Adam Jokes
141 adam jokes and hilarious adam puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about adam that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article tackles the popular jargon phrase "Hey Adam!" and its different interpretations. From its allusion to the Creation of Adam painting to the DC comics character Black Adam, follow the journey of Adam and his friends, Celina, Alex, Chris, and Jared, through their funny and amusing experiences. Get ready to laugh, and delve into a world of Adam-sational humor.
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Funniest Adam Short Jokes
Short adam jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The adam humour may include short adam sandler jokes also.
- The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
- Adam gave sally 3 flowers and 1 stuffed animal. Kristen gave Sally 5 flowers and 2 stuffed animals. What does Sally have? cancer.
- It's never worth getting into an argument about creationist Adam & Eve versus evolution You're just comparing apples and origins
- If adam and eve were Chinese Then we would still be in paradise as they would eat the snake instead of the apple.
- God making Adam Angel: What do you call it?
God: A human.
Angel: What does it do?
God: It doesn't annoy me, Jeff. That's what it does. - If Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider and Dennis Dugan are in a plane and the plane crashes, who will survive? American comedy films.
- Eve gets an apple Eve: I got an Apple.
Adam: ...
Eve: ...
Adam: ...
Eve: What?
Adam: I thought we'd decided on Android.
Eve: The serpent said this was better. - My wife says she's fed up and is planning on leaving me this weekend. Despite begging and pleading with her, she's adamant she won't move out before then.
- My Father says he was in an 80's band... I don't believe him but he's ADAMANT (sorry, I made that up!)
- Adam and Eve had the perfect marriage. She didn't have to hear about his mom's cookin' and he didn't have to hear about all the other men she could have married.
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Adam One Liners
Which adam one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with adam? I can suggest the ones about black adam and adam and eve.
- Why did God create Adam before he created Eve? So no one would tell him how to make Adam.
- Why do Adam and Eve use Android? Because Eve violated the apple terms and conditions.
- What did Adam say the day before Christmas? It's Christmas, Eve.
- What is a doctor who specializes in Adam's apples called. A guyneckologist.
- Adam & Eve The first people to not read the Apple terms and conditions.
- Why were the wives of a polygamist awarded a degree in physics? For splitting an Adam.
- TIL a doctor who specializes in Adam's apples is a... guyneckologist
- I know God cares... because He gave Adam.
- What's the opposite of Adam? Subtractam
- What time of day was Adam born? Just a little before Eve
- I invented a war game called "Adam and Eve". It's a first person shooter.
- Why didn't Adam buy Eve the new iPhone? Because Apple products are really expensive.
- Who was the world's first carpenter? Eve. She made Adam's banana stand
- Who were the fastest runners ever? Adam and Eve. They were first in the human race.
- Did Adam & Eve ever had a date? No. They only had a fig!
Adam And Eve Jokes
Here is a list of funny adam and eve jokes and even better adam and eve puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- If there is Adam and Eve, or Adam and Steve. It only seems fair the Eve gets a turn with both... ...That would make it Eve 'n Steven.
- "Mom, how did humans come to exist?" "Well, you see, God created Adam and Eve..."
"But dad said we came from apes."
"He was talking about his family, I am telling you about mine." - What was the first thing Adam said to Eve? Stand back, I don't know how big this thing gets!
- What was Eve charged with after murdering Adam in the Garden? Being a first-person shooter
- Seen on a sign outside a church Adam and Eve were the first people to not read the Apple conditions
- Why were Adam and Eve so happy? They didn't have to worry about in-laws
- It's funny that condoms are ribbed for her pleasure... Because in Genesis, God ribbed Adam for Eve.
- Why was Adam and Eves marriage so successful? Because he couldn't complain about her mothers cooking.
- Why did God only use 1 of Adam's ribs to make Eve? Because if He had taken 2 of them, Adam wouldn't have needed her!
- If 24th December is Christmas Eve, 23rd December should be Christmas Adam. Because men always come first.
