addicted Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious addicted puns

If I was addicted to masturbation and then I got addicted to sex...

Would it be safe to assume my addiction got out of hand?

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I'm an ass man. Addicted to ass.

It's like crack to me.

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I'm addicted to seaweed.

I must seek kelp.

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My parents used to tell me that drug dealers would offer me free drugs until i got addicted to them, then they would charge me extremly high prices for it once i got addicted.

Looking at games in the App Store, I think all those drug dealers turned to game developers.

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There's a support group for people addicted to plastic surgery...

The head of the group walks in and says, "I'm seeing a lot of new faces this week, and I have to say I'm pretty disappointed."

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I *SWEAR* I'm not addicted to brake fluid...

I can stop whenever I want

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My family insists i am addicted to drinking brake fluid.

But i can stop any time i want.

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I used to be addicted to soap....

I'm clean now.

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I'm addicted to having money in the bank.

And I really do suffer from withdrawals.

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I used to be addicted to Thanksgiving leftovers

I had to quit cold turkey

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I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey...

...but then I turned myself around.

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Ted told me i'm a dick...

I said i'm not addicted.

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I used to be addicted to Tide Pods...

But I'm clean now.

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No, I'm not addicted to taking batteries out of clocks.

I can stop at any time I want.

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I'm not addicted to drinking brake fluid....

I can stop any time I want.

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Even though my girlfriend is addicted to meth, I still love her.

She's so beautiful. Those lips, those eyes, that tooth.

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I was addicted to masturbation and then became addicted to sex...

One could say my addiction got out of hand...

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A recent study shows that 9 out of 10 people addicted to brake fluid...

...just can't stop.

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I overheard my 14 year old daughter telling this joke to a friend.

-"Every time I say something, you say the word addicted"

-"ok"

-"Drugs"

-"Addicted"

-"Alcohol"

-"Addicted"

-"What slapped you across the face last night? "

" Addicted"

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I know a guy addicted to brake fluid

He says he can stop at any time

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So I have this friend who's addicted to drinking brake fluid...

but he tells me not to worry, he can stop anytime he wants.

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I'm addicted to bestiality with wolves but I'm getting better.

I'm down to a pack a day.

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I just drank another bottle of brake fluid.

My friends think I'm addicted, but I can stop when I want to.

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I'm beginning to worry about my obsession with technology.

I told my doctor, "I think I'm addicted to Twitter."
He replied, "I don't follow you."

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Addicted

Say "addicted" after everything I say.

What is someone who takes drugs?

What is someone who drinks?

What hit you in the face last night?

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My wife says I'm addicted to auctions, but she's wrong...

I stopped after going once…going twice…

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I'm addicted to brake fluid

But it's not so bad, i can stop anytime!

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Did you hear about the guy addicted to eating salt?

Don't worry, he was cured.

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My girlfriend said I was addicted to porn

I just can't see her POV

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Doctor, doctor, I think I'm addicted to Twitter...

Sorry, I don't follow you.

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I'm addicted to placebos.

I could quit but it wouldn't matter.

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My friend used to be addicted to mud wrestling...

He's 6 months clean now.

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Twitter Addiction

A man tells his doctor, Doc, help me. I'm addicted to Twitter! The doctor replies, Sorry, I don't follow you."

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One out of 3 people is addicted to drugs.

Look at the person on your left. Now look at the person on your right. Chances are one of them has some drugs to share with you.

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I was addicted to Tide Pods

I'm clean now

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What are the most funny Addicted jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Addicted? Well, here are the best Addicted dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Addicted pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes