Following is our collection of paranoia humor and symptoms one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. They include Acute puns for adults, dirty angle jokes or clean obtuse gags for kids.
There is an abundance of intense jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 38 funniest jokes on acute. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any icu witze you can hear about acute.
Two friends were walking by when they saw a poster with a joke on it. It said "Are you cold at the moment? Come to the corner, it's 90 degrees."
"Wow," said the first friend. "That's acute joke."
"Eh, not really." said the second friend. "Actually it's all right."
Sorry, wrong bus!
So two residents at the old age home are about to hook up. They're getting all hot and heavy in the woman's room.
Suddenly, she stops and says to the man, "Before we go any further, I should tell you I have acute angina."
To which the man replies reassuringly, "At my age, I don't care *what* it looks like."
Trump said "It's not just cute, it's **the cutest** narcissistic personality disorder in the world. Believe me."
A man rings his gran and asks how her doctor's appointment went.
"He hit on you? No Gran, I'm sure he was just being nice."
A few seconds pause.
"No Gran, he said you had acute angina."
He said I had acute angina
It might have just been because she was dyslexic but I thought it was acute.
Doc comes out and says to husband,
"She has acute angina"
Husband says, "I know.....I know..but what is wrong with her?"
Interviewer: We want a person with suspicious mind, always alert, merciless, ready to attack, acute sense of hearing, detective ability and most importantly having a killer Instinct. So, do you think you are eligible?
Man: Sir... Can my wife apply?
and one day they see an abandoned house and go inside. When they go inside however, they realized that there's only one bed. The floor was filthy, so they had no choice but to sleep on the same bed. The next morning, the two men sleeping on each side of the bed awoke and started to notice an acute pain coming from their privates. The man in the middle however, told them he had an intense and wonderful dream about skiing.
The nursing home doctor suggests they each get a physical before tying the knot.
The doctor examines the woman first. When the man comes in, the doctor tells him, "before we begin, I should tell you that your fiancee has acute angina."
"I know, doc. I've seen it several times already. That's why I'm marrying her!"
A prostitute is recently diagnosed with heart trouble but decides to go to "work" anyway.
She is approached by a potential customer and tells him, "It's gonna be 50 dollars, but I have to tell you, I have acute angina."
He replies, "Well I hope so, because your face is kind of ugly."
The consultant said, "Mr Smith, your wife has acute angina"
I said, "Yes I know that, but how's her heart ?"
I said, sorry doc, I'm married.
He had an acute pain in his side!
He couldn't figure out acute angle.
She said I had acute tendinitis.
Cos you're acute angle.
If you're cold, just go sit in a corner. It's 90 degrees there.
He was acute until he took a 180.
Acute snake
My you're looking "acute" today.
Neurotic Patient "I came here to be treated, not admired"
Because from this angle, you are not acute.
A blonde has sharp pains in her side, so she goes to the hospital. The doctor examines her and says, "You have acute appendicitis."
The blonde says, "That's sweet, doc, but I came here to get medical help."
Man: I can't say that I do.
Therapist: Exactly. That's the main one.
Acute slice.
So it could be acute triangle
Your acute.
(Squiggly line because gay because squiggly line =/= straight)
Especially when they're acute.
Patient says that's good news!
The doctor then follows up saying you need anugly care.
Well it's because, early on. Square and Circle were ugly babies, but the triangle was acute one :)
Come sit in the corner. It's 90º.
That's an acute joke.
No, it's right.
Because hes not allowed to date acute girl, so he's trying to look at it from another angle
and says 'That's acute accent.'
I heard it protects them from acute pain and obtuse people.
Acute angle.
when the wife complains of a burning sensation in her chest. The husband suggests that she visit the doctor. She arranges the appointment and goes the next day.
The doctor calls the husband the next day and says, "Sir, you're wife has acute angina." The husband replies, "You don't have to tell me twice, doc. Whats the bad news?"
Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.