Adam Eve Jokes
Here is a list of funny adam eve jokes and even better adam eve puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did God create the moon and stars on the eighth day? After spending a day with Eve, Adam begged God for some space
- What did Adam say when he broke up with Eve? I'm turning over a new leaf.
- The oldest laptop can be traced back to Adam and Eve An Apple with very limited memory (1 Byte), single core and OS written in Python.
- Adam says to Eve... "I wear the plants in this relationship!"
- You could call today "Christmas Adam" Because Adam came before Eve.
- Adam, the first human, walks into a comedy club. He hears a funny joke and totally splits a rib… Now his chest hurts and he has to drive Eve home.
(An original, by yours truly.) - I was fired from my Job as a Pastor the other day when a parishioner asked me who came first, Adam or Eve? Apparently, 'Depends how good they were in bed' wasnt the right answer.
- What where Adam's first words to Eve? "Don't wash it in there, you'll make the fish smell like that!"
- What did Adam say after Eve was created? Woah man!
- When was the longest day in the Bible? The day Adam was created because there was no Eve.
God And Adam Jokes
Here is a list of funny god and adam jokes and even better god and adam puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- When the God created Adam... He realised that Adam was imperfect.
..
Then God created FRANK! - While the Lord God put Adam to sleep to remove one rib Bill Cosby put Eve to sleep to add twelve ribs
- Immediately following the creation of Eve, Adam says to God "Why'd you have too use my rib?"
"Oh, its symbolic. Now you have a pain in your side!" - How do we know that God was a Mopar man? He drove Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden in his Fury.
- Adam hates going out for a meal with God. He always steals his ribs.
- If God made a woman from taking a rib from Adam. Did that make her his side chick?
- 'God didn't create Adam and Winston', Says Tenn. Republican Does that mean Adam and Steve have broken up?!
- Adam asks God: will we go to heaven? God replies: Eve'll.
- God created Adam, Adam saw Chuck Norris, Adam created tears.
- When Adam asked Eve out for dinner she replied: "Oh I'd love to, but I haven't a thing to wear."
Adam Sandler Jokes
Here is a list of funny adam sandler jokes and even better adam sandler puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Adam Sandler's movies have really been going downhill lately In his most recent one he rubbed up against Rock's bottom.
- You either die a Chris Farley or live long enough to see yourself become an Adam Sandler.
- Can humans justify anything? Obviously not, just look at Adam Sandler's career.
- Indiana is like an Adam Sandler movie. Effortless to avoid.
- I've seen so many Adam Sandler films... it's not even funny.
- Adam Sandler's new comedy special isn't so bad. It really makes you appreciate your own lot in life to see someone fall so far.
- What is the Great Saiyaman's favorite Adam Sandler movie? You Don't Mess with the Gohan
- What's the name of that one Adam Sandler movie where he gets the girl, loses the girl, but then gets her back again?
- How do you make a good movie better add Adam Sandler
- Adam Sandler walks into a shoe shop "I'll take the sandals please"
Hey Adam Jokes
Here is a list of funny hey adam jokes and even better hey adam puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Hey Adam, "Is today the 24th or the 25th?" It's Christmas, Eve.
- "Hey Adam, can you get me some water?" "Sure I can, while I'm up and at 'em!"
Share Hilarious Adam Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about adam you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean god and adam jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make adam pranks.
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[garden of eden]
**Snake:** Pssst! want an apple?
**Eve:** No thanks, I do not sin.
**Snake:** What's the length of the opposite side of a 30° right triangle with a hypotenuse of 20?
**Eve:** 10
**Snake:** Thanksss
**Adam:** How did you calculate that?
**Eve:** Oh no.
So Adam is sitting in the Garden of Eden...
... and he says, "God, I see that all of the other animals that you have created in this truly perfect world have a companion, a partner, someone to be with, share life with, and to love. Why is it that I am alone?" God pauses for a moment, and says "You know Adam, I'll work on that. Be patient, my son, I shall return to you in a week's time."
God labors for a week as only a being of such incredible omnipotence can labor, and after much exhausting work, he returns to Adam after a week has passed and reveals to him his creation.
