Adamant Jokes

Following is our collection of stupidest humor and storks one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Adamant puns for adults, dirty drs jokes or clean god and adam gags for kids.

There is an abundance of commerce jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 18 funniest jokes on adamant. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any adam eve witze you can hear about adamant.

The Best jokes about Adamant

My wife says she's fed up and is planning on leaving me this weekend.

Despite begging and pleading with her, she's adamant she won't move out before then.

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and an MCSE are trying to fix a car...

The mechanical engineer proposes taking everything apart, inspecting all of the moving parts to ensure that they're running smoothly together, and then put everything back together. He is adamant that this is the best approach.

The electrical engineer strongly disagrees, and wants to check all of the wiring to make sure that it's not causing the problem.

They turn to the Microsoft engineer, who appears to be deep in thought. Finally, he says, "let's just close all the windows and open them again."

A drunk staggered down to a hotel reception

He was demanding a change of room. He was so insistent that the receptionist was forced to call the manager.
"What seems to be the problem?" asked the manager
"I want another room" said the drunk
"But I see you're in room 224. That's one of the best rooms in the hotel."
"I don't care. I want another room"
"Very well, sir. If you're absolutely adamant, we can move you from 224 to 260. But would you mind telling me what you don't like about your room?"
"Well" said the drunk, "for one thing, it's on fire"

Me and the wife went to an 80's themed fancy dress party last week. She didn't want me to go as a pop star...

...but i was adamant

I just met a guy addicted to brake fluid.

However, he was adamant that he could stop anytime.


Captain's log...

The first mate on a ship got drunk one day, and the captain entered it into the log: "The first mate was drunk today."

The first mate begged the captain to remove the entry, but the captain was adamant that once an entry was in the book it could never be removed.

The next day it was the first mate's turn to make the log entry, and in it he wrote: "The captain was sober today."

I don't know why the right is so in favor of confederate statues.

I don't know why the right is so in favor of confederate statues. They're pretty adamant about losers not getting participation trophies.

A 6 legged insect came up to me and said Help, my wife, Eve, has eaten an apple and is now trapped by the devil! I asked him, are you sure?

He replied, yes, I'm Adam-ant

Abraham wandered into Sam's pawnshop and placed a leather coat on the counter.

How much will you give me for this jacket?

Sam checked it over. $20, and that's the best he replied.

But that jacket is worth $100" argued Abraham.

Sam was adamant. $20 or nothing.

Are you sure that's all it's worth? pressed Abe.

Positive

Okay, said Abe. "Here's your $20.  The jacket was hanging in your doorway and I was wondering how much it was worth.

There was this guy living in Ireland who wanted to have the operation to become Irish

He had lived in Ireland for about 10 years and loved the place and its people so he went to the doctor and said he wanted to have the operation to become Irish.

The doctor warned him saying This is very dangerous, I have to remove half your brain .

The guy was very adamant and said he wanted to do it.

Next week he goes for surgery. After 5 hours he wakes up. He can see the doctor standing over him looking very worried.

The doctor says I am really sorry, the surgery went terribly wrong, I ended up having to remove your entire brain

The guy looks at him and replies Crickey mate, no worries!


-- as an Ozzy I love telling this to my Irish mates as they get really offended halfway through

What do you say to the cashier when you're adamant about using an expired coupon?

dis counts!!


My girlfriend and I went to an 80s themed party. She didn't want me to go as a pop star but I wasn't having it...

I was adamant

I told the wife that I didn't want to go to this 80's costume party with her.

But she remained adamant.

Are you sure you're the dandy highwayman?

Yes, I'm adamant

bloke in the pub

The other night, this bloke in the pub was telling me he was a big star in the 80's with a song called "stand and deliver".
I didn't believe a word he said, but he was adamant

My doctor was adamant that I should swallow a small rock to help ease my back pain.

It was a hard pill to swallow.

No matter how early I get up to drive my girlfriend to work...

She's still adamant that she's "late"

A bloke keeps ringing me...

and singing Stand and Deliver down the line. I keep telling him he's got the wrong number, but he's adamant.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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