Acidic Jokes
46 acidic jokes and hilarious acidic puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about acidic that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Acidic Short Jokes
Short acidic jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The acidic humour may include short sour jokes also.
- My chemistry teacher told me I had to write a 1,000 word essay on acid. Unfortunately, my pen turned into a gorilla and the floor melted.
- A chemistry lab is a lot like a party... Some people drop acid while others drop the base.
- Sodium Chloride and Sulphuric Acid were in jail Turns out they were in for assault and battery
- Totally sick of idiots letting firework off early, it's still October for goodness sake!!! Dog is going mad and keeps knocking the Christmas tree over!
- I think my dog is upset I quit doing drugs He hasn't talked to me since the last time I dropped acid.
- My Mom said to stop drinking soda because it has acid in it. I replied," Stop making such baseless accusations".
- What do you call an attractive, Jewish lemon with no worldly possessions? An aesthetic ascetic acidic Hasidic.
- What's the difference between a raver and a chemist at a club? One drops acid while the other drops the base.
- Did you hear about the guy who is accused of attacking people with acid? I think that these accusations are baseless.
- Being a clumsy chemist is like going to the rave... Sometimes you drop the base and trip on acid.
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Acidic One Liners
Which acidic one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with acidic? I can suggest the ones about acid base and acids and bases.
- I'll never forget my dog's last words "You've taken too much acid."
- Why would the military use acid? To neutralize the enemy base.
- I was arrested for drinking battery acid. But I wasn't charged.
- What are Mexican proteins made of? Amigo-acids
- Throwing acid is wrong... ...in some people's eyes.
- Why do people take acid at raves? Because there's so much base.
- Some acids walked into the enemy base... Threat Neutralized.
- I was on acid and I actually tasted colors. Tasted a lot like paint.
- I've heard rumors acid is dangerous. Pretty sure they are baseless though.
- What do you call an acid with an attitude? A-mean-o acid.
- Coffee is acidic. Until you add pumpkin and spices... Then it becomes basic.
- What do you call a protein that has anger management issues? Amino acid!
- How are synagogues like lemons? They're full of acidic juice.
- Why do orthodox rabbis like lemonade so much? Because, it's acidic juice.
- I did some acid before I took my vision exam. It went great, I passed with flying colors.

Hilarious Acidic Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter
What funny jokes about acidic you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bitter jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make acidic pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between an orange and the Torah?
One can make acidic juice and the other can make Hasidic Jews
(Just made this up today)
Husband's night out
An angry housewife met her husband at the front door and immediately noticed he smelled of alcohol and perfume.
"I assume," she said with her most acidic sarcasm, "That there must be a very good reason for your coming home at six o'clock in the morning with booze on your breath and another woman's perfume all over you."
"There is," he said. "I'd like breakfast."
Here's one for all of you baseball and chemistry fans
Hall of Famer Al Kaline wore #6 throughout his career, which actually makes him slightly acidic.
even though coffee is more acidic, all Starbucks coffee products have a pH of 14
Extremely basic
What do you call an orthodox jew that is prone to heartburn?
Acidic.
[My apologies]
My cousin always introduces himself as "Stephen with a P-H"
It's because he's slightly acidic
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did h**... hate lemonade?
Because it is an acidic juice.
A scientists asks people on the street whats the most acidic thing they own. One man answers its his phone. The scientist replies: No, acidic does not mean dirty
The man replies: I know, my phone has a ph of one
What is the most acidic soup?
Ph0
Everyone knows part of the way toothpaste works is by equalizing the acidic substances in your mouth.
I mean, it's basic science.
Do Hasidic Jews like Acidic Juice?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did h**... hate wine?
Acidic Juice.
I went to a Vietnamese soup shop and ordered their top-selling soup.
Me: Is this soup acidic?
Waitress: No, because it's pH0.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do n**...'s hate Starburst candy?
Because they are acidic chews.
If Net Neutrality is repealed...
Will the Internet be acidic or basic?
What do you call an unsweetened, kosher lemonade?
acidic juice
The substance was mildly acidic on the pH scale
It was a solid 5/7
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a rabbi with heart burn?
Acidic Jew
I am attracted to houses.
When I came into my friends' house, she looked at me, absolutely disgusted and gave me an acidic wet wipe to clean up with.
When you neutralize an acidic solution in a titration, what do you do?
Drop the base.
The Hydrogen + ion got into a fight with the Hydrogen Oxide - ion online
The H + called the OH - too basic and the OH - called the H+ to acidic.
What's orange, thick skinned, highly acidic and a total fruit?
An orange.
Basic Foods
My girlfriend has been getting canker sores, so she went to the doctor. The doctor said," Have you been eating many acidic foods lately?" She said," Yes I've been eating a fair amount of tangerines everyday." The doctor replied," I recommend more basic foods in your diet. Try to have at least one Pumpkin Spice Latte a day."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Yo girl, do you contain lots of Hydrogen ions?
'Cause you have an acidic personality.
My cellphone is incredibly acidic...
It's a pH one
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a lemon wearing a yamaka?
An acidic Jew
I wish I had a more acidic wit
Unfortunately mine's very basic.