Adam is speechless. After much gaping, he finally finds the words to say "God, she is beautiful, she is truly your most perfect creation. I must ask though, what will this cost me, for surely this cannot be free."
God says soberly "My son. I confess, to have a being of such beauty and grace, you must give me an arm and a leg. I can accept no other payment."
Adam weighs this for a moment, and then says, "How much can I get for a rib?"
God creates Adam
God creates Adam and it was good. After some time God realizes Adam needs a companion and says to him, "Adam, I have decided to give you a companion. I will give you a woman who will love you and live to please you. She will be intelligent, witty, and above all beautiful. She will cook your meals, wash your clothes, and laugh at all of your jokes."
Adam couldn't believe his luck!
God says, "All this will cost you only and arm and a leg." To which Adam replies, "What can I get for a rib?"
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adam and eve finally figured out the whole s**... thing...
afterward, adam's kicked back, dazed.
god asks "son, where's eve?"
to which adam replies "she's down at the stream, washing up."
god groans "now i'll never get that smell outta those fish."
So Adam was lonely.
God asked Adam, "What's wrong?"
Adam replied, "I'm lonely."
So God said, "Adam, I will make you a partner. She will wash and cook and clean for you; she will listen to what you have to say and never interrupt you. She won't nag you about your actions and she will even bear your children. She will stay loyal to you and never be influenced by other men."
So Adam asked, "Well, what's his gonna cost me?"
"An arm and a leg," God replied.
Then Adam asked, "Well what can I get for a rib?"
A child and Human Origin
A child asked his father, "How were people born?"
So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on."
The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now."
The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!"
His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Adam and Eve eat the apple
of the forbidden tree, God sees this and is very angry, "Adam!" he says, "for what you have done from now on by the sweat of your brow you will eat your food...." "And you Eve...you will pay with *blood*
But you can pay me in comfortable monthly payments
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I'm sick of my mate Adam.
He walks round like he's gods gift to women.
So God creates Adam...
...and soon after he notices that Adam is lonely.
God says "Do not fear, my child. For I will create a partner to accompany you and man from this time forth. She will be known, as a woman."
God continues "She will be obedient, loyal, passionate and nurturing."
Adam hesitates..
"What is this gonna cost me?" Adam asks.
God responds "An arm and a leg."
Adam retorts "What can I get for a rib?"
An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve
An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden and try to figure out what nationality they are.
The American says, "Look at how free and independent they are, they must be Americans."
The Briton says, "What are you talking about, look at how calm and reserved they are, the are obviously British."
The North Korean says, "You two are both missing the point. They have no clothes, no shelter, they only have and apple to eat between them and yet they are being told that they live in paradise. They're clearly North Korean."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Is it any wonder men have been obsessed with s**... since biblical times?
After all, Adam was ribbed for his own pleasure
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A boy pokes a girl with a pin at church
The church priest asks the girl a question "who is our lord and savior?" *the boy stabs her with the pin* she yells "JESUS CHRIST" the priest says "good good, who created us" *the boy stabs her again* she yells "GOD ALMIGHTY" the priest says "good good, now, what did Eve say to Adam after they had their 42nd child?" *he stabs her again* the girl screams "IF YOU PUT THAT THING IN MY ONE MORE TIME IM GONNA SHOVE IT DOWN YOUR t**...!" The priest faints..
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Adam and God discus women
Adam says to God, God, why did you make women so soft? God says, "So that you will like them. Adam says, "God, why did you make women so warm and cuddly? God says, So that you will like them. "Adam says to God, But, God, why did you make them so s**...? God says, So that they will like you.
Doctor's appointment.
Janet: I have a doctor's appointment today but I really don't want to go…
Adam: Just call in sick then.
A Catholic Priest told this joke at a Wedding.
Adam woke up in the Garden of Eden. After a while of wandering around he became sad. God came to him and asked "Adam, why are you sad? I have created this amazing garden for you." Adam replies, "Why does every other being have mate and I do not?" God replies " Very well I will create for you a perfect mate. But it will cost you an arm and a leg." Adam thinks for a bit and then replies "What can I get for a rib?"
