The Best 29 Action Figure Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Action Figure jokes. There are some action figure jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these action figure puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Action Figure Jokes and Puns

My 4 year old son just got me with a dad joke I hadn't heard before.

My son was playing with his teenage mutant ninja turtle action figures, and was making them fight each other.

Me: "Where are their weapons? Are they just fighting with their bare hands?"

Son: "No, they are fighting with their turtle hands."

Doesn't have a clue why I was laughing so hard.

I asked the toy store sales assistant if they had any Arnold Schwarzenegger action figures in store...

She replied "Aisle B, back".

Have you heard about the incel action figure?

It comes in a sock instead of a box.

I think me life is like the Truman Show.

I was tryin' ta figure out what type a genre show it be.

I thought, "It might be a drama," but me life isn't sad enough.

I thought, "It might be an action tale," but alas, 'tis too boring.

"Then, perhaps, it be a comedy," I thought, but me life isn't funny, so I cast that idea overboard.

"Well," I thought, "it might be British."

So I've been trying to sell my Ubermensch Action Figures...

But it's difficult to cater to such a Nietszche Market.


I saw a Star wars action figure in a Corolla today

It was a toy Yoda in a Toyota

Did you guys hear about the new Ray Lewis action figure?

Batteries included.

If it makes you feel any better I made the joke up a few months ago and it was a Chris Brown joke, but with Rice being topical and all.

Which popular action figure has a farm?

GI GI Joe

Where are the Arnold Schwarzenegger action figures?

Aisle B, back

I already used my wishes

Me: please just one more wish

Genie: no, I said 3

Me: please

Genie: no

Me: [holding my new Leonardo, Michelangelo, and Donatello action figures] Genie please

My son was playing with miniature models of a court room.

He told me they were "class action figures."

You can explore action figure reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean action figure dad jokes. There are also action figure puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Making 6 figures a year sounds like a dream come true...

Unless you work for an action figure manufacturing company. Then it sounds like a quick way to the unemployment line.

A bunch of 80s action stars dressed up as Skid Row for Halloween but they couldn't figure out who would be the lead singer.

But Arnold Schwarzenegger said "I'll be Bach"

Who's Immature?

My wife accused me of being immature. I set down my action figures, pointed at the door and said 'get out of my secret lair'

What do you call a green-skinned, pointy-eared Star Wars action figure driving a Japanese car?

A toy Yoda driving a Toyota.

What is the difference between a Star Wars action-figure collector who smokes e-cigarettes and a Catholic Priest?

One is a toy-loving vapist, and the other...

A frog wants to get a loan

He goes to a bank and there is a pig behind the front desk.

The pig introduces herself
I'm Pattywack, how may I help you

The frog asks for a loan and to use an action figure as collateral.

Pattywack explains that the action figure is not enough to be collateral.

Pattywack's boss overhears this and enters saying
It's a knickknack, Pattywack, give this frog a loan.

Yo Momma is so fat…

That she makes Godzilla look like an action figure.

I just opened an action figure factory

It's a pretty small operation right now, just me and my buddy Frank and we're only making one kind of Dracula action figure. We really need to get things off the ground so I have to make every second Count.


Working in an Action Man factory pays very well indeed...

You can make six figures in an hour.

Masturbating is a lot like master-baiting.

If you can't figure out the fly, your rod isn't gonna be seeing any action.

I went into a toy store for some Christmas shopping and asked the clerk, "Where are the Schwarzenegger action figures?"

He said: "Aisle B, back."

Human organs are the opposite of old action figures

People are willing to pay a lot more for them once you take them out to the original packaging

What car does a star wars action figure drive?

Toyota

I ordered a set of Avengers action figures. [Infinity War Spoilers]

Half of them were just boxes of dirt.

I hear they came out with a new Chris Brown action figure

Battery sold separately

Did you guys hear about how Mattel took back all those Terminator action figures?

It was a *Total Recall*

Jeez mom!

They aren't sex dolls, they're sex action figures!!

When I was a kid, my Chuck Norris action figure broke all my other toys while I was at school.



When my mom tried to throw him away, he killed her.


Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the action figure jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working action figure piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes