Actor Played Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
During interviews he seems like such a nice guy, but the actor who plays Wolverine is a real phoney
It's a huge act, man..
Dramatic Arts
Little Charlie has had his dreams set on becoming an actor, and, finally, he lands a part in the school play. He runs home after school to tell his dad. "That's fantastic!" his father replies. "Who do you play?" he asks. "Dad, I play a guy who's been married for twenty years!" His dad plants a hand on Charlie's shoulder, smiling sweetly, and says, "Maybe next time you'll get a speaking part."
Young Actor: "Dad, guess what? I've just got my first part in a play. I play the part of a man who's been married for 30 years."
Father: "Well, keep at it, son. Maybe one day you'll get a speaking part."
Most people don't realize that the actor from the volleyball scene in Top Gun: Maverick...
...is the same actor who played Wilson in the 2000 movie "Castaway".
An old actor has trouble getting work due to failing memory...
After contacting many people that he worked with in the past , he is finally able to land a job in a popular new Broadway play. The director tells him its only one line at the beginning of the play, but it is a very important line. It sets the mood for the rest of the play. It is ESSENTIAL he nails the line. The old actor emphasizes that he will nail it. The director reluctantly agrees and proceeds to tell him his role. You will take a beautiful rose, bring it to your nose and take a deep breath and say the following line: *Ah, the sweet scent of my mistress…* That's it. Do not screw this up! The old actor thanks him 10 times over and proceeds to practice for the next 2 weeks nonstop.
Opening night comes. It's a sold out theater. He takes to the stage, spotlight on him. He raises his hand, takes a deep breath and says the line perfectly * Ah, the sweet scent of my mistress… * Just after the line is delivered the auditorium burst into laughter. He walks off the stage distraught. I don't get it. I nailed the line perfectly. What happened? The director looks at him and yells YOU IDIOT! YOU FORGOT THE FLOWER!
If the actor who plays Wolverine were to reveal that he's been a con-artist his entire life....
Would that mean this has all been a huge act, man?
I was playing an updated version of Oregon Trail voiced by Terry Crews.
I made the comment that he wasn't a good voice actor, and the game abruptly ended. Apparently, I died of dissin' Terry.
Why do actors tell each other to "break a leg"?
Because every play needs a cast.
"That is him." I said to my wife in the shopping centre.
"That's Kenny Baker, the actor who played R2D2 in Star Wars."
"Are you sure?" she asked. "It doesn't look like him, go on over and ask."
A couple of minutes later I walked back over to her. "Well, what did he say?"
"Nothing." I said. "It's a rubbish bin."
Why do we tell all actors to 'break a leg'?
Because every play has a cast.
Why does America have the best movie industry in the world?
In the rest of the world, all the best actors play soccer.
You can explore actor played reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean actor played dad jokes. There are also actor played puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Why do people tell actors to break a leg?
Because every play needs a cast.
The original actor who played Captain Kirk tried to start a Star Trek themed line of women's l**....
But no one would invest in Shatner p**....
(An oldie, but deserved a fresh posting)
Three actors are deciding on roles for a movie about classical music.
Matt Damon, Brad Pitt and Arnold Schwarzenegger are all taking part in a new movie about classical composers.
"I think I'll play Beethoven!" declared Matt.
"I'd like the role of Mozart!" Brad decided.
"I'll be Bach." said Arnie.
As an actor, you either die,
Or live long enought to play Batman.
Which actor could never play Quasimodo?
Humpfree Bogart
Some actors were planning to make a movie on famous composers
Arnold Schwarzenegger, Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hanks were all making a movie about famous composers. Leo said, "I'd like to play Beethoven." Tom said, "I'd like to play Mozart." Arnie said "I'll be Bach"
I should stay up until 3 in the morning more often
I want to make a show with the two actors who have played Khan in the different Star Trek films where we discuss literature. We will call it "Prose and Khans".
A large movie studio is making a movie about famous musical composers played by very muscular actors. They had all of the actors choose who they wanted to be.
Dwayne Johnson chose Mozart.
Lou Ferrigno wanted Beethoven.
When asked who he wanted to play, Arnold Schwarzenegger said, I'll be Bach.
I hate having to gain weight to play a role...
and then remembering I'm not an actor.
I've been holding auditions for actors to play a new Fantastic Four team this afternoon...
... it's so stressful.
It's just been one Thing after another.
A group of actors performed an on stage reading of the Oxford dictionary.
The audience wasn't too enthralled with a play on words.
I think mascots are the hardest roles for actors to play.
They really have to get into their characters.
What do male prostitutes and the actor who played inspector clouseau have in common?
They're both Peter Sellers.
What does the actor who plays Bucky Barnes have in commom with his overzealous supporters?
They're all Sebastian stans.
Can anyone tell me the actors name who played Forest Gump?
T hanks.
I just found out the actor who played Mini-Me in Austin Powers died.
rip
The Chancellor of Germany, Prince Harry's wife, and the actor who played Gollum should set up an emporium of p**... wigs in Sarkel, Russia
...and call it "Merkel, Markle and Serkis' Sarkel Merkin Circus"
I just don't know about this actor they have playing Pennywise in the new IT movie...
He's got some big shoes to fill.
My wife Emily and I have a celebrity exemption rule for extramarital affairs.
Evidently she thought it included the actor playing George in the local production of "Our Town."
The actor who plays Wolverine once owned a sea cow, but it was murdered...
...it was a crime against Hugh's manatee.
Why do we tell actors to break a leg
Because every play has a cast
What do you call a play with soft drink actors?
What do you call a play with soft drink actors?
A fantamime
When actors get drunk
To play a scene where a character is drunk it's method acting
So I'm sure breaking bad must have had plenty of m**... head acting
The other day I was casting for a movie about my life
I'd chosen the actor to play my father, but he said "I don't wanna be your father"
To which I replied "Perfect, you already know your lines"