A little girl asks her father where people came from.
He explained about Adam and Eve and they were our original ancestors and they had babies and that's where we came from.
Later that day the girl asked her Mom who explained that their ancestors were monkeys and apes and humans evolved from the monkeys. "So, our relatives are monkeys?" "That's right, dear"
Now the little girl was angry and stomped into the living room to see her Dad and told him what her Mom said. "You lied to me!" the little girl shouted at him.
No I didn't honey. Your Mom was talking about her side of the family
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"I don't know what to get my wife for her birthday"
Adam was talking to his friend at a bar. He said, "I don't know what to get my wife for her birthday. She has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I'm stuck." His friend said, "I have an idea! Why don't you make up a certificate saying that she can have 60 minutes of great s**..., anyway she wants it. She'll probably be thrilled." So Adam decided to listen to his friend's advice. The next day at the bar, his friend said, "Well? Did you take my suggestion?" "Yes, I did," Adam replied. "Did she like it?" "Oh yes! She jumped up, thanked me, kissed me on the forehead, and ran out the door, yelling, "I'll be back in an hour!"
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Adam asked God.....
"God, why did you make Eve so beautiful?"
"So that you would like her."
"But why you make her so dumb too?"
"So that she would like you too."
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands
When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
You're running around with other women, she charged.
You're being unreasonable, Adam responded. You're the only woman on Earth. The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.
What do you think you're doing? Adam demanded. Counting your ribs!
A Creationist and Atheist Debate
Creationist: If man evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Atheist: If Adam came from dirt, why is there still dirt?
A Briton, a Frenchman, and a Russian are standing and staring at a portrait of Adam and Eve...
"Look at their calm, their reserve" says the Briton. "Surely they must be British!"
"Nonsense!" Replies the Frenchman. "They are beautiful. Surely they must be French!"
The Russian finally speaks, "they have no clothes, no shelter, only an apple to eat, and are being told this is paradise. They are Russian."
One Sunday, with one hand motion, God caused the Earth to begin to revolve around the Sun. "What should we call it when it goes all the way around?" asks Adam.
"A year," God replied.
Now, he made another hand motion, and the Earth began to rotate on a tilted axis.
"What should we call it when it rotates all the way around?" Adam asks.
God sighs and takes a seat on the grass below. "Let's call it a day."
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A Brit, a Frenchman and a Soviet are asked what nationality Adam and Eve were.
The Brit exclaims They must have been British! Look at how gentlemanly Adam behaved towards Eve. He must have been an Englishman.
Outrageous! Says the Frenchman. They must have been French. Look at the love that they exhibited towards each other! Only the French can love like that.
The Soviet chuckles and says You're both wrong. They must have been Soviet; they had no clothes, no food, and someone in charge was telling them they were in paradise .
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Those people who are against gay marriage and say...
''In Genesis it was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve'', are so narrow minded..
Everyone knows that in Genesis it was Phil Collins, Tony Banks and Mike Rutherford..
Adam and Eve had been brainstorming with God for what felt like an eternity.
"Two dozen hours?" asked Adam.
"One seventh of a week?" suggested Eve.
God shook his head and sighed. "Let's just call it a day."
A child asked his father:
"How were people born"? So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and had babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him: "We were monkeys, then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
"This is the hardest part of our job," said the police officer after Adam was pronounced dead in the accident.
"Yeah, but break the news slowly. His wife is a very sensitive person."
The police officer knocks on the door and Adam's wife opens it.
"Are you Adam's widow?" said the police.
God asked Adam to name the animals
Adam began to invent names, Lion, Tiger, Horse, Cow, Pig…
Then God said, You must name the sea animals, too
Adam was tired already, so he said, Sea lion, Tiger shark, Sea horse, Sea cow, Sea pig…
Because it wasn't good for Adam to be all by himself, the Lord came down for a visit.
