'll be picking you up in about an hour."
  2. "One mans trash is another mans treasure" is a great quote but, its not the best way to tell your kid that hes adopted.
  3. The worst part of gay couples adopting kids The adopted kids will either get twice the amount of dad jokes or get stuck in an infinite loop of go ask your mother.
  4. Don't adopt a puppy to see if you're ready for kids Adopt a homeless guy with diarrhea & a bunch of stories that don't go anywhere.
  5. I want to adopt two kids... ... with cancer, both named Jordan.
    I've always wanted a sick pair of Jordans.
  6. "One man's trash is another man's treasure," is a great philosophy But it's a lousy way to tell a kid they're adopted.
  7. Most people choose to raise their own kids... but I'm proud to say my kids were adopted. And honestly I don't miss them.
  8. I always felt proud when my mum told people that of all her kids, I was her easiest pregnancy and birth. Then I turned 21 and found out that I was adopted.
  9. One man's trash is another man's treasure Suboptimal way of letting your kids know they're adopted
  10. One mans trash... "One man's rubbish is another man's treasure" is a fantastic Idiom.
    But it's a horrible way to tell your kid that he's adopted.

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Adopted Kid One Liners

Which adopted kid one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with adopted kid? I can suggest the ones about orphan kid and adoptive parents.

  1. I think I'm going to adopt a kid.. Recycling is important, after all.
  2. What is height of Laziness?
    Adopting a child.
  3. I'd really, really love to adopt a kid some day. Abort*
    Sorry, I hate auto correct.

Adopted Kid Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about adopted kid you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean adopt me jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make adopted kid pranks.

One day little Johnny asked his teacher

So you know how most stores have 'you break it you buy it' rule?
The teacher responded "Yes why?"
Johnny said "Well do you think if you were to be looking at babies to adopt and dropped one that the orphange would make you buy it?"

A woman once wanted me to father her child no strings attached.

In other words, "I like your genes, but I don't like what you've done with them." I agreed but with one condition. She had to put it up for adoption.

"one Man's trash is other man's treasure"

Isn't the best way to tell your kid that he is adopted.
Credits- /u/theone1221


A kid was walking into the kitchen when he notices his parents sitting at the table looking upset. He asks,
"What's wrong?"
Dad: "There is something we need to tell you son."
Son: "What is it?"
Mother: " You're adopted."
Son: "Well duh I knew that, tell me something I don't know."
Mother: " I'm not a woman."

A father tells his child, "You're adopted, son."

His son says, "Really!? Are you kidding me!?"
The dad says, "Nope, get ready. They'll be here to pick you up in an hour."

A Dad tells his son he is adopted...

Dad: I wanted to let you know you were adopted.
Son: Your kidding right?
Dad: Nope, they'll be picking you up in about an hour.

"Another mans thrash is another mans treasure"

Apparently this is not a good way for saying you are adopted to your kid

My brother and his husband decided to adopt a kid

The kid said he was hungry, so my brother responded "Hi hungry, I'm dad!" to which his husband responded "Hi dad, I'm dad!". My brother then replied to him "Hi dad, I'm dad!" They've been stuck like this for two weeks.

If two black men get married and adopt a kid...

then which father will be the one to abandon them?

Stay neglectful my friends

I adopted 3 kids recently and named them after my favorite beers; Bud Light, Miller Light, and Dos Equis. I work long days and am occasionally allowed to bring one child with me to the office. When faced with the decision of which child to take with me to work I always pick Dos Equis, because I don't always watch my kids but when I do I prefer Dos Equis.

My wife and I recently adopted 2 children from china and I came home today to find them trying to cook my poodle.

Immediately I repeated what I said this morning.
"No kids! I said WALK the dog!"

People say that adopted kids aren't loved the same as biological kids.

You'd have to be pretty drunk to accidentally spend $40,000 at an adoption agency.

How do you tell your kid they are adopted?

By starting with the question… Do you know why I never fully accepted you?

I adopted a kid who wanted to play football.

He isn't that great, but it's ok, he's used to being a sub.

How to tell a kid he's adopted

Dad: Son, do we have any dop ted!
Son: Dad, what's a dop ted?
Dad: You are.

One mans trash is another mans treasure

A great saying. But a bad way to let your kids know they are adopted.

A trans friend of mine was recently able to adopt a kid.

Haven't really seen him around lately, though.

I am taking a stand to be progressive. I support youthinasia.

So I adopted a kid from there. Sorrymyspace bar isn't working allthetime now.

Anti Vaxx

Dating a girl with an unvaccinated kid is like adopting an old dog. You feel like you're being a good person for accepting it, then you get attached and they die when they're 12.

My parents didn't vaccinate their kids.

Fortunately, I was adopted by them and it helped me to become their sole heir.

My wife asked me: We're both out of work, rent is two months overdue and the kids are going hungry—what is our option?

# ad-option
-I said

Same s**... adoption is immoral

Either the kid gets an overdose of dad jokes or gets stuck on a "go ask your mother loop"

I saw an adopted kid on the street

I walk up to him and ask him "Are you adopted?"
He replies "Yes, I am what gave me away"
I responded "Your parents"