Acre Jokes

8 acre jokes and hilarious acre puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about acre that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Share These Acre Jokes With Friends

Fun-Filled Acre Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle

What is a good acre joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

A quarter acre of undeveloped land may not seem like much to some people,

But to me it's a lot.

Vermont farmer

A texas cattle rancher came to visit a Vermont dairy farm. He gets a tour of the 10 acre farm, and says to the Vermont farmer "This farm aint nothin, my ranch back in texas is so big, it would take us 3 days just to drive my truck around the whole property". The Vermont farmer responds "yup I had a truck like that once"

My neighbor has a 15 acre farm, he breeds dogs to do work on them. He grows cantaloupe, and come harvest time the dogs sniff out the ripe ones and bring them back to the barn.

He says the breed are Melon Collies

I heard my lawnmower was going on a rampage...

It was going on a *grass*acre
[Grass acre, grass massacre](#spoiler)

Who's the biggest player in the Hundred Acre Wood?

Eeyore, he's always chasing that tail.

Why doesn't anyone wear pants in the hundred acre wood?

It makes it easier for winnie to pooh

The Ecuadorean Public Works Minister visits his Argentinian counterpart

The Argentinian sends his chauffeur to pick him up in his Mercedes Maybach for lunch in his 10 acre estate. Whilst enjoying lobster, the Ecuadorian asks "where do you get your money from?" The Argentinian says: "do you see that bridge? 30%". Both laugh.

Six months later it's the Argentinian Public Works Minister visiting. He is picked up in a private helicopter and flown to a 200 acre estate on a private island. Whilst enjoying Beluga Caviar the Argentinian asks "where do you get your money from?" The Ecuadorean says: "do you see that bridge?" "Which bridge?" asks the Argentinian puzzled. "See??" replies the Ecuadorean.

What do you call a Speakeasy in the hundred acre woods?

A blind Tigger.

Share These Acre Jokes With Friends