"Adam," the Lord said, "I have a plan to make you a very happy man. I'm going to give you a companion who will fulfill your every need and desire. She will be loving, and beautiful, and faithful. She will make you feel wonderful every day of your life."
Adam was stunned, "That sounds incredible!"
"I'm glad you like the idea, but it doesn't come cheap." The Lord replied. "It will cost you an arm and a leg."
"That's a pretty high price to pay," Adam said. "What can I get for a rib?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said,
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
What was the first thing Adam said to Eve?
The topic for my ninth-grade class was palindromes, words or sentences that are the same read forward and backward. I asked the question, "What was the first thing Adam said to Eve?"
I was expecting the answer "Madam, I'm Adam," but one student had a better reply:
"Wow."
After Adam and Eve arrived in Eden, he stayed out late a few nights wandering the garden.
Eve became suspicious.
Are you running around with another woman? Eve fired off.
What other woman? Adam exclaimed You're it!
That night, Adam was awakened by Eve poking him in the chest.
What are you doing?
Counting your ribs.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Three nuns die in a car c**..., when they get to heaven, the angel says they have to answer a question to get in
So the angel asks the first nun
Who was the first man?
And the nun replies, Adam
The angel allows her in and turns to the second nun
Who was the first woman?
The second nun answers Eve
Correct, in you go replies the angel
Then turning to the third nun the angel asks
I'm afraid this question is rather difficult. What did Eve say when she first saw Adam?
The third nun thinking says Oh, that's a hard one
Yes, you're in. Replies the angel.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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A Frenchman, and Englishman, and a Soviet are admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden.
The Frenchman says, They must be French, they're n**... and they're eating fruit.
The Englishman says, Clearly, they're English; observe how politely the women is offering fruit to the man.
The Soviet replies, No, they are Russian communists, of course. They have no house, nothing to wear, little to eat, and they think they are in Paradise.
Three Nuns Die And Each Have To Answer A Question From God To Get Into Heaven...
God asks the first Nun, "Who were the first two people?"
She says, "Adam and Eve".
He says, "Okay, you're in."
God asks the second Nun, "Where did Adam and Eve live?"
She says, "The Garden of Eden".
He says, "Okay, you're in."
God asks the third Nun, "What was the first thing Eve said when she saw Adam?"
She says, "Hmm, that's a hard one."
He says, "Okay, you're in."
How were people born?
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
After God created Adam, Adam came to God and said, You created all the animals and each one has a mate, but I'm alone. Can you create me one also?
God replied, Well Adam, I can create a mate for you. It will be the crown of my creation, someone who will serve you, and your every need and desire. The most beautiful and loving creature. She will take care of you always , and give you all the respect that is deserving of you. The only thing is, it will cost you an arm and a leg.
Adam thought for a second and said, What do you got for a rib?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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A Brit, A Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the garden of Eden
"Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit."They must be British"
They pondered this possibility but the Frenchman and the Russians soon shake their heads in disagreement.
"Nonsense," says the Frenchman. "They're n**... and so beautiful, clearly they are French". The Brit and Russian agreed on this point but the Russian soon raises an objection to this.
"No clothes, no shelter and they have only an apple to eat but they're told this is Paradise. They are clearly Russian"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Brit, a French person and a Russian are looking at a painting of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden.
The Brit says, Look, they are so calm and reserved, they must be British.
The French person says, No, look at how beautiful they are, they must be French.
The Russian says, Are you kidding me? They have no clothes and no shelter with only an apple to eat and they're being told they live in paradise. Clearly they're Russian.
When I was 8, I had a friend who was raised by atheists.
He once told me, I don't know where Adam and Eve is...
Are, I corrected. And they're in heaven.
I don't know where Adam and Eve are, he corrected. But my mom and dad sure do shop there often.
Adam Johnson, the man pictured carrying House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's lectern during the Capitol riot, has been arrested in Florida
His lawyer has confirmed that at trial he will not be taking the stand.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Cain, son of Adam, had a s**... load of responsibilities.
Aside from being a farmer Cain was supposed to m**... his brother and do a whole slew of other s**... so that future generations could learn from his mistakes. The lord felt pity for Cain's workload and assigned another human to shoulder some of the load. He called him co-cain. Co-cain helped him get s**... done.
Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands.
When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
"You're running around with other women." she charged.
"You're being very unreasonable," Adam responded. "You're the only woman on Earth."
The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.
"Just what do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
"Counting your ribs," replied Eve
3 nuns go up to heaven...
Three nuns go up to heaven. Peter's at the gates and he tells them they have to answer a question before they can come in. So he says to the first one "what was the name of the first woman?" She says "Eve" and he lets her in. He says to the second one "where did Eve live?" She says "the Garden of Eden" and she too is allowed in. Then he says to the third nun "what was the first thing Eve said when she saw Adam?" She says "oh, that's a hard one", and he says "yeah, you're in…"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What nationality were Adam and Eve?
Soviet, of course. Who else would walk around barefoot and n**..., have one apple to share between them, and think they were in Paradise?
Adam was returning home late one night at paradise after drinking with the dodo and the unicorn.
Eve got angry and yelled at him: "YOU ARE SEEING ANOTHER WOMAN!"
Adam responded: "Don't be silly, you are the only woman on earth", and went to sleep.
Later that night Adam woke up, feeling a tickle in his chest and saw it was Eve.
"What the heck are you doing?" he asked
"I'm counting your ribs," she responded.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My wife thought it would be fun if we each have a list of 3 people that would be OK to sleep with if given the chance.
**Her list:** Paul Rudd, Adam Levine, and Channing Tatum
**My list:** Her best friend Stephanie, that barista at our coffee shop, and my ex girlfriend
An Englishman, Frenchman and a Soviet go to an art exhibition.
They come to a marble bust of Adam and Eve. The Englishman says "Look at their calm repose, their stiff upper lip. They must have been English."
The Frenchman says "Look at their nakedness, their natural artistic beauty. They must have been French."
The Soviet goes "No no. They have no food, no water, no clothes and no shelter, and they're told they live in a Paradise. They're obviously Russian!"
Joke best told with very bad accents
Shortly after creating them, God is introducing Adam and Eve to The Garden.
"These are the trees and bushes that bear fruit for you to eat. These are the bodies of water, for you to drink from. These are the animals, for you to name. And this is the forbidden fruit, which you must never eat."
"And what's that?" says Eve, pointing to something on her left.
"Oh that?" says God, realizing Eve is pointing at Queen Elizabeth. "I don't know, that was there when I got here."
^Just ^a ^joke ^I ^heard ^a ^long ^time ^ago, ^which ^felt ^relevant ^today. ^RIP
An Englishman, a Frenchman and a Russian...
...are in The Louvre, looking at a painting of Adam and Eve.
"Behold!" says the Englishman. "Their resolve in adversity. Their stoicism. They must be English!".
"Nonsense!" cries the Frenchman. "Look at them. They are elegant. They are poised. They are beautiful. Surely they must be French?".
The Russian is quiet for a moment. Then he speaks.
"They have no clothes. They have no shelter. They have only apple to eat between them and are being told this is paradise.
They are Russian".
So it's ok for DC to call a character Black Adam?
But when I call my coworker Black Tony I get called into HR.
Dad you told me yesterday that we all came from Adam and Eve,
when I asked you about our ancestral history. "ok, then what" said dad. But mom was telling something different. She said that we all were monkeys and with passage of time and evolution changed us to human beings. Dad had a sigh of relief and replied, I was talking about my family, she was talking about her family.
Adam tells God he's really lonely on earth alone
God says "Adam I'm going to make you a woman."
Adam says "what's that?"
God says "It's another human that you will able to bond with. She'll love you, care for you, cook for you, worship you and tend to your every desire. She will be at your beckon call, give you offspring and you will never want for anything else in life again."
Adam says "that sounds wonderful Lord. What will it cost me?"
God says "it will cost you an arm and a leg."
Adam thinks for a second and says "what can I get for a rib?